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Discussion: Your opinion on Net Romance

SolidSnake IF-Rockerz

Joined: 12 January 2006
Posts: 6908

Posted: 10 September 2006 at 3:11am | IP Logged

GHAZIABAD: Boy meets girl, in an Internet chat room. They fall in love. Boy is Hindu, girl Muslim. Girl's family opposes marriage, threatens both, tries to take girl back to foreign land she came from. Girl in hospital, police in on the act.

Sounds like the storyline of the latest Bollywood romance? Well, it's all happening in neighbouring Ghaziabad. Subia Gaur, a Grade 13 student from London, and an NRI to boot, met Ghaziabad's Ashwini Gupta on the Net.

One chat session led to another, photographs were exchanged, and love blossomed. On August 17, Subia arrived in Ghaziabad to marry Ashwini, who is in the last leg of his chartered financial analyst's course.

Ashwini is son of an accounts executive at the local Rathee Supersteel plant, BB Gupta, who lives in Lajpatnagar in Sahibabad.

That's where things deviated from the happy route they had taken so far. According to Subia, her family is threatening both of them with dire physical harm if they marry.

She claims her marriage to Ashwini is being opposed because she is a Muslim and he a Hindu. And, she says her parents from London as well as her grandparents from Mumbai are trying to take her away forcefully.

The police has swung into action. According to Ghaziabad senior superintendent of police Piyush Mordia, "I have instructed the Sahibabad police to ensure that Subia's family or anybody else should be allowed to stop her from doing anything she wants, as an adult. Some relatives of hers tried to take her away, but we told them the girl is an adult and can stay where she wants, or marry whoever she wants to. We have appointed a constable to protect her."

Subia is, meanwhile, admitted to a Sahibabad hospital, as she is running a high fever. With a dextrose drip attached to her arm, the visibly scared girl told Times City: "I had come to Ghaziabad in April. Then my family took me away forcefully. Now I have come here again, without informing my parents or grandparents. But they are again trying to force me to return with them. I am very scared about what they could do. Please help us convince the police we need protection."


Such cases are happening with regular frequency these day, what do you think causes Net Romance? I mean without meeting the person (in person) can someone fall in love? What is your opinion on Net Romance? Do you think they are sustainable? And in the above mentioned case, do you support the girl?

Moderator's Note:
Interesting Disccusion!  Lets open it up to the whole forum!!!

Edited by Diva - 12 September 2006 at 2:18pm

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:


insouciance IF-Rockerz

Joined: 10 January 2006
Posts: 6874

Posted: 10 September 2006 at 7:20am | IP Logged
nice to see you back Iron ji Smile
jprasad IF-Rockerz

Joined: 27 October 2004
Posts: 6974

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 2:22pm | IP Logged
Net romance??? That is how I met my hubby.... Embarrassed

I would not recommend net romance to anyone who is under the age of 18 or whatever the legal age is in your country. There are a lot of weirdos out there and you don't want to get stuck in a sticky situation. If you decide to pursue net romance then make sure you practice caution.

I did meet someone once who had a net romance for over two years without meeting the person. Completely dedicated net romance. I couldn't really digest that one.   LOL
simple666 Senior Member

Joined: 29 June 2006
Posts: 726

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 3:20pm | IP Logged
what i think about net romance is its stupid, boring and cant even be sure about the person...she/he maybe lieing to you...she/he probably flirts with you and has another gf/bf too...soo...i dun support this type of romance...
vijay Admin Group

Site Admin
Joined: 09 December 2003
Posts: 7192

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 3:44pm | IP Logged

I am of the opinion that "cyber romance" in its classical sense is a foolhardy thing to do unless and until one is ready for a committed relationship or marriage. I think it's infinitely better to consider a new person in your life a FRIEND, rather than a life partner, until such time as you've observed them in group situations for a while. I think it's far safer to conduct a social life with a group of friends instead of being paired as couple straight away.

One thing that is common in 95% Cyber Romance is that it starts with Cyber Friendship. I have witnessed cases where just after 5-10 sessions of good chat people tend to think him/her as a good friend of yours. I request especially to gals, please dont misunderstand it. Dont be too fast; give such relationship a decent probation period and take it as a good acquaintance, then friendship and if you 200% sure of what you are getting yourself into then take the next step.... Embarrassed

It's even easier to cultivate the "romance" mindset on the cyberspace than in real world as its fast, safer, convenient and for some its cheaper as you dont have to buy real greeting cards (you can make her/him happy with free online egreetings too) LOL . Secondly, the "romance" mindset is as pervasively encouraged by the media and society at large as, say "A man and a woman can't really be JUST FRIENDS" - Ek ladka aur ek ladki kabhi SIRF dost nahin ho sakte (remember the famous Maine Pyar Kiya dialogue)-- Wink So the sense of "LOVE" sets in verrrrry fast.

