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Thoughts on Love: Nandu v/s Manik (Page 2)

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:01am | IP Logged
Originally posted by 13thwish

The thing is when Nandu started to fall in love with Manik (after she she discovered that he was 'not a monster), that part of their story is pretty idyllic.. They were hidden away from the world, lost in their own bubble and it was comfortable and private.. he was 'simply Manik' with her and she got to see his best side.. so it was easy for her to believe that this is what it's going to be like to fall in love and be with him..

But the first break up was a rude awakening for her..he seemed to have reverted to his monster self and she was left questioning her own judgment..once the truth was revealed, she felt anger and hurt of course, but also a certain amount of relief that she was not totally wrong about the man she thought him to be.. which is why she even comes down after dropping that scarf..  

Nandu is idealistic but she is not impractical.. his monster side doesn't scare her.. in fact she has embraced and accepted that aspect of him too.. Like during the revenge plan, she didn't expect him to suddenly change his ways and become all sensible and respectable, she just tried to tame the monster and keep him from going over the edge..

Also, Nandu is very aware of Manik's capacity to love deeply, selflessly and unconditionally.. she has seen it in action with all of Fab5 and especially with Dhruv.. in fact, that was the very reason she even started to have a change of heart about him in spite of his monster facade with her..
She even understood his reasons for the 'sacrifice'.. she never held that against him.. what hurt her was that he made the decision himself without 'sharing' it with her..his leaving her alone broke her heart not the thought process behind it..
So she doesn't really doubt the feelings.. she knows they are real and intense.. she questions whether they are a good influence on each other.. especially after the hospital drama.. she feels that they bring out the worst, the reckless side of each other.. and she wonders if long term they will end up hurting each other more in their stubbornness rather than making each other happy..

But what this track will bring her to realize is that for better or worse, they are IT for each other. The heart wants what it wants and it has already made its choice. Once she faces that being apart hurts worse than any other pain (just as he did during the sacrifice track), then she will be willing to take the risk.. sure their life together will not be 'ideal'.. but the truth is, she doesn't want it to be either.. If she did, then she would have picked Dhruv and they would have lived happily ever after.. but she didn't.. she chose Manik.. because she loves who she is with him.. she just can't see it yet because like Abhi said today, "she is trying to analyze it all logically". But if she stops doing that and just goes with her instinct which she eventually did (when she landed up at his house) then everything will fall into place for them and they will invariably find their way to each other like always..

Okay wow, did not intend on a such a long replyEmbarrassed




I love long replies, man!LOL  Thanks for pitching in! 

I agree with the points you've made...

Nandu isn't trying to deny Manik's monster side...yes she is aware of it, sees beyond all that to the goodness within him, true...but again everything comes back to "It all happened TOO SOON"...We forget that Nandu is still a naive, innocent soul in many ways...she knew his monstrous sides but she still had an ideal vision of THEIR LOVE thanks to the fireflies and just that first initial heady high of newfound love.

She first took a hit when Manik shattered her trust...she never really recovered from it and the pain just kept rolling in, increasing with each new incident...even after finding out the truth, it didn't lessen.

This PAIN is new to Nandu...unlike anything she had ever thought possible when there is LOVE...she thought she knew the monster but she didn't know the scope and level of pain that can come from loving THAT deeply...I think it's the DEPTH of this pain and her feelings for him that overwhelm her and make her question her judgement more.

It's easy to SAY things like "If it doesn't hurt, it's not love"...but to actually LIVE the pain is another thing...that is the lesson she is learning now.

Nandu's HEART is her biggest strength...that is what gives her the capacity to have so much compassion...she's such a strong and courageous girl otherwise...but she will need to find some more courage in her heart to accept the truth of this love...that her heart has chosen as you rightly said...it wants what it wants and she has to accept the package deal...the joy and the pain...and all the mess that comes with it.

