Joined: 27 October 2004
Joined: 06 April 2005
wow!! that is a beautiful saying. my 1.5 yr old comes in 1st category yet i cannot trick her in some situations. one thing i have noticed is when us parents are inconsistent in punishments kids misbehave. i am guilty at that. so have changed my approach. i have spanked my daughter 2-3 times in the bottom. those times looking in the eyes, time outs, a swat NO..nothing worked. i have felt bad after that. i don't intent to continue that but i know sometimes it is inevitable.
Joined: 20 September 2004
I completely agree JP.
After every spanking, I do feel miserable,yes. But I give it some space and time. And then starts my reconciliation session (read petting and lecturing and hugging and all my wisdoms are greeted with enthusiastic nods and open wide hugs ). But in all that, what I really repeat is WHY I spanked them.I ask specifically ask them if they understood why they got the punishment. Even while spanking, I actually make them repeat after me that 'they are not going to repeat this' ,whatever it is. I also tell them how bad I feel when I spank them. So dialougue is very very important,probably even more important than the spanking itself. Spanking is just a way of making them get serious about any issue, so that they address the issue with more gravity than they otherwise would. I find them more open and receptive to what I am saying, and my hugs and kisses and praises take on more meaning than they normally would .
Though you are right about the generation. Often, when something went wrong in the office,the dads would come back home and scream at the wife, and hit the hapless kids. That is the kind of thing which we need to guard ourselves from. Probably the biggest pitfall is, sometimes a parent can resort to hitting simply as an easy way out. I have been guilty of it with my elder son, but thankfully I learnt that pretty soon, and of course I myself had some incidents from my childhood to draw from. So that is something I never ever do, and luckily my husband is very balanced in that way. He is one guy who never ever brings frustrations of office home, though he has had some enormous ones,as any one else. So it's a learning process.
Joined: 10 January 2006
Joined: 10 May 2005
Joined: 20 July 2006
Joined: 20 July 2006
i know it has made kids even more ziddi when u hit again and again.......[
yea that's sooo true. if u hit the kid.. they will b quiet n scared of u.. then one time they'll just b like all u can do is just hit me right.. then go ahead. my beo was used to hit me after a while i got tired n i was like "u only have the power of hitting. i must say u can do nutin accept hitting" n then he stopped..
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