Are the aloof people misconstrued??

Ever noticed...People who keep to themselves are most of the times misunderstood....People who are usually reticent are often tagged as "ones with attitude"

Whereas the gregarious ones are always considered "warm"....People who laugh loudly,who are extroverted,who act all goody goody ,who play up to the gallery..These people are in everyone's good books

By introverts,I'm not talking about the khadoos kind,But about people who usually dont overreact ,who keep a low profile,during the crests and the troughs,who dont "express" their happiness or their grief...Are these people misconstured as ones with "a standoffish personality".......Because I've seen it happening,the ones who create drama walk away with most of the attention/sympathy(attention mongers),those who arent "expressive" are misunderstood....

Are nautanki and connivance desiderata in today's world....is it necessary to please everyone by sailing with the tide,or is it allright if people are just themselves(natural)....Are the people who are sincere and call a spade a spade said to have an "attitude problem"....Can one afford to be downright straightforward,or is diplomacy and playing up to the gallery indispensable

Your views

 

Edited by Buffie - 11 October 2006 at 9:35pm

wow this is an interesting topic.

I myself am not the quiet type, nor am i overally loud. it depends on the situation and who i am with.

Oftten, when some family friend comes over with their kids, and i dont know them well, i am very shy and quiet- later my mom tells me that im too introverted and not outspoken.

But yes, i understand what you mean by the loud people. Often, these are the people who turn out to be the backbiters and evil, rumor spreading ppl. But one should not be too quiet, and should atleast try to have a conversation, or reply full to their questions- so the ppl dont get the wrong impressions.

Todays world wants to much of ppl. Thin people are in and fat ppl arent. This is just like that. But to over come this is the challenge. You should surrouround urslef with people who you love and who love you, as weel as understand u.

Prakriti

Edited by prakriti - 06 October 2006 at 2:47pm

Nice topic Buffie. Will try to come back later with my views

Its thursday sir

JUst retrieved this thread,perhaps we could have more views

I know what you mean buffie. I agree people who are not too loud or keep things to themselves are often not noticed, which does not surprise me. I have a friend who is very quite, does not talk much, very straightforward person but is not noticed that much. Her qualities are not appreciated by all. I don't think it's anyone else's fault. People usually always react to what they see. So what are you asking..do you want to give them credit for being quite? Why?
Like you said people who laugh loud, extrovert, acting goody-goody are considered warm because they make opposite person feel comfortable. When you meet a group of people anywhere one who talks a lot, smiles a lot, laugh they make you feel comfy around them. They make you feel welcome. On the other side, I know my dad, who is very very introvert person. He never open himself to stranger, which I think really makes stranger feel uncomfy. He is very good by heart, but its just him, that he is introvert and can't laugh loud or say goody-goody to stranger he meet and yes such people are often thought as arrogant. He is quite, so it is normal people don't attract to him usually, on the other hand where my mom is totally opposte she has tons of friends and everyone knows her. I think it's totally normal and I don't think people who stay quite but are realy good deserve extra credit for that.

However, that is the first impression but when you tend to become good friends you kind of change your opinion 'coz the people who "pretend" to be goody-go are not always that good and other way. So I would say first impression is not "always" the last impression.

Dear Buffie!!!
Nice topic !!!!
"Reaction" to a particular "Action" is very much important to anyperson ,any system or any experiment in this world.All are bothered about the reaction very much.Whether a person is introvert or extrovert it does'nt matter, the "reaction" of the person to any gesture,wish,argument,topic ,talk matters."Reaction time" for some people is very slow and some it is very fast.The way one reacts may differ from situation to situation,it may differ from the mental freedom we have at that space.I just don't like people who don't react.One more thing the reality in the reaction is very much important,if its artificial no matter who the person is we may not respect them.People who don't make mess about their ideas,feelings are definitely the most misunderstood people,I'm the one among them.People who create lot of hungama for simple things,their acts may attract people but only to certain level and certain time.
Cheers,
Mythili

Edited by mythili_Kiran - 12 October 2006 at 8:03am

I think the difference between a shy person, and introvert and an arrogant one can be made out by the reception the person gives to the people around him/her.

A shy person would smile and have a welcoming body posture, but would might not be able to convey their feelings in words.

An introvert would have a welcoming but a very formal air about them, and you would not find such a person making small talks.

An arrogant person would at the very outset be judgemental, and their body posture would convey it. They can be choosy about the people they talk to,and these people are not shy. They are picky and that shows a disdain for a fellow human being......hence the tag arrogance.

However,I don't think they deserve any credit for being an introvert - in fact that way probably extroverts should get some extra credits, as they try to make another human being feel comfortable.....

I myself am an introvert and prefer to keep myself aloof. Have often been misunderstood and maligned.