Joined: 13 February 2011
Joined: 06 September 2012
"Anjie, I need help" Nidhi whimpered picking up her phone
"Ab kya hua ?"
"What should I talk ….?"
"What should I talk to him Anjie…..with Ashuthosh" Nidhi blabbered
"What do you mean by what to talk ..." Anjie grumbled
"Anjie please help …you know how awful I am in all this."Nidhi whimpered
Huffing out her irritation, anjie replied briskly "ok ...Here you go; just to talk to him …you know general stuff, try getting to know each other ….."
"Ask him about his hobbies, what he expects; what are his plans …try to understand him? What kind of person he is "
"How can I judge anyone in just one meet?"
"That is million dollar question which I don't have an answer …but that is the way it work in arrange marriages, you need to trust your instincts …"
"My Instincts! I can't do that …"
"But there is no other way out baby ….." Anjie mumbled, when Nidhi did not reply Anjie asked "what is bothering you?"
" be honest " Anjie persisted
"huh …I think everything "she went still "I thought when time comes I will be ready, you know …. But it's difficult, I can't do this "
"It's not difficult and you can do this …it's just you need to trust yourself" Anjie mumbled "and everyone will not be like ...you know amar …once it happened does not mean that it will happen again …."Anjie murmured
Tears brimmed in her eyes as unsaid emotions clogged inside her heart "I am scared Anjie ….very scared to trust once again" she mumbled briefly
"I know Nidhi ….I know "that's all she heard before disconnecting the call.
"Long back , I abandoned the notion of falling in love just like I abandoned my old self ….I am someone else now , some stranger caught in my own flesh and bones …I don't know her dreams nor her wishes . I don't know what she is or what she wants out of life. …sometime she is cold and frigid, devoid of emotions and empty of dreams …..She is like soft tissued mollusk caught inside sun hardened shell…..she is like a moth fighting a way out of her darkness towards her light. …but most of the time I feel she is just plain scared"
With a sigh CV closed the white parchment paper and looked at his daughter … she looked like a mystery which he cannot resolve, someone he does not know. These papers, little pieces of her burned out thoughts carried him into her world …He know it is wrong to pry on someone else private thoughts. Even though someone is no one but his own daughter …he never entertained the idea of interfering in her life but he made clear of her limitation which she should not cross…he had always been open to her more like friend less than a father and she was much aware of it and knew not to hide anything from her father ….she was open and transparent with her thoughts…
But CV remembered everything changed when she turned 21; her vacant and red rimmed eyes told him more about her …he recognized a kind of morbidity behind her bubbly self , she looked cold and distant sometime….she behaved as if her thoughts belong only to her and her inner world became very private to her ….it is long after he caught hold of these small paper which gave insight of what is going on in her head …he realized there is different world inside her …different from what she is from outside, where his little girl is burning , freezing and fighting with the demons he is not aware of ….
"Nidhi …yahan aana beta?" CV called out for her.
"Baba ….aapka breakfast ready hai, ladoon kya?" Nidhi entered holding cup of hot coffee
" Abi nahi …thodi der baad ..your dadi bua called" telling this he beckoned an empty space next to him and signaled Nidhi to join in
When she settled down comfortably, he spoke ", they are in rishi kesh …bohot maze kar rhe hai sab" he smiled
" you dint told her that …you know about Ashuthosh"
Cv shook his head " I remember my promise"
of empty seconds
"so are you meeting him today?" Cv asked casually
She nodded her head "you can tell me if you don't like him ...if you are not happy with this proposal you know that right?"
She nodded her head.
"When I married your mother …even though it was love marriage, even though I knew her inside out …you know we had our set of apprehension, fears about our future" CV stopped looking into her eyes
"And it is most natural thing to feel this fear, when the person you are going to spend rest of your life is complete stranger …." He smiled
He looked down to find her dwelling on each and every word he is telling "I know what is going on in your head …I can see that, but don't forget that even for him you are complete stranger and just like you, he is also going through same phase …"
"But…how to ... how to recognize what kind of person he is?" she mumbled slowly
"What are your fears?" he asked
" I don't know him ..How can I trust him?" she replied in whimpering tone
"There are so many things which answer your question …like from how he talk and how he treat you …from how well he deal with outside world and how much he respect an individual…."
