Ek Veer Ki Ardaas - Veera

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Ek Veer Ki Ardaas - Veera
Ek Veer Ki Ardaas - Veera

~VeeBa SS~ Phir Dil Tod Dia (Part 3 added)

mehwishk13 Senior Member
mehwishk13
mehwishk13

Joined: 23 October 2014
Posts: 213

Posted: 26 December 2014 at 1:33am | IP Logged
Hey guys! This is my first ever VeeBa writing so plz give reviews and say whether I should continue or not Smile it's on the current track of Nihal's murderCry.. Feel free to give any writing style feedback Wink ok so here it goes...

Want a PM for the updates?..

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

~veeba4eva

Edited by veeba4eva - 28 December 2014 at 8:59pm

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Asyalover

mehwishk13 Senior Member
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Joined: 23 October 2014
Posts: 213

Posted: 26 December 2014 at 1:58am | IP Logged
Part 1


The wedding day has finally come for VeeBa and everyone is super happy! Wedding songs are playing and it's full shaadi mahol!

Ranvi barges in the house in extreme anger and says "Band karo ye naach gaana! Yaha koi shaadi nahi hogi!"

Veera who was silently sitting like a dulhan comes to Ranvi and says "ye aap kya keh rahe hai veerji? Aap esa kyun keh rahe hai?" Her voice starts to crack as she says "Ky-kya hua?"

"Meri baat kaan khol ke sun le Veera! Me tab bhi Baldev ke bare me sahi tha aur ab bhi sahi hoon! Tera aur uska vyah kabhi nahi ho sakta!"

Veera is now clearly crying and says in between tears "par veerji hua kya hai!? Aap aisa kyun keh rahe hai!?"

"Kyunke Baldev ko giraftaar kiya gaya hai... Khoon ke ilzaam me!"

Ratan suddenly speaks up "kh-khoon? kiska khoon?"

Ranvi's voice quietens down as he says "Nihal Chachu ka.. Aur is haadse ka me chashmadeed gawah hoon.."

Ratan's eyes open wide in shock and the life seems to have left her body. She starts to feel dizzy and faints to the floor.

Veera who was in shock by the sudden revelation screams "Nahi! Nahi! Esa nahi ho sakta! Nihal chachu nahi mar sakte! Wo nahi mar sakte! Unho ne to mera gatbandhan karna hai.. Wo nahi mar sakte.. Aur Baldev? Wo to unhe kabhi nahi maar sakta! Use to pata hai Nihal Chachu mere liye kya maine rakhte hai.. Wo unhe kabhi chot nahi pohuncha sakta... Wo mujhe kabhi chot nahi pohuncha sakta... Nahi! Nahi!" Veera crumples to the ground helplessly while crying profusely.

Ranvi who can't see her in such state rushes over to her and tries to give her a hug to console her but Veera pushes him away and stands up. "Dur rahiye veerji! Mujhe haat bhi may lagaiyega!" And then she starts murmuring to herself and moving back towards the front door. "Mera Baldev beguna hai.. Usne khoon nahi kia.. Wo dara dhamka sakta hai par kisi ka khoon nahi kar sakta.. Nahi! Wo kisi ko nahi mar sakta!" Saying this she wipes her tears with the back of her hand carelessly, turns around and runs out of the house and to the police station to her to-be husband.

Precap: Veera comes to the police station but Rajveer doesn't let her meet Baldev.


~veeba4eva[/b]
Next Part


Edited by veeba4eva - 26 December 2014 at 3:46pm

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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 3:23am | IP Logged
Nice start!
Do continue soon Big smile

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mehwishk13

Nikki36 IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 26 December 2014 at 7:43am | IP Logged
Excellent start, do carry on writing.   Look forward to chapter 2.

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mehwishk13

mehwishk13 Senior Member
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Posts: 213

Posted: 26 December 2014 at 3:34pm | IP Logged
Previous Part


Part 2


Baldev is sitting on the bench by the wall behind the bars.


Suddenly he hears "mujhe Baldev se milne dijiye.. please.." And then he hears a girl crying.