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:06am | IP Logged
Originally posted by -bharti-

This is where nandini confuses me,  You remember she said to cabir if it doesnt hurt it isnt luv ?  these little inconsistencies throws me off from the pic i try to make of nandini.  Maybe she,s too small to make these statements cause you are bound to view things differently as you grow up n experience more.  
Anu i know you from laagi times n always enjoyed reading your perceptives,  you will do a service if you can write moreWink


LOL I just spoke about that dialogue in the reply above as well...this is a case similar to Manik's...you might recall him giving gyaan to Cabir in one epi saying, "If it's true love, you can't just leave it INCOMPLETE like that"LOL...and what did our fav. gadha do when he pulled the "Mission Nandini Murthy "drama on her?  He was totally contradicting his own preaching to Cabir...but there it is.

Similarly it's easy for Nandu to give gyaan to Cabir but when it comes to actually applying it to herself, she sidesteps...and Cabir did call her out on it in that scene also...he said,"look who's talking"...and Nandu had a guilty look on her faceLOL


It's human nature...we are all a bit hypocritical in nature...cuz it's easy to tell other ppl to do things but we lack the distance from ourselves to see how we are going against our own sayings.

I think what they are trying to show is that they are all still very young kids who are just about beginning to figure out life, love and relationships...they can't possibly have all the answers at THIS stage in their lives...so they struggle, make mistakes.


Edited by AreYaar - 26 December 2014 at 9:16am

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:14am | IP Logged
Nandini is a girl who will capture fireflies and wait for them to glow because they represented not just  the love her mother promised but something very untainted her parents' memories . The child her made them her ideals and she has always tried living up to their standards, so somewhere all her actions, upbringing , thoughts go towards them. They are her reference point to life.
So when in the first episode a stranger helps save her fireflies who glow in-return ,she becomes happy, hopeful and she captures the back of the stranger in her mind. Pretty illogical for a Science girl, right? But that is the thing , Nandini never made love logical, even now , she always held it in a very idealistic manner. Because as the outsider to her parents' story, she loved and wanted what they shared. Very natural and normal. 

Now , Manik the monster infuriated her, he represented everything she thought was wrong , yet the more she saw of him, greater was the pull. because somewhere she could see that this Monster had a side which was so similar to hers. They both feel and perceive similar emotions, morally are very attuned just the processing of it differs. This made her so curious, he became that mystery and she took to unveiling him.

The moment he was just himself, she was happy. It was simple, he listened to her, they were always on the same page and pretty much oblivious to each others' world . Somewhere the lines blurred and in her mind the real Manik was the only person that existed. But it's not like she disapproves of his Monster side, no she understands it so well and won't mind it much. But when he lied to her and broke her heart, the shock of his monster side, unhinged her. She was taken aback because she sort of had blanked out the monster him. 

His lie is particular , not much his monster , broke her. Because that lie destroyed the only illogical idealistic hope she has carried over the years. Her parents' version of love was all happy for that child. But here even with the fireflies glowing all she experienced was this immense sense of betrayal , pain and hurt. So her this experience didn't match with her point of reference which is why she is confused and unsure. She thinks because her parents' love was real , what they feel or bring to each other must be wrong.

Unfortunately , she is still the very child trapped in her parents' memories hence she struggles in understanding the depth of this emotion that she shares with Manik. This is love to her but it comes with pain. She needs to understand that immense happiness can only be experienced when there is realization of a certain amount of hurt.  The joy of being with him even for a  second is enough to compensate the pain of their separation.

I feel she needs to hear what she brings to Manik's life, the guilt about the pain is too much in her. So when she flashbacks to her promising him to shine forever, she is questioning herself what she brings to his dark world? Manik needs to acknowledge her importance in his life and vice-versa, because he too struggles to know what he means to her , what he brings to her life. Is he capable enough to make her happy, smile? 

They both are battling similar emotions and confusion , just that they both need to pour their hearts out to each other . This will give them the courage knowing that they matter and are essential together. 

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:25am | IP Logged
Originally posted by AreYaar


I love long replies, man!LOL  Thanks for pitching in!  

I agree with the points you've made...

