Kumkum Bhagya

Abhigya SS - Vulnerable - PART 7 UPDATED May1st Pg16 - Page 10

putturani thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
This content was originally posted by: indi


So beautifully written πŸ‘!!!  Really hot ... but tastefully done!!!! Loved it!!!!


Thanks Indi! πŸ˜ƒ

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putturani thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
This content was originally posted by: kdsubs

Hi Rani! Have i replied here before? I don't remember. If not, i owe you a more comprehensive comment - sometime when i get around to re-reading it. For now, i will limit my comment to the last update.

I love how you have woven their emotions through their actions. Her aching vulnerability to him; his gnawing need to heal the one he has hurt the most. Each of their actions brings these facets out. And that my friend, is powerful writing.

I am not a big fan of smut for the sake of it. Not that i am a prude (or at least, i like to think i am not one πŸ˜†). But because sex, or its corollary - love making, is an extremely powerful narrative tool. But unfortunately majority fictions use it just for the heck of it. Just to have some sleaze in the story. However, when its used as a narrative device, it can rock your boat. And you have been doing so with this tale. πŸ‘

And - i just have to say this. Your writing is very ... polished. The care you take, the love you pour into the craft just shines through. Very well done Rani. And please - do keep writing.


Hi Kat! Welcome! First time you're replying here. πŸ˜ƒ Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment. 

If you're a prude, then I'm a prude too (at least when it comes to my own writing πŸ˜†). I don't generally trust myself with sex scenes but for some reason the characters didn't let me do anything  else (probably they've been deprived for too longπŸ˜†).

And you're absolutely right, for some reason this story did grab me by the heart and didn't get go till I started writing it. Happy to have you here and hope you enjoy the rest of the journey. 
valschanya thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
HOT.

This was no simple smut. This was Abhi's way to absolve his sins and I couldn't think of any better way for him to do it. He waited 10 months, respected her wishes without being told twice, and he basically offered himself for her taking- anyway she wants. That's repentance right there. Though I firmly believe that our Pragya should not let him off so easy.

Cannot wait to see how this will be played out!



so I just realized I've already written on your post. do i suffer from some kind of memory loss? no way can someone just forget a story as outstanding as yours! anyhoo, seems like your writing can still leave me with deep impressions- even if it's my second time reading it. :)Edited by valschanya - 9 years ago
Miss.M thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Rani forgive me!!! I cannot believe I missed this...even after Mina Di told me about it! It was super hot!! Loved it!
I'm going to res the rest of the comment...go read it again...take it in...find my words and then unres!
putturani thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
This content was originally posted by: Fanaah

Res...

Gonna hate me for posting so many res'es, but I'm determined to reply to all the chapters and saving the spot will be a good reminder! πŸ˜³

U/R

For: PART 1 - ENDINGS AND BEGINNINGS

YAY! Finally here! 

And what an absolute PERFECT chapter title, Rani-sa! You always know how to start chapters with a "BANG!" and this was no different! I liked the slight glimpse at the past between Pragya's leave from MM and the current timeline.

I liked how Pragya didn't succumb to Abhi's apologies. I DO feel for him, par Pragya ko toh bohot gehra chot lagi thi, so long apology banta hai! And while I'm glad to see that this is a redemption story, I can't help but be curious about justhow Abhi found-out the truth about the MMS. I'm hoping you'll be expanding on that sometime later in this story! πŸ˜Š

In the mean time, I'm off to read the next part!


Pri!! Did I ever tell you thank you for un-resing all of this so diligently? πŸ€— I think I mentioned how he found out about the MMS no? At the end of Endings Pragya throws some wrenches into Abhi's logic as for why she can't be responsible and that gets him thinking. He then confronts Mitali bhabhi and she cracks. Sorry if that wasn't too clear. 
This content was originally posted by: Fanaah

U/R

For: PART 2 - MEETING

O.M.G.!!!

O___O

I was expecting the regret, sadness, loneliness, desperation, anger, hope, and a myriad of other feeling, but the, "you want me vulnerable? As you wish" just KILLED it!

HOL~Y! πŸ˜²

I did NOT see this coming! Now I'm eager to see what Abhi does (and DAMN IT! I only vaguely remember the rest of the fic! πŸ˜‘)

*runs off to read the next chapter*


Thank you Pri! You ever saw Princess Bride? I mighhtt have lifted a line from there πŸ˜³
This content was originally posted by: Fanaah

U/R

For: PART 3 - BONDED

... Well, this is ONE way for Abhi to be vulnerable. I probably should've guessed, especially with the warning you gave, but...

