Balika Vadhu

Saanchi and Sumitra win - Page 8

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ButterflyOnRose thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by: Missesha

Well said, Puja.


At this stage J has no clear rishta with G, but he has a specific rishta with Sa. She is his fiance while G is another woman as perceived by Sa, Sumi & society. 

Therefore, as claimed by J, if his rishta with G is only on humanitarian basis then there has to be some distance maintained, & priorities need to be established when it comes to choosing between Sa & G.

He cannot give all priorities to G over Sa, and if wants to do that then he needs to balance it. He also needs to consider Sa's emotions or her desires with respect to this relationship, since he said 'yes' to it. (I know Sa is mean and have no sympathies for her, but J does not know that). He cannot just outright ignore Sa. Engagement is a big occasion of a life-time for both bride & groom. It cannot be called off just like that or undermined because other-woman is his priority. It has to be balanced otherwise It is not fair on to-be fiance / wife. 


can i ask one question from you Esha didn't he tell her before mahurat was known to him i am going to Mangalore on 16th if he don't consider her for anything why he would telling her His idea was the planning she is doing for shopping etc she was asking him he answered once i come back then will do it but what she did ? its she who cheated  she knew it she didnt tell him that mahurat is on 16th  At one point you are saying rishta nibhana is not following each and everything other point you are saying he has to follow her even before sharing her plans with her still he should mould them according to her  Will you be saying same too if he had some other work too ? The woman logic his priorities cannot be other woman My question to you didn't shekhars and Sanchi knew about Jagaya Ganga?Why he needs to mantain distance for Sanchi's sake particularly now when she has  been trying to show before to him she is ok with him helping Ganga now ? its Sanchi who is not fair with her would be fiancee how come Jagaya is at fault ?

and whats the issue he is not going with ganga , engagement will happen , distance maintaining too from Ganga perhaps next time Sanchi will ask him to leave his hospital work too other doctors can take care of that you go with birthday he should follow her right? otherwise not fair with would be fiancee Her desires should be kept in notice even more than patients 
leavesandwaves thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Jagya is now like HamletπŸ˜†
Missesha thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Sidra, ofcourse Sa is evil and she is only cheating with this date of 16th so that J does not go with G. 

But genuinely assuming if 16th was the only date for engagement & Sa was not a manipulative as she is, but she did not like J-G closeness, then would it be fair for J to postpone his engagement just because another woman is his priority. 
(I have put this assumption because J thinks Sa is genuine & this is the only date where he has to choose between Sa or G)

It's like how we objected when Anandi did not give much importance to Shiv post marriage but ran in to J's matters whenever possible. 

I mentioned in my earlier post that just because Cvs have painted Sa so black, we don't find it wrong for J to give importance to G over Sa.

But we found the same J wrong when he married Gauri over Anandi, just because A was his wife (and not evil)  & Gauri was another woman. So going by the same standards, J is still two-timing two women. He has got engaged to someone he pays no hoots to, and on the other hand he is giving hopes to that other woman, but not even giving her the rights. 

At this stage, J is not fair to Sa, just because he chose her but cannot give priority to her emotions over G's. 

Further to this, you may have your POV and  that's absolutely fine, but in my POV J has not balanced his relations. 

Things will get balanced when J calls off with Sa. At that stage he will not have any obligation to keep Sa happy. Currently he has that obligation

Edited by Missesha - 10 years ago
leavesandwaves thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
It is like having a cake and eating it too.πŸ˜†
ButterflyOnRose thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by: Missesha

Sidra. he has every right to do so, since it is his engagement too. But here the question is not about rights, it is about priorities. 


When he has informed her before i am going with Ganga on 16th how come you can say he is not balancing it ? He told her only for this set everything according to this why she cannot do so ? why he is suppose to set everything according to her why not she ?The issue is she didn't He told her Esha you thiink a person telling his plans already to another person and the other person don't cooperate so fault is of that person who told his plans because he is not giving her priority?

How can only consider G's emotions & feelings as a priority over Sa's. Sa already mentioned to him enough times that she is too excited, she wants to look best etc. but has he ever spared a thought for her emotions? He has spared 50,000 thoughts for G & M's safety? Why no balance?


My question to you on monday's episode he participated in her discussion of shopping for the first time he tried to smile with her He is giving himself in Why? we know he never wanted to marry neither he loves her since he said yes he considers it his responsibilty to make her feel better since he is going to marry her Considering her as his going to be life partner he tried to share things with her otherwise we know he keeps reservations with Ganga too does not share anything with her until she don't pulls it out and he has spared 50000000000000000000000 thoughts for Ganga and Mannu because at the end Sanchi won and his engagement is on 16th while he considers himself  failed to keep his promise with Ganga he is in pain because of that , he has heard her pray  

If going out for G is that important, then has he made sure that Sa is not going to be terribly disturbed since she is his fiance and the relation holds equal or more importance in is his life too. As a fiance / would-be husband, it is his duty towards Sa to look after her and to assure thahow somethings have a priority in his life, without necessarily hurting her. Cvs did not show him doing that. 

