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Why arent Men Widows?

CuteFairy91 IF-Rockerz
CuteFairy91
CuteFairy91

Joined: 16 January 2005
Posts: 5425

Posted: 04 November 2006 at 5:43pm | IP Logged
Hi..

I was watcing Water today on PPV. N a character in the movie asked a really gud question..

"Why arent men widows?"

Why do women have to wear white saris? When someone's wife dies why do they still wear colorful clothes?

CuteManjot Senior Member
CuteManjot
CuteManjot

Joined: 30 June 2006
Posts: 307

Posted: 04 November 2006 at 6:07pm | IP Logged
im not sure this i think goes back o the begging when india was born
ana1 IF-Rockerz
ana1
ana1

Joined: 16 February 2006
Posts: 8385

Posted: 04 November 2006 at 7:08pm | IP Logged
i also think the same
IdeaQueen IF-Dazzler
IdeaQueen
IdeaQueen

Joined: 23 August 2006
Posts: 3152

Posted: 04 November 2006 at 9:04pm | IP Logged
Why are Men not widows????
They don't have any specific procedures,rituals to make them widows(male version).But in my language a person whose wife is nomore(i',e dead ) is called VIDHU and he is not eligible for the performance of rituals ,just like a VIDHVA.
No more comments!!!!
nishi IF-Dazzler
nishi
nishi

Joined: 16 June 2004
Posts: 3194

Posted: 04 November 2006 at 11:40pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by mythili_Kiran

Why are Men not widows????
They don't have any specific procedures,rituals to make them widows(male version).But in my language a person whose wife is nomore(i',e dead ) is called VIDHU and he is not eligible for the performance of rituals ,just like a VIDHVA.
No more comments!!!!
absolutely ......... why shud only women be degraded if their husbands die ?.......
...M... IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 20 October 2006
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Posted: 05 November 2006 at 1:38am | IP Logged
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Morgoth IF-Veteran Member
Morgoth
Morgoth

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Joined: 01 June 2004
Posts: 6832

Posted: 05 November 2006 at 3:49am | IP Logged
IMO, these arbitrary customs were made by men to suit other men.

There is no proper reasoning behind them.
greatmaratha IF-Sizzlerz
greatmaratha
greatmaratha

Joined: 20 September 2004
Posts: 12581

Posted: 05 November 2006 at 9:09am | IP Logged
What I have learnt of the old shastras and customs from my grandparents is while there was a seemingly a discrimination in favour of women folk (I do not agree on the seemingly, but just telling u what I was toldTongue), men also performed certain functions or rituals.

In those days, when Brahmins main occupation was to be a pundit or a vedic scholar, there were many rituals which could not be performed by a Man whose wife is no more.  A grahstasharam man (married man) had more rights than a widower. 

But yes, the amount of restrictions put on women were far more than men. 
The apparent reason was to protect the widowed women from the prying eyes of the men in the neighbourhood.  Many women were widowed even before their puberty and one of the reasons for shaving off their hair and giving them white clothes and making them eat food after others and such other customs was to kill any semblance of desire which can come in her mind and which may lead her astray, thereby putting the deceased man's family to shame.  Hair is considered to be a sign of a womans vanity and the idea of shaving it off is to avoid her desire to look beautiful.  White clothes were for the same purpose. 

These customs are man made and do not find such details in the shastras as passed down over yugs.  If you read Manu Niti Shastra, while it does lay down general behaviour pattern for an ideal man or woman and the right way to conduct themselves in society, these details are not there in this.  It is obviously man made to meet  a certain situation which would have necessitated this rule.  However, it has now become a customDead

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