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purvi is so selfish DT note pg 10 (Page 9)

machar13 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:05pm | IP Logged
Ugh. Purvi is selfish, purvis real face...yaar i know we all will never agree, but come on! Everyday there is at least 2-3 threads of complaining abt purvi selfishness, mahantas, etc. I really am failing to understand why ppl think that purvi is always wrong ? There was a nice post abt the ugliness of society particularly toward women. Purvi made mistakes but so did all other characters...ovi, onir, Arjun...we say the same arguments on each of these threads...y do u all hate her so much over others ? Ovi, for instance is beyond being a spoiled brat...reformed now though...onir did switch babies...Arjun just did whatever purvi asked. All dumb characters but y single out purvi ???????

Punni got away scot free and she was the catalyst to ovi starting the deal marriage, right? But ovi emotionally blackmailed purvi first, then purvi emotionally blackmailed Arjun...honestly how is this all purvis fault ? 

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muse10 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:11pm | IP Logged
@Soniyaa

First, I made it very clear from the outset that it is all about perspectives.

From the point of view of Onir's well wisher, it would be confusing surely because she/he would expect Purvi to consider if there could be a reason behind this whole thing happening. If a person has been so good all along, wouldn't you want to think - wait a minute, this does not go with what my experience has been so far. And yes, Purvi showed affection for Onir, but betrayal in a marriage is about romantic love, not about any other kind. I would expect a thoughtful person to think - Oh, so he was married! But he still remained away from his wife all this time to help me! I will get out but I wish him well. I will be grateful.

As for reference to another man's child, I have never made any remarks about character in this regard and nor do I consider that a moral deviation. The reason I made a reference to it is because that child should remind her what he had done for her and her child. 

With that said, I will rest my case. I just said in another post that I am partially on both sides and I will not repeat it.


Edited by muse10 - 14 August 2013 at 2:14pm

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soniiyaa

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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:23pm | IP Logged
@muse10 it is about perspective but I def disagree with your statement that betrayal is only in romantic love. In that case there was no betrayal in Arovis case either as Arjun never loved ovi. What would be call that then? I believe it's still betrayal regardless of what type of love it is, whether its in a friendship or in another relationship among family members like between a mother and son. Trust broken = betrayal in my opinion.

As for purvi taking time to find out abt onir. You're right . That would be sensible thing to do but not in EK shows. But during the shady days, purvi even spoke to onir a few times asking for the truth about what's goin on. He never have that to her until Archu revealed it at party. Maybe she just gave up?

The child is a symbol of onirs good deeds of accepting and taking responsibility but then again I don't believe purvi is indebted to onir for this. She didn't ask for favors. He willingly wanted to.

Again, my point is not that onirs good should be forgotten but that based upon how much purvi knows abt it and what she's done before abt asking him, she has every right to be angry and feel betrayed.

As for the friends of onir. How much do they really know? Shalini was saying he lost his license bc of the organ trafficking ... I wonder if she knows it was rly bc of the baby swapping? How much does she know I wonder...

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muse10 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:45pm | IP Logged
Hi Soniyaa 

see below


Edited by muse10 - 14 August 2013 at 2:50pm
muse10 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:48pm | IP Logged

Quotes

I def disagree with your statement that betrayal is only in romantic love.

As for purvi taking time to find out abt onir. You're right . That would be sensible thing to do but not in EK shows. 

The child is a symbol of onirs good deeds of accepting and taking responsibility but then again I don't believe purvi is indebted to onir for this. She didn't ask for favors. He willingly wanted to. 

Again, my point is not that onirs good should be forgotten but that based upon how much purvi knows abt it and what she's done before abt asking him, she has every right to be angry and feel betrayed.

As for the friends of onir. How much do they really know? Shalini was saying he lost his license bc of the organ trafficking ... I wonder if she knows it was rly bc of the baby swapping? How much does she know I wonder...[
/QUOTE]



Hi Soniyaa:

(I am posting this again since earlier it came out wierd)

 Thanks for your response. You are right that quotes make it long. But I am only keeping parts that I am responding to.