My question to you he tried to talk with her she cut the call again he is at fault ?didn't he try to tell her so how can you say he is not making sure she is  not terribly disturbed He said when he decided to tell her  its not fair with her to keep her in dark i hope you have seen the episode 

In fact he gives up on Sa whenever he can, and cannot stand her calls for more than 2 minutes. In that case he should not have immediately agreed to marry her. He should have thought through before agreeing. Now that he has, he is being tossed, which is sad but that's the choice he made.


 he never had dreams she can be so over dominating He tried his best to adjust with her what she is doing from his clothes to his works everything she is trying to dominate Don't do this don't do that don't do that  what you are wearing you cannot wear this that How come he would have thought it before at that time she was pretending to be the most sweetest person on earth she never was like this infront of him  now she is showing her real colors so how can you say he should have thought before My Question would you be able to stand such a person ?His choice where he is allowed to make his choice? If he makes he is trashed doesn't make he is trashed what he should  do ?you tell You are saying he should not have agreed would'n't that be causing pain to his family and so called would be finacee who was telling him she will die without him  if he said yes again he is tossed around . He tried to make everyone happy sacrificing himself tried his best to be with everyone even wore that horrible jacket just to please Sanchi but what he got in return everyone is playing around with him to satisfy themselves Where he was given option to make a choice ? you tell For him there were and are  holes on everyone side  kahan jaye ?




Edited by sidra08 - 10 years ago
ButterflyOnRose thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by: Missesha

Sidra, ofcourse Sa is evil and she is only cheating with this date of 16th so that J does not go with G. 


But genuinely assuming if 16th was the only date for engagement & Sa was not a manipulative as she is, but she did not like J-G closeness, then would it be fair for J to postpone his engagement just because another woman is his priority. 
(I have put this assumption because J thinks Sa is genuine & this is the only date where he has to choose between Sa or G)

It's like how we objected when Anandi did not give much importance to Shiv post marriage but ran in to J's matters whenever possible. 

I mentioned in my earlier post that just because Cvs have painted Sa so black, we don't find it wrong for J to give importance to G over Sa.

But we found the same J wrong when he married Gauri over Anandi, just because A was his wife (and not evil)  & Gauri was another woman. So going by the same standards, J is still two-timing two women. He has got engaged to someone he pays no hoots to, and on the other hand he is giving hopes to that other woman, but not even giving her the rights. 

At this stage, J is not fair to Sa, just because he chose her but cannot give priority to her emotions over G's. 

Further to this, you may have your POV and  that's absolutely fine, but in my POV J has not balanced his relations. 

Things will get balanced when J calls of with Sa. At that stage he will not have any obligation to keep Sa happy. Currently he has that obligation

Esha you keep your views i am not changing i disagree with you completely Not a single word i agree  First if Sa would not be evil then she would have compromised respected him and would have been ok If any good girl would  be at her place she would be ok I place my self i would be ok i am not very good but i am not bad either  because i already know before hand he is helping a woman not that he has other feelings for her if he had he would have never accepted me Sa if had two pieces of sense she would have continued her drama here and gained 1000000 points in front of him and won his heart if she would have postponed the engagement because one thing even she knows Jagaya's heart is a blank page now she despo to write her name on it before Ganga writes That is why she is so desperate but she with her dumbness distanced him from her 

why you feel we are only saying because Sa is evil ? These are just your POV otherwise this is not true we are saying it with logic 

secondly you are saying he is paying no two hoots to Sa great why no two hoots still trying to find answer from you he shared with her everything , he tried to tell her everything , he  changed himself for her killing his likes and dislikes  again he is being blamed he is two timing two women which two women he is two timing what he has done to them  He is not thinking about Ganga his mind is totally occupied with Mannu cause he made a bond with that child when he made up his mind he will never marry He started to see his own dead child in him Where is two timing here He tried his best to be sincere to both  Sorry to say but this two timing is very harsh blame i feel very bad you can  say so  God knows what made you say that 

Going by your views since he has so obligations to Sa obviously she has issues he should not  help any women  so he should not because he  has obligations to her  so forget about Ganga completely otherwise she will terribly disturbed so no help to any woman no matter what for Sa otherwise he is not sincere Two timer of course he is so bad i started to feel Sa now you are not saying but she is a victim now of J's two timing 

and why you are saying things will be balanced if he calls off the engagement how it will be balanced won't it be two timing to Sa Who is he to call of engagement since he has obligations to her he said yes to this proposal completely on his will who is he to call off then he has to make her happy ?