The girl is none other than Veera and Baldev doesn't take long to realize that. He rushes up to the bars as soon as he hears her and calls out "Veera!"

Veera instantly looks in the direction of the voice and starts to run towards him but the constables stop her from going forward. Again she says "Dekhiye please mujhe Baldev se milne dijiye.. Please.."

By this time Rajveer comes and sees her crying. He secretly smiles his evil smile and puts on a face of sympathy.

He comes to her and says "Are Veera Ji aap yaha? ...Buhot afsos hua ye sun ke ki aapki shaadi toot gayi"

Baldev who had been listening with burning anger and clenched fists yells "Oye! Shaadi tooti nai hai! Tu kaun hota hai ae kehne wala!?"

"Baldev apni zabaan sambhal ke baat karo! Tum pehle hi salakho ke peeche ho! Esa kuch mat karna jis se tumhe aur kadi saza mile!"

Veera folds her hands in front of her and pleads to Rajveer "Rajveer Ji please mujhe Baldev se ek baar milne dijiye.. Bas ek baar"

"Veera tenu iske saamne haath jodne ki koi zarurat nahi!"

But Veera ignores Baldev and stands her ground. Rajveer holds her hands to bring it down while secretly smiling evilly which infuriates Baldev and Rajveer says "Nahi nahi Veera Ji.. Aap esa mat keejiye.. Waise aapka milna mushkil hai par me aapko zyada se zyada sirf 5 mint de sakta hoon milne ke liye"

Veera smiles through tears and says "Shukriya! Shukriya!" And runs over to Baldev.

Baldev holds onto the bars with a faint smile when he sees her coming.

"Baldev..." She says and cries. Baldev tries to wipe her tears with his thumb from between the bars but she holds onto his hand and hugs it.

"Veera dekh tu, tu to mat.. Tujhe to pata hai na menu acha nai lagta jab tu roti hai.. Aur mene Nihal Chachu ko nahi maara.. Wo to me-"

He's cut off my Veera who is still crying but not as badly as before as she says "Baldev me jaanti hoon ke tune Chachu ko nahi maara.. Tu kabhi kisi ki jaan nai le sakta. Waise.. Tujhe chachu kaha mile the? To kidhar gaya-"

Rajveer who'd obviously been listening to their conversation interrupts before Baldev can say anything and says "Time up! Veera Ji, ab aap ko jana ho ga."

"Ji me aati hoon" and then she turns to Baldev and says "me tujhe jald hi yaha se nikal loongi.. Tu fikar mat karna.. Meri shaadi tere siwa aur kisi ke saath nahi ho gi" she smiles and turns to leave but Baldev holds her hand to stop her and whispers to her so Rajveer can't hear "Veera mera phone mere ghar pe hai. Uske messages me check karna-"

"Chaliye madam" the lady constable says to her almost pulling her away.

"Veera bas apna khyaal rakhna" Baldev says quickly. And she says "Tu bhi" and then she's taken away.

Precap:
Someone- lekin tujhe unse ese baat nahi karni chahiye thi
Veera- ab tu mujhe sikhayegi!?


~veeba4eva
Next Part


Edited by veeba4eva - 29 December 2014 at 4:27am

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khushi_shankarsanjanabaldev...Jammy...sonmuskzainabawoonNikki36Krazzy4u786Asyalovervinu24-BeingMuslimah-

mehwishk13 Senior Member
mehwishk13
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Joined: 23 October 2014
Posts: 213

Posted: 26 December 2014 at 5:10pm | IP Logged
Hey guys! If you want a pm for the updates then like this post Smile


P.S. BUDDY ME SO IT'S EASY FOR ME TO FIND YOU

~veeba4eva


Edited by veeba4eva - 27 December 2014 at 2:56am

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zainabawoon IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 27 December 2014 at 1:53am | IP Logged
Hey read both parts together, it was awesome! continue soonBig smile

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mehwishk13

sonmusk Goldie
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Posts: 1725

Posted: 27 December 2014 at 11:16am | IP Logged
Who's the unknown woman,somebody is back nw. Nice updates!

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mehwishk13

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