It felt a lot darker than I guessed it would be, probably because of Pragya's dialogue: "Of course. Of course you wouldn't voluntarily be attracted to poor little Chashmish. But your body wants it. And maybe I'll give it what it needs. Everybody already thinks I'm damaged goods. Might as well get something out of the bargain. Anyway behenjis like me wouldn't get kissed any other way" and it's implications and how it was quite similar to what Abhi said to her in the prequel. My mind-scape can clearly substitute this image over the previous one. The feelings, though, Pragya is almost relishing the power she has. While it might be helping her have power over her husband, I just hope she doesn't get overly drunk and go on a power trip because it can get really bad really fast!

One of the best lines was, "It was so ironic that even though he was being tied to a lamp bracket with his own nuptial knot, he felt freer than he had in months. As she tightened the knot around his wrist, the knot in his heart loosened with hope."

Love the semi-dark direction of the story (I'm messed-up that way). On to the next part!


YESS!! I intended for those two scenes to layer over each other! πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒ Maybe I should have collapsed Endings and Vulnerable into one fic but this part of the story was so dear to me I just had to have it on it's own.

Somehow it ended up a lot darker than even I expected but I'm glad you're just as twisted as me and liked it. πŸ˜† Thank you for your detailed feedback Pri!
This content was originally posted by: Fanaah

Res 4... 

It is so hard to do this on the phone... πŸ˜•

U/R

For: PART 4 - EXPLOSION

*snort* ... Well, Pragya can't be anymore clearer than she was... JE~SUS!

If it was the previous Abhi and in this situation, I have no doubt he would've been on the power-trip, but here, both are older, have been hurt by each other, regret how things happened and want to move forward, but can't because theyARE the only for the other. Their situation in the here and now necessitates this action and just...

*shrugs helplessly*

No words, Love!


πŸ˜† I love your perfectly-timed snorts. Thank you! That's the entire Bhagya in this, isn't it?
This content was originally posted by: Fanaah

Res 5...

Almost there... Wish I started commenting from the beginning... πŸ€’  SORRY!!!

U/R

For: PART 5 - SHATTER

WOW! You shattered me with this chapter as well! The blending of their physical attraction and emotions was so beautiful and to perfection! πŸ‘

The scene was SIZZLING, but there are softer feelings along with the roughness and just WOW!

I LOVED the part where Abhi calls her Chashmish! πŸ˜ƒ I was all, "FINALLY OMG YAY!!!"

☺️

I see their journey is on-going, still. I'm eager to read more so please update soon, yes?! YES?! *begging*


Thank you Pri! πŸ˜ƒ More important were the feelings than the physical stuff, although I can imagine that stuff was pretty fun too. πŸ˜† The Chashmish part was one of my faves too and now mirrors the show too because Abhi only calls her Pragya nowadays. πŸ˜‘ Updating soon!
putturani thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago

Thanks Prithi! πŸ˜Š
This content was originally posted by: valschanya

HOT.

This was no simple smut. This was Abhi's way to absolve his sins and I couldn't think of any better way for him to do it. He waited 10 months, respected her wishes without being told twice, and he basically offered himself for her taking- anyway she wants. That's repentance right there. Though I firmly believe that our Pragya should not let him off so easy. 

Cannot wait to see how this will be played out!



so I just realized I've already written on your post. do i suffer from some kind of memory loss? no way can someone just forget a story as outstanding as yours! anyhoo, seems like your writing can still leave me with deep impressions- even if it's my second time reading it. :)


Valschanya, you've described what's going on in the story better than I have. πŸ˜†πŸ‘

πŸ˜† So you commenting twice either means you need to get your memory checked out or that I need to update more regularly πŸ˜† Thank you! πŸ˜ƒ
This content was originally posted by: MinMinMehra

Rani forgive me!!! I cannot believe I missed this...even after Mina Di told me about it! It was super hot!! Loved it!

I'm going to res the rest of the comment...go read it again...take it in...find my words and then unres!


MMM so happy to see you here! πŸ˜ƒ So glad you liked it. πŸ˜ƒ
putturani thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Last time - 

"This is sex, Chashmish. This nakedness, this coming apart in each other's arms, this is sex too."

 

Perhaps there was an argument for her to make here, about fairness and reciprocity and getting the "full experience" but she was too tired to make it and his embrace was too warm to leave.

 

"Okay. Now we sleep. And you hold me."


Part 6 - Revelations


Abhi tightened his eyelids against the glaring sunlight. He couldn't remember the last time he hadn't woken up to multiple snoozed alarms. He was just so relaxed, the grey fog that had enveloped him for so long having lifted slightly. Suddenly a low snore jolted him out of his blissful state. Pragya! Last night! His sleep vanished in an instant and the memories came flooding back. How she had claimed him and possessed him. And then how, by trusting him enough to shatter in his arms, she had put him back together.