Edited by sidra08 - 10 years ago
Missesha thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Sidra, your last post seems to be attacking me personally rather than my thoughts on the story or characters.

I will keep my thoughts, but I have never asked you to change yours. So why are you telling me what I should do.  

You and I are watching the story with completely different perspectives. And this may be based out of our interpretation of life. Why are you being judgmental about me? 

It's ok if we can't agree with each other, and that's absolutely fine. 

I was only discussing J's rights & duties towards his fiance & his friend and who gets more priority when he has to choose one over the other. And also how he should balance it

I haven't made comments like whether J should help women in need or not . It's absolutely your interpretation of what you think, I think. 

Let's please avoid that. 

Thanks 
Edited by Missesha - 10 years ago
ButterflyOnRose thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Originally posted by: Missesha

Sidra, your last post seems to be attacking me personally rather than my thoughts on the story or characters.


i am sorry but what made you feel that πŸ˜• 

I will keep my thoughts, but I have never asked you to change yours. So why are you telling me what I should do.  

so when i said i am going to change yours ?You said to me this is my POV you keep yours i said you keep yours i am only discussing not changing anyone's views so don't think i am here to change your views Your views i respect but i am not here to change them so be happy to keep them 

You and I are watching the story with completely different perspectives. And this may be based out of our interpretation of life. Why are you being judgmental about me? 

when i am ?just because i am not agreeing with you does not mean i am judgemental just because i am unable to understand your views from which i am only deriving such meaning you are saying he has so  many obligations to Sa and other woman logic then just said going by Sa issues and your views he should not help any woman till he is with Sa  because clearly she has issues with it  

It's ok if we can't agree with each other, and that's absolutely fine. 

of course agree to disagree 

I was only discussing J's rights & duties towards his fiance & his friend and who gets more priority when he has to choose one over the other. And also how he should balance 

so i am explaining to you his POV i found it fine you not  so definitely we will counter 

I haven't made comments like whether J should help women in need or not . It's absolutely your interpretation of what you think, I think. 

i am unable to understand your views from which i am only deriving such meaning you are saying he has so  many obligations to Sa and other woman logic then just said going by Sa issues and your views he should not help any woman till he is with Sa  because clearly she has issues with it  and if you can interpret that we are only saying because Sa is bad where you are not understanding us give us some rights too we can interpret from your points as well when cannot understand You are calling him two timer which is of course very bad work now you will say i never said he is bad then two timers are always bad 

Let's please avoid that. 

if you want to so ok

Thanks 

Thanks a lot but i do say you are mistaking me i didn;t attack you at all i always liked your posts before this time if i am not agreeing  otherwise you can see your posts you will always have me in like button for you this time not then it does not mean i  am attacking you if you felt bad i am sorry 

Edited by sidra08 - 10 years ago
Missesha thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
Sidra, same here. I have been following your posts for a long time and have liked them. And that's why I was slightly hurt when I interpreted your post as attacking me personally.

I am sorry as well. 

I have no issues if we disagree on this issue. That's fine. 

I am sorry for mistaking you. 

Thanks for replying. 






mahi12 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago

@Esha 'If Sanchi would have been a good girl these situations would have never been created in the first place .πŸ˜†A good and sincere  would be fiancee would not have cut the call of her future husband when he was about share his problem with her They would have a proper conversation and derived a conclusion Either Sanchi would have understood or either Jagaya would have concluded something either he does not want to continue with her or either he is being unfair with her anywhere ( which in my view he is not but going by your views  I am saying it )if Jagaya does not know that Sanchi is manipulative he does not even know that she has issues with him helping Ganga  Jagaya knows Sanchi thinks Ganga as a fool but to him she never ever showed she has issues with his helping Ganga in fact she praised him at many places for it in her drama He was sincere to her considering  her as  his future wife thats why he felt the need of sharing  everything with her and considering she will understand  because she has been showing to him she is fine with him helping Ganga  . I believe two timing is an unfair word to be used here  for him He is  not two timing  anyone here its he who is being two timed here by Sanchi and his family that's why these  situations are coming

For Jagaya Ganga is not priority here neither her feelings and emotions His priority his responsibility He said it many times that is the actual thing here  He has made it clear to everyone He wants to complete the responsibility he took and a promise he made to himself and Ganga when Sanchi was no where in his life Jagaya is not a like a normal man here  He is a man carrying a burden on him of his past  where he considers himself a failure to complete in all responsibilities now he does not want to fail  otherwise he thinks he will collapse and this is  what is happening to him He finds himself failure again he failed to fulfill a promise , a responsibility  and this is first responsibility he took ever since he started his new life and Ganga needs help here He knows what his  support means to her  because he has shown this path to her and Ganga 's pray he too heard which is proof enough for him his support here means world to her so how he won't be sad and stress on it too much?

