I have too many points to discuss. Lets divide them first.
A) Daya keeps Mahila mandal and others before Jetha ( if not family)
I stand to this point. We have seen this before. Examine these incidents.
1. Shouting from the balcony : Why can't a few facts and stories remain between husband and wife only. She has been told thousand times not to do. She is a habitual offender in this case.
2. Kerry track: She doubts husband okay but why should that be made a news ?
3. Anjali's interference: Why does she allow Anjali interfere in her marital affairs ?
4. Computer track: Madhavi said Jetha wanted commission and therefore she accused her husband openly ?
5.Roti maker track: Why does she need to poke her nose there ? They will or they will not buy should have been Jetha's jurisidicttion only.
6. Chaniya choli track: While Jetha is puzzled she ws serving food to these people at midnight and what worse she choose his shop to sell those chaniya cholis to help her brother. Pati gaya khadde me.
7. Send Jetha to help sundar: In a hotel of course where Sundar had come to attend his friend's marriage. Without a thought that it was 2 AM she sends him there. Why can't ladla bhai wait till the morning ?
And then there are thousand of such instances
B) Is Daya a good mother ? : I don't question her best wife title because her husband is no good anyways but I wonder what are the qualities of a good mother. If it means serving food to her children and loving them then she is indeed a good mother. However, planning his marriage, ignoring all complaints against him, not explaining him that he doesn't need a mobile now are qualtiies of a good mother ?
I have always asked what makes her an Adarsh Bharitya Nari ? Her culinary skills ? That's what the women of India are suppose to do in their life?
C) Is she responsible ?: With reference to this track as you say the situation was beyond her control . Yes it was but how many times will similar situation arise in her life. Lets count them
1. CID track. Food served to the wrong people
2. Aamras track: Food could not be sent because of the rotten mangoes. No news was sent. No other alternative was sent either
3. Bappa's murti track. She was caught in the shop and she didn't sent any information at home. Again, guests were invited.
ANd small instances are always there where Jetha doesn't get what he wants.
This situation, Aarti ,was not really an out of hand situation. Can we call her immature if not irresponsible ? She should have only called him to say the plan has been cancelled and can he order some food instead. Yes, he would have been disappointed but the situation would have been in control.
No one is taking her Annapurna title but we all have our own standards. When one achieves excellence in something then being mere good automatically becomes a matter of criticism. Upon the Homemaker's skills rests the prosperity of every family. neither can we take her for granted nor can she play around with her responsibility. Unfortunately this is the fact. Its not about cooking food at time only.It includes everything a homemaker does in her day to day schedule. Can you say Daya is a responsible woman in totality ?
The problem is actually the maker's confusion about what exactly is her character. One cannot be wise and stupid at the same time. One cannot be an expert and an amateur at the same time.
At times we need to choose between two things. That reminds of a poem called ,'The Road not taken' by Robert Frost.We cannot have the cake and eat it too. Both the makers and Daya needs to learn this.