 

He felt affection swell to an uncomfortable knot in his chest. Whatever did I do to deserve this? Her eyelids fluttered and with affection he felt the weight that he carried around start to descend on him too. Like her cute little snores, this moment too was ephemeral. Soon she would awake and then? How much would she regret sleeping with her estranged husband? He tugged her a little closer and draped a leg over her for good measure. He would have to let her go - reluctantly - when she awoke but he was going to savour these last few moments when she slept. Abhi clamped his eyes closed when she started to stir. Just a little longer. He felt the ghost of her touch trail down his face and onto his chest.

 

"Good morning." Wait a minute, she looked so content.

 

"Good morning." He smiled and leaned over to kiss her.

 

She made a face at their morning breath but relaxed into the kiss, her lips moving languidly w with his. He was just about to pull her closer (if that were even possible!) when the shrill cry of his alarm ripped through the silence.

 

10:15 AM. Shit. He scrambled to extricate himself from the bedclothes without kicking her in the process. Unfortunately, he failed miserably.  

 

"OW!" Even more unfortunately, she had a good right leg herself and swiftly found himself in a tangle on the carpet - butt naked.

 

"What are you doing! Your...tijori is khuli!" She exclaimed through covered eyes. Bit too late for that, isn't it? She had wrapped herself up so thoroughly in the billowing bed cover that only her face peeked through.

 

"Have you looked at the time Chashmish? I would have expected the teacher to be a bit more concerned with time. What's it you always said to me? Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.'" It was difficult to sound dignified when hopping around with his tijori on display but Abhi thought he was doing an admirable job.

 

"Argh!" She stretched and he felt his senses stand to attention again. "Since when did you become so responsible?" Since I didn't have you to take care of me. "And what punctuality are you talking about? There's no flight to catch and I highly doubt you would have scheduled a meeting before the afternoon."

 

"Yes I know we don't have to catch a flight but who knows how the traffic will be and the government officer is coming at two!"

 

She sat bolt upright. Shit.

 

"What?"

 

"Nothing! I mean, I have some work at two. Some producers are coming to talk to me about my latest album, you must have heard about it - "

 

"You've always been a terrible liar. Tell me what is going on."

 

He scuttled along the perimeter of the room but there was no way she could avoid her piercing gaze. "Well...I don't want to get him in trouble with your family but Purab let it slip the other day."

 

"I haven't even told Bulbul that they're finally unlocking Kumkum Bhagya so Purab has no idea. How did you know about this!"

 

Busted.

 

The dawning expression on her face was akin to horror. "It was you, wasn't it?" She whispered, "You cleared the paper work against Kumkum Bhagya. You arranged to have it opened."

 

He could only nod silently. Suddenly, the mood in the room changed. The warm sunlight became oppressive as her face twisted rapidly. He wanted to do nothing more than to take her into his arms and soothe her quivering lips but the between them were back.

 

She opened her mouth to say something but he stopped her. Words were too formal, too final. Not yet.

 

"It's getting late. Get ready for the journey," he said brusquely and walked out, leaving her staring after him in her gigantic blanket.

 

 

Pragya leaned against the headrest and gazed restlessly at her reflection in the car window. To her surprise, she looked no different from yesterday. Her face showed no trace of the monumental events of the previous night. Her body on the other hand...She flushed and tugged her dupatta closer to her neck to hide the evidence of her husband's ardour. Had he noticed? No, he too was staring out of the window, thinking about god-knows-what.

 

He had been uncharacteristically silent the entire drive. He leaned over only once to whisper in her ear, "Are you okay?"

 

Are you okay? How could she answer that? She had broken every rule she had ever made for herself and all she wanted was to do it all again. She had just given herself, body and soul; to her husband. The one man she had sworn never to let in again. She had allowed him to touch her core and brand her body. And she had enjoyed it.

 

In fact she had enjoyed it so much that she had even forgotten that the marriage hall was opening today. How could she have forgotten the day her entire family had been waiting for? All after one night of (admittedly mind-blowing) sex? She closed her eyes in shame. But still she could not bring herself to regret it.

 

"Pragya! Pragya, wake up! We've reached. " She felt Abhi's gentle hand on her shoulder and awoke to find the car stopped a couple of houses away from hers.

 

"Already? Why did you stop here?"

 

"Go, your family must be waiting for you. It's better if no one sees my car near your house."

 

So this was it, goodbye? She grabbed his wrist. "I want you to come with me for the opening."

 

"What? Are you crazy? Have you thought about what Ma and Rockstar Dadi will say if they see me?"

 

She looked directly into his eyes. "I don't care. If Kumkum Bhagya is opening today, it's only because of you. I want you to be there."

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


AN: Thank you for reading! I'm sorry for SUCH a late update, but if you've gotten here, thank you for sticking with this story. As always, please leave your reviews, they mean a lot. And buddy for PMs. πŸ˜Š

 

Edited by putturani - 9 years ago
Fanaah thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
U/R

For: PART 6 - REVELATIONS

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! O.M.F.G. YAY! An update! πŸ₯³

Rani-saaa, you don't know how eagerly I'm been waiting for the this update... Probably just as eagerly as you were waiting for me to unres all my reses!