Nandu isn't trying to deny Manik's monster side...yes she is aware of it, sees beyond all that to the goodness within him, true...but again everything comes back to "It all happened TOO SOON"...We forget that Nandu is still a naive, innocent soul in many ways...she knew his monstrous sides but she still had an ideal vision of THEIR LOVE thanks to the fireflies and just that first initial heady high of newfound love.

She first took a hit when Manik shattered her trust...she never really recovered from it and the pain just kept rolling in, increasing with each new incident...even after finding out the truth, it didn't lessen.

This PAIN is new to Nandu...unlike anything she had ever thought possible when there is LOVE...she thought she knew the monster but she didn't know the scope and level of pain that can come from loving THAT deeply...I think it's the DEPTH of this pain and her feelings for him that overwhelm her and make her question her judgement more.

It's easy to SAY things like "If it doesn't hurt, it's not love"...but to actually LIVE the pain is another thing...that is the lesson she is learning now.

Nandu's HEART is her biggest strength...that is what gives her the capacity to have so much compassion...she's such a strong and courageous girl otherwise...but she will need to find some more courage in her heart to accept the truth of this love...that her heart has chosen as you rightly said...it wants what it wants and she has to accept the package deal...the joy and the pain...and all the mess that comes with it.

I agree with the 'too soon' part but the thing is, that was the only way it could have happened between these two.. for one, there was the overwhelming attraction plus even as people they are so made for each other that the pull was inevitable.. Neither of them (but especially Manik) are the type to slowly and steadily fall in love with each other..
Nandu in her head thinks she is, but she really is not..she loves Monster Manik and his wicked ways and loves being Fighter Nandini with him even more.. how miserable and broken she was when she lost that.. even a simple act like wearing her earrings felt torturous to her..

You are right about the PAIN.. it is clouding her judgment.. but that's the irony isn't it? The very fact that it hurts THIS MUCH in spite of 'never having begun' (her words) is a clear indication of how deep those feelings are.. but she hasn't made that connection yet.. she thinks the 'pain' is a symptom that it's not right when it's clearly the way around.. it's the loss that is painful because it is 'too right' to live without..

the courage she needs will come from him.. he will bring it out in her like he always has.. this is the dance they have perfected.. she runs and he pursues.. but as soon as he steps away, she immediately calls out for him.. that is why, the minute he stopped following and became silent with her, her tears stopped.. she was distracted by his absence and then all her energies were refocused on being in his orbit again.. Now with Soha's entry, it's only giving her an additional impetus to mark her territory and declare her ownership of him.. eventually, he will become her sole focus and then all the past hurts and fear won't be able to hold her back anymore.. because being with him will be all that matters.. for both their sakes..  

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:31am | IP Logged
For Nandini , now she is logically evaluating things,
She has read/heard: "it's not love, if it doesn't hurt". 2)- fireflies glow in presence of true love.

But what she has actually seen is the happy blissful world of her parents, which she has wanted for herself , all these years. 

So she compares what she has heard to what she has actually witnessed, that is why she is messed up. The contradiction comes from the fact that she refuses to internalize what she feels, they share because in her head only "what her parents shared" was true love.  

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:44am | IP Logged
Originally posted by charminggenie

For Nandini , now she is logically evaluating things,
She has read/heard: "it's not love, if it doesn't hurt". 2)- fireflies glow in presence of true love.

But what she has actually seen is the happy blissful world of her parents, which she has wanted for herself , all these years. 

So she compares what she has heard to what she has actually witnessed, that is why she is messed up. The contradiction comes from the fact that she refuses to internalize what she feels, they share because in her head only "what her parents shared" was true love.  

Add to that she has a child's view/perspective of this.. obviously her parents, no matter how much they were in love had their own share of good and bad days which their young daughter wouldn't have witnessed.. so she remembers only their good times..

Also, memory is a funny thing.. it blunts the edges of hurt.. smoothens out the wrinkles and makes everything seem idealistic.. from this distance of ten years, her parents and her life with them are a vision of perfection.. the 'ideal'.. which her reality is anything but that.. it is harsh and filled with overwhelming, conflicting emotions and her heart belongs to an unpredictable, volatile man.. it is this contrast that scares her and she is trying to retreat from it all for now just to safeguard herself from being hurt again..

