It's soo cute!
I don't know why people said that you don't write well and that you should leave IF because that's not true at all! You have great ideas and maybe you need some polish but it's not that bad! I have seen worse from people who get showers of likes and comments. With time and practice, I'm sure that you will improve until it's perfect. Keep it up dear! Don't lose heart. I would recommend you to read a lot of novels during your freetime [not just FFs on the internet because some people have really bad style]. But you already have a nice style, read a lot and keep writing and you'll seen how that helpd you! 😉
Love,
Shikha
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