I've heard from more than one person that they like Cyber romance because you get to know someone "from the outside in" so that physical appearances don't matter. Well, perhaps that's true, but in my experience, you also achieve too much emotional intimacy in too short a time when interacting online without meeting in person right away. That means that if you meet and there's no chemistry, you've given a big chunk of your innermost self to a stranger. And if you meet and there's even a little chemistry, many people will feel an obligation to move forward with the relationship despite any misgivings. And such relationship begun out of obligation is no bargain in my opinion.

I dont know how much I have made sense but then I think many people don't want to hear about the drawbacks to Cyber Romance because they don't want to face the risks they are taking by opening themselves up to strangers.

Dont be disappointed.. Cyberspace is not full of Bad people there are good one's too..  its just that you have to chose the right one.. Embarrassed

Edited by vijay - 12 September 2006 at 4:43pm
Angeleyes 2 IF-Sizzlerz
Angeleyes 2
Angeleyes 2

Joined: 02 June 2005
Posts: 11455

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 3:45pm | IP Logged
love comes in all forms, shapes and size but personally I don't believe in net dating but I do think u can fall in love without seeing the person. sometimes u can just feel that they are close to u but yet far even though u have never seen them before. They are alot of frauds on the net today and u shouldn't trust anyone to do such thing unless u have met the person from a friend or family.
teenindia_usa IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 27 February 2005
Posts: 10569

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 4:00pm | IP Logged

Originally posted by Angeleyes 2

love comes in all forms, shapes and size but personally I don't believe in net dating but I do think u can fall in love without seeing the person. sometimes u can just feel that they are close to u but yet far even though u have never seen them before. They are alot of frauds on the net today and u shouldn't trust anyone to do such thing unless u have met the person from a friend or family.

YES, one may seek someone. Yet one should take it slow, esp net romance since many things not known. I agree ucan luv someone without seeing them. Yet u should takke it slow. Take it as u would when u go thru matrimonials.

If its a serious relation involve others, let them know too, take as u would a matrimonal match.

on other side:

One has tobecareful many weird people out there and say things. never meet the person alone since u not know who and how they are. Jusybeacuse u have talked etc..if meeting personbe not disclose too much..etc..



Edited by teenindia_usa - 13 September 2006 at 6:58am
~2pac_fan###~ Newbie

Joined: 12 September 2006
Posts: 2

Posted: 12 September 2006 at 4:02pm | IP Logged
very nice topic !
i found this on web india news few days ago....

Two Indian girls arrested at LoC
Jammu | May 14, 2006 6:15:16 PM IST

Two lovelorn Indian girls who tried to cross the line of control (LoC) in Jammu and Kashmir to meet their Pakistani boyfriends were arrested by the army and later let off.

Asha Patel of Mumbai and Asha Sharma of Haldwani in Nanital, Uttar Pradesh, were arrested at Chakan da Bagh - the last Indian point on the LoC in Poonch - on Rawlakote road when they tried to cross over to the Pakistani side where their boyfriends waited for them Saturday.

Army officials said that Patel, 24, and Sharma, 22, got acquainted with Khalid Mumtaz and his brother, who live in Lahore, via the Internet.

Patel claimed they had even "solemnised their marriage" through the Internet. After the Internet chatting, she said, they spoke regularly on phone and had decided to marry.

The couples had first tried the legal route to happily-ever-after, but the denial of visas by the Pakistan embassy disappointed them. Next, they thought, they could try to travel across to the other side as a historic bus service had been started between the two countries.

After a stay at a local hotel - Anand Hotel - in Poonch, Patel and Sharma took an auto-rickshaw to the LoC.

Last year, Patel and Khalid had decided to meet at the Wagah border in Amritsar, Punjab, Patel told her interrogators.

The girls had reached the Wagah border and the Border Security Force (BSF) and the Pakistan Rangers allowed them to meet each other after repeated requests, a statement the army and police are trying to verify.

Last month the two decided on the Internet to meet again and Khalid suggested that Patel and Sharma cross over through Chakan Da Bagh.

Police official S.D. Singh Jamwal told reporters that after verifying their antecedents and cross-checking with their families, the police and the army had decided to let the girls off.

(IANS) 884.html

Edited by ~2pac_fan###~ - 12 September 2006 at 4:02pm

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