It was just a protective reflex but now she is gradually finding her feet and the courage to face it all head on..    

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 9:56am | IP Logged
Originally posted by charminggenie


I feel she needs to hear what she brings to Manik's life, the guilt about the pain is too much in her. So when she flashbacks to her promising him to shine forever, she is questioning herself what she brings to his dark world? Manik needs to acknowledge her importance in his life and vice-versa, because he too struggles to know what he means to her , what he brings to her life. Is he capable enough to make her happy, smile? 

They both are battling similar emotions and confusion , just that they both need to pour their hearts out to each other . This will give them the courage knowing that they matter and are essential together. 


This.

Yes, if Nandini is somewhere looking for that reassurance from him...she wants HIM to DENY that they can only give each other pain...she wants him to prove her wrong like he once wanted her to prove him wrong when he was pulling that fake breakup on her...

But Manik isn't giving her that reassurance cuz he holds back MUCH more than she does...he isn't even able to admit to himself yet, what will he tell her?

Both of them are simply waiting for the OTHER to make the first moveLOL

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 10:03am | IP Logged
Originally posted by 13thwish


I agree with the 'too soon' part but the thing is, that was the only way it could have happened between these two.. for one, there was the overwhelming attraction plus even as people they are so made for each other that the pull was inevitable.. Neither of them (but especially Manik) are the type to slowly and steadily fall in love with each other..
Nandu in her head thinks she is, but she really is not..she loves Monster Manik and his wicked ways and loves being Fighter Nandini with him even more.. how miserable and broken she was when she lost that.. even a simple act like wearing her earrings felt torturous to her..

You are right about the PAIN.. it is clouding her judgment.. but that's the irony isn't it? The very fact that it hurts THIS MUCH in spite of 'never having begun' (her words) is a clear indication of how deep those feelings are.. but she hasn't made that connection yet.. she thinks the 'pain' is a symptom that it's not right when it's clearly the way around.. it's the loss that is painful because it is 'too right' to live without..

the courage she needs will come from him.. he will bring it out in her like he always has.. this is the dance they have perfected.. she runs and he pursues.. but as soon as he steps away, she immediately calls out for him.. that is why, the minute he stopped following and became silent with her, her tears stopped.. she was distracted by his absence and then all her energies were refocused on being in his orbit again.. Now with Soha's entry, it's only giving her an additional impetus to mark her territory and declare her ownership of him.. eventually, he will become her sole focus and then all the past hurts and fear won't be able to hold her back anymore.. because being with him will be all that matters.. for both their sakes..  


Oh ofcourse I agree it couldn't have been any other way...the kind of personalities they are, the helpless attraction b/w them...it was bound to happen the way it did...and they were tested before their time...poor kids.

And yes, the very fact that it hurts THIS MUCH is very telling of the nature of these feelings...she is misinterpreting the pain as you said...she thinks it's a RESULT of the two of them being together...but in actuality the pain results from the lack of RESOLUTION...the unresolved issues/questions b/w them...Is this true love? If so, where are the fireflies? Does she still trust him? Will she ever be able to trust him like she used to? Can they go back to the way they were? Will he ever admit his love to her? These questions have not been answered properly b/w them...this pain is of UNFINISHED BUSINESS.


@bold: Perfectly described! That is the dance they've perfected indeed...I'm reminded of the drunken episodes when in the middle of her, "Manik is a FOOL" drama queen antics, the moment she loses him, instantly she's restless and searching for him again...and he shows up and asks her, "Toh phir ab kyun dhoond rahi ho, mujhe?"

That is them in a nutshell...she can fight and scream and rant all she wants about how much she hates his monster side but that is what she THRIVES on...it's brings out the fire in her like nothing else...like moth to a flame they are then.

So yes, yet again, the moment he stopped chasing her, her focus shifted from the tears to finding him again, seeking him outLOL

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