 I did not say betrayal is only in romantic love as a blanket statement. I said, in marriage, betrayal is about romantic love. There are of course all sorts of betrayals in all types of relationships. But when it in marriage, it is about romantic love.

 Ha ha! True about EK shows (even though this is the first I have watched)! I still think that Purvi could have inquired more even on hearing the truth! She is the thoughtful one in all other instances.

 We all know that Onir accepted to help Purvi and she did not ask for help. But just because someone is nice enough to offer help even without asking, that does not mean that the person receiving the help is entitled to be dismissive about any need to feel grateful. In fact, if someone is so gracious as to offer help without being asked (giving dignity to the person whom he/she is offering help), then a thoughtful recipient of help would even be more grateful. Feeling grateful is not about having burden, it is about appreciating someone's goodwill and responding to it.

 Finally, I was using Shalini only as an example. I am not saying this Shalini's perspective. I am saying it is of someone who has known Onir very well for years.

 

Any way, nice debating with you since you respond with reason. 

 



Edited by muse10 - 14 August 2013 at 2:49pm

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machar13soniiyaa

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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 2:58pm | IP Logged
Hey muse10, with the shalini part I meant to start a new discussion as to how much has onir told her? How much does she know in general. In yesterday's episode, she said he lost his license bc of the organs issues but if we recall onir lost it bc of baby swap. When shalini said it, onir did not correct her so I was just wondering how Much does she know and what has he told her?

I agreed and have said that onirs good deeds must be appericiate but from your posts i w gotten this feeling that bc of those good deeds purvi doesn't have rigt to be angry or feel betrayed. I feel she does. She's unaware of his real intentions and if I were her I would be upset. It would be selfish of purvi to mistreat him after knowing the real reasons as to why he's doing this charade but not right now when she doesn't know.

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muse10 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 3:52pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by soniiyaa

Hey muse10, with the shalini part I meant to start a new discussion as to how much has onir told her? How much does she know in general. In yesterday's episode, she said he lost his license bc of the organs issues but if we recall onir lost it bc of baby swap. When shalini said it, onir did not correct her so I was just wondering how Much does she know and what has he told her?

I agreed and have said that onirs good deeds must be appericiate but from your posts i w gotten this feeling that bc of those good deeds purvi doesn't have rigt to be angry or feel betrayed. I feel she does. She's unaware of his real intentions and if I were her I would be upset. It would be selfish of purvi to mistreat him after knowing the real reasons as to why he's doing this charade but not right now when she doesn't know.

Hi Soniyaa:

Thanks.

No, I do not mean that Purvi does not have a right to get angry. In all marriages there are quarrels and misunderstandings. But in a marriage like Purvi and Onir's, which was based on a deep understanding (at least that is the impression that was created in the beginning), one expects thoughtful reaction and not jumping to conclusions. That is all. 

Their marriage had a great potential to end as a beautiful relationship. The way Purvi was shown to react without further thought was incongruous with all that went before and that is my gripe against the turn.
I am therefore hoping that the rest of the track will bring dignity and good will for all.

Any way, I am going to be on vacation for the next two weeks. So, if I don't respond to your response to this post, please don't think I am ignoring - I just won't have access to computer regularly.
machar13 Senior Member
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Posted: 14 August 2013 at 4:15pm | IP Logged
@ muse10: I appreciate your presenting this perspective. You are 1000% correct that onir and purvi could have had a beautiful relationship in the end. And purvi seemed to have difficulty in believing onir was previously married or that he was bad. She did stand by him...but maybe not enuf? i think onir had done a good job in fooling everyone, right? onir knows that purvi could only love Arjun and he learned the same abt Arjun..but she would not leave onir out of duty to his good deeds toward her...but onir realized despite his feelings, purvi was not his to have. So onirs intention was for her to believe that he was bad. We cannot fault purvi for falling for that play, right ? She will find out and she will feel horrible but onir himself feels this is right. He loves purvi but does want her but yet knows he can't. He is a truely a selfless person in his profession and person too.Tongue

Maybe he will end up with ovi ??????? I wished for that before...someone who ovi can love selflessly (she loved Arjun selfishly)... Just sayin'Wink


Edited by machar13 - 14 August 2013 at 4:18pm

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