Posted: 30 August 2013 at 7:36pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by viv04hi viv,
No matter how much I loved IPK and ASR as an mature audience, I worried about the impact of manhandling scenes on young minds. I would assume sensitive young teens not approving it and fear immature older teens being mislead by it.
In general, no matter how much couples are in love with each other and understand each other, even the tiniest unintentional arguments or verbal abuse can affect the relationship when it comes to physical intimacy for women. The issues need to be resolved and partner's mutual respect need to be restored on regular basis for healthy sustenance of long term relationship.
In spite of the inconsistent story, I would like to make sense of what was offered to us. Post kidnap rescue, maybe a verbal admittance of their love by ASR was necessary for K to start afresh, instill confidence and erase the hurtful memories. Maybe she would not have left RM for Anji's sake then. She had forgiven him long back, they had accepted each other and she even physically seemed to be ready for intimacy.
There is some gradual psychological resolution for K to farm house night if I want to make sense. She gets the answer in his teary eyes when he says, "tum ye sab hone dogi", then symbolic gifting on rakhee day, I love you dammit, apology at GH followed by visit to ma's garden and finally acknowledging her parents at farmhouse. In summary regardless of how much couples are in love, unlike men for women, their underlying psychological state is as important as their physical need or even more for attainment of desired level of intimacy.
I find answers to many questions in La's, "tum hi ho ek jo ASr se wo kah sakti ho jo wo nahi sunna chahte". Yes she was always drawn to him, did not want to give up on the raakshas inside him. Her love made her poke, prick, ruffle and dig into A's facades. His love for her compelled him to invite her to his inner chambers. Every time he hurt her, a piece of him cried for her love. And she would not miss to notice the tiny teary pools in his eyes that reflected his generous love for her as infinite as the ocean.
Yes there was no short cut for the broken soul ASR and this resulted in the great fiction we all love.
We are having such varied topics for discussion in all directions and I love all point of views for the joy of reading, communication and understanding.
lovely take on the psychological state being crucial to yielding to and liking the more sensual and sexual things. and yes, if we try hard to make sense of this story that post kidnap went where no one is quite sure (i used to routinely tell myself, life is like that, no track, random, so live with it and find meaning in the directionless), i too felt she needed to know he really cared for her, needed her.
and the high decibel di content at that point may have made khushi rush to the background once more as she tended to in her relationships (others happiness always being more important than hers)... he was the first person to tell her take me, own me as you like... but she had to be ready. i for one loved their fight after he accused her of being the cause of all trouble after di's abortion attempt... her terrible hurt, her passive aggression, his remorse and need, his hurt and that "aur main?" and the calling up of the contract again, felt like we were getting somewhere... there were lovely moments, some that build trust, some that scream love in between. that "i will take you back before the contract is over, " and "i won't go till that contract is over," both fighting to be loved. his talk of contract had really pricked... he of course did it because he felt there was no other way.
then the terrific 1 august fight after he's tried all sorts of things to get her back... tum yeh hone dogi, khushi. oh how much power he handed to her at that moment, only to take it back any way he could when she wouldn't relent. so human, lifelike... both.
then rakhee... dadi... him openly defying dadi and saying this is my wife, and where there's no place for my wife, there's none for me. she was smiling, happy, confident... he was joking about having children. after that, her suddenly jumping up from the bed that he's set up with so much love (his way of showing it) and saying there's been no pheras, so she is not his patni, uff i was confusia. especially, since this reaction had come after looking at radha krishna who certainly never had pheras and tell a different tale of love.
no point i know, story was being pushed around every second. trp gurus had said, we need weddingwa... glam sham show sha will bring the audience back and away we went on another mad sprint...
but i did love those trust and faith building sensitively handled scenes.
what la said, well pointed out, is a key to khushi and asr's connection. i wish there was something said about why khushi needed him so badly. he was not exactly sweet, yet she persevered. why? what was her need? or was she just a do gooder and would do this for anyone? i do hope that is not the case. there was that stunning soliloquy about how something grows in hate and more hate and yet becomes undeniable... it was powerful, as was her: this string i didn't take, it was put in my hands...and so i will do as needed.
yet, i felt there was no real thought given to why khushi couldn't live without him.
i have wondered why. is it because the story was really about asr and people forgot to put enough energy into her character, aside from those needed to attract a man like asr (second fiddle us)?
or is it that girls like to feel a bit superior... aah i cracked the code, i am indispensable, especially in a society where we are treated as less and feel powerless... and so it pleases the audience to see a triumphant woman essential to a very powerful man without even wanting to know why she put up with this arrogance and meanness, as long as she has been the source of releasing him, making him feel whole again. i have no idea. but makes me think.
there was an underlying thing of asr giving her a haq that no one had... i felt that unconditional love and haq was a huge thing for her, orphaned so young, almost every relationship had a bit of that "they did so much for me" in it, a certain shakiness perhaps deep within, but he gave her unstinting love just because she was who she was. i wish there was a clever line from nk or payal or someone to clarify this a bit.
Edited by indi52 - 31 August 2013 at 12:35am