*LOL*

I liked seeing Abhi vulnerable and unsure about the morning after because mornings tend to illuminate that which has been knowingly hidden during the night. I felt for him - when he was savoring the vision of her in front of him, when he was trying to hold-on to the feelings she awoke in him, the sense of peace her actions provided and the fear of loosing her when he draped his leg over and held her to his chest, but the fact that he was preparing himself to let go regardless should she give even the slightest inclination truly shows how much of a changed man he is.

And the best part is when she DID wake-up, there was no awkwardness, no regrets. They were some teasing snark and play fighting and familiarity, even in its smallest degree, makes me feel hopeful for their future.

Then finding-out about his hand in clearing out the KKB marriage hall - he will never not be a hero. It was emotional and tense and there is still slight uncertainty, to say or not to say and WHAT to say.

And the drive. Pragya's introspection about the changes she went through. She IS a changed woman, mentally, emotionally... There is another layer that has been added. She seems more strong now, willing to stand-up for herself, strong enough to make decisions and bear their consequences - I'm glad she decided that she didn't regret anything that happened and when Abhi was unwilling to let her family see him, took a stand and forced him to meet them because he deserves that recognition. This is so different from how she was initially. I said before that their personalities have switched where she is strong enough herself now to be able to support herself while also lending him the strength to move forward.

I hope the things slowly get resolved in the future. It will be interesting to see how they'll mesh together with all the new and different changes.

What a place to stop, Rani-sa! I LIKE this assertive Pragya. Oh, how much we've been wishing for it. I hope it continues and she doesn't fall emotionally weak before her family, which is something we've been seeing too much of in the show.

Eagerly waiting for the next update, Rani-sa!
Edited by Fanaah - 9 years ago
Miss.M thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
RES!!!

OMG I need to go back and unres the rest of my previous comment as well!!
Fanaah thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
Rani-sa, forgive me but this reply will be extremely long since the previous comments are also included!


Pri!! Did I ever tell you thank you for un-resing all of this so diligently? πŸ€— I think I mentioned how he found out about the MMS no? At the end of Endings Pragya throws some wrenches into Abhi's logic as for why she can't be responsible and that gets him thinking. He then confronts Mitali bhabhi and she cracks. Sorry if that wasn't too clear.

*LOL* Yes Rani-sa, you were quite appreciative to my efforts of new commenting AND unressing all the resses! I believe you DID mention it, but I wanted to see more of the story between Abhi-Aliya-Tanu. I did guess that Mithali would be the easiest to crack.


Thank you Pri! You ever saw Princess Bride? I mighhtt have lifted a line from there πŸ˜³

*OMG* HAHAHAHAHA. I want to see it again after this! πŸ˜ƒ


YESS!! I intended for those two scenes to layer over each other! πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒ Maybe I should have collapsed Endings and Vulnerable into one fic but this part of the story was so dear to me I just had to have it on it's own.

Somehow it ended up a lot darker than even I expected but I'm glad you're just as twisted as me and liked it. πŸ˜† Thank you for your detailed feedback Pri!

Birds of a feather, Love. Birds of a feather is what we are, especially our mindscape. It was quite thrilling, being a woman myself and being considered weaker than the opposite sex, to see Pragya in a dominant role, at least in this way. Considering the circumstances, I don't think you could've made it fluffy. This story needs the grays or it would never work! Getting back to Pragya, she is not necessarily weak, per say, in the show, but her weaknesses and vulnerabilities are shown outward for everyone else to see. I understand that as a species, females tend to be emotional, but they suppressed personality to such a degree that as a woman in modern society, it ticks me the fu🀬k off. They're probably trying to attract the families belonging to old-school thought, but still... *sighs in resignation and shrugs*


πŸ˜† I love your perfectly-timed snorts. Thank you! That's the entire Bhagya in this, isn't it?

*LOL* Thank you, Love. It's a gift! πŸ˜‰ And yes.


Thank you Pri! πŸ˜ƒ More important were the feelings than the physical stuff, although I can imagine that stuff was pretty fun too. πŸ˜† The Chashmish part was one of my faves too and now mirrors the show too because Abhi only calls her Pragya nowadays. πŸ˜‘ Updating soon!

More than being fun, I believe the physical aspect was necessary because it is a HUGE part of their relationship. By GOD, they had the attraction, but the physicality was lacking in a relationship where they were husband and wife and this was always used in a negative manner! To tear down that door and cross over to the other side was a necessary step for them, so while I had fun reading what you had fun writing, I'm more grateful for them for overcoming a part of their relationship that always led to misunderstandings, pain, anger and a myriad of other negative feelings. 

Edited by Fanaah - 9 years ago
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