If Jagaya cannot stand Sanchi even two minutes now then again its her fault  if she would not have been like this she would have won his heart by now  First Jagaya is  not equal to an unmarried man He cannot show the excitement of a bachelor He is a man carrying a baggage of two failed relationships  where he emotionally invested himself so obviously her love talks won't excite him  and He was clear to Sanchi and she told  him she understands him very well what she is getting into She said to him if you remember I will wait when you will come out of your past  be able to lead a new life I will wait for you to realize your feelings for me but is she keeping her  those words ?No but  Still the guy is trying hard to give himself into her demands to please her and he tries to be happy with her   but she is crossing the line  Shiv knew what he is getting into  marrying a divorcee  a woman who has emotionally invested a lot in her  first relationship she fell in love worshipped her husband like god failed in first marriage  therefore he gave her needed time and space Sanchi on contrary knows Jagaya has two time got married  In both relationships he has emotionally invested and is carrying wounds in him but how she is handling him by dominating him She tries to dominate for him everything Till how long he can show her patience The Sanchi till the time when he accepted the proposal was never like this See her in  both places and compare her Her drama was completely different at that time  now she is showing her real colors and after engagement she will show even more If she would have been like Shiv here Then these situations would not  have come ever so before counting as Jagya's fault he is not completing the obligations to his would be  fiancee notice it's the would be  fiancee who is failing big time  in her obligations that's why this is coming up and this will take bitter shape when in future she will even ask Jagya to leave his hospital work for her , his family priorities for her as well

If we held Anandi mistaking she runs for Jagaya for everything then it was because Jagaya has his family to take care of him she does not need to interfere When his own father was fine let my son come back when he feels he is ready to be here with us then Anandi need not  to throw tears and make Shiv search for Jagaya and drag him back Here Ganga has no one She is a woman with a child going with an uneducated man to a strange new place which  she has never  seen in her dreams she is like a new born baby here who is unfamiliar with the new life she has stepped into  she needs help so how come both situations are comparable ?Jagaya cannot prepone the trip we have seen he is busy with hospital Can he risk the lives of his patients? Lal is shown to be busy with epidemic cases I don't think he has returned yet and to top it all his own family has backed off from the responsibility they took of Ganga now his mother is telling him she is a curse for  them  before she never shared anything with him so how he can give Ganga;s responsibility to anyone else tomorrow that person can say same too He better thought of doing it on his own

I don't think Jagaya has any fault here At Fault are others from Sanchi to Singhs who are failing big time in handling anything Sanchi is cheating him after saying to him she is fine with him helping Ganga , after saying to him she will give him time and space she is backing off from her words , Singhs consider him for nothing if they had issues with Ganga they should have discussed with  him instead of doing everything behind his back and cheating him they are fine , when Sanchi's proposal arrived understanding their son's emotional state they should have asked Shekhars we need time to think over it  even they were not  convinced with it  only Sumitra was but they pounced on him They could tell Shekhars the truth and also tell them Jagaya has returned from hospital after having a severe injury on head we don't want to put him under pressure for something like this we need some time They could talk with him in proper way have a conversation with him listen to him convey their feelings to him instead of emotional blackmail but they didn't

 

Jagaya has redeemed but don't forget his emotional state He is  person who carries many fears in him He has been trashed years , even disowned by his family for his mistakes , causing them pain he has  realized his mistakes but also a part of him has died too  a desire to live for himself  He has less confidence in him regarding his own self He does not take stand for himself revolting against his family he does not want to cause any pain to them in anyway he is too scared for getting into  relationships considering he is not the right life partner Confidence need to be build back in him  by his family who when brought him back home saying to him our son came back to us but what they are doing ? They are killing his confidence more Never for once they helped in anything They are shunning whatever he does or says one after the other and forcing him to follow them  killing him more The guy is dying several internal deaths His confidence is dying and Singhs will one day see him a living dead   if they didn't stop their acts and understood him Who ever  wants to be his life partner  she should accept him as what he is , what he is doing , instead of forcing him , molding him and this what Sanchi is doing Fault is complete hers if she would be sensible  today this all would never been happening  She proposed him he didn't so she should be cooperating to him  

 

This is my POV you may differ 


sorry for long post πŸ˜†

Edited by mahi12 - 10 years ago