When she did not respond he continued "There are many things that we can't understand nidhi...for example the past. The bad things that happened... and we become afraid. Of what might happen in the future. It's okay to be afraid. But we have to keep hoping and believing... to keep hoping and trying our best to be good and do well. Even when we're afraid" he tried to shoo away her unsaid fear with his words.
" So what is your tip for today's meet ?" Nidhi asked him smilingly
"Ohh its simple ….be honest, be what you are and rest everything will fall into places hmm" CV patted her head affectionately
After changing into dozen clothes, Nidhi finally settled into bottle green kurtha and snow white leggings and matching earring to go with her dress …she spent few minute to decide whether to leave her hair open but then finally …she pulled it into loose pony and went outside wearing her flat heeled sandals which anjie bought from Delhi.
Getting down from car…for a brief moment her mind kept on wondering about this perfect stranger Dr Ashuthosh, she wondered how does he look, how tall he must be? Whether he likes music...What kind of interest he has apart from medicine...Will he be sensitive or cold and frigid just as he sounded...will he be good and kind or rude and arrogant? ..Will he be too talkative or just plain reserved …all these thoughts unnerved her and pulled her every side ….
Her cell phone buzzed and caller ID showed that it is anjie "Nidhi ….you left already?"
Slowly walking toward barista, Nidhi mumbled "yes ...I reached …now going inside to meet him"
She felt the cold breeze sweeping through her, mixing her inside with new found excitement and fear…opening the door wide open ,she stepped inside "acha call me once you done there ok …" She heard Anjie words like echo passing through her stressed out nerves .She looked around searching for a glimpse of him , trying to recognize the unfamiliar face in middle of strangers ….just then her eyes caught hold of pair of smiling eyes which are deep and gravely just like his voice ….his smile spreaded over his handsome face showing the delicate veins around his neck and small dimple on his left cheek. His thick dark hair neatly combed but with few fringes still falling on his beautiful eyes ….
He walked towards her extending his hand …with his eyes still fixed on her, his each step echoing through her inside. And her heart is thudding below her breast bone with intensity which terrified her. Taking his strong and firm hand, she stared at him with her mouth wide open and eyes wide in awe and admiration….
" Hi ..Umm…Nidhi Verma" He was first to break the stunned silence
" Hi …. " she mumbled dully as deep blush crawled on her cheeks
"Are you fine? …hmm, you look bit shaken, I dint knew that ….my looks are so bad" he grinned
"Crap, from when my expressions became so transparent, gets a hold Ms Verma" Her face flushed
"No …I am fine "she mumbled as he pulled a chair for her "thank you "she whispered.
She breathed and her senses quickly registered his delicious smell of some expensive after shave and body wash. "What the hell I am doing" she grumbled when she realized he is looking at her with a cute smile.
Plucking her shaken self, she took couple of breaths to balance her toppled inside,
She did not expected this ….not some Greek god waiting for her with a smile which can kill her so smoothly "hell no! "She thought
Rubbing his hand, he coughed to get her distracted self ….he looked more at ease with his body and surrounding "Confident" she made a mental note, he looked charming with his dazzling smile but as she stared down at her own self …. Next to him she looked plain dull and boring and full of complexes
"Did you said anything …sorry I could not here?" he asked
"No, nothing like that …I was just …"
Sensing her discomfort, ashu changed the topic "what do you want to have, coffee, iced tea…I think, and here it is self service …."
" umm..I need Strawberry soda" she blurted out
"You need ….? "He asked giving lopsided smile
" I mean ..I prefer "
"Ok, I will go get it ...Anything else you need …you look pale" he asked narrowing his eyes
"No nothing …I am fine "she replied curtly
"Fine then ..." he walked away to get their order
Taking lungful of air, she tried to maintain equilibrium "seriously ...is he really 33" she frowned just then her cell phone buzzed showing a message from Anjie …
"I hope, you bathed and brushed??…
No visible hair on nose, upper lip and chin??
No dirty chipped nails??ROFLMAO Enjoy "
"Jeez …." She looked up with horrified expression to find him staring at her in concern ….
"You freeze when you are nervous?" he asked standing close to her
" No I don't …huh…it's just I am bit Sociophobic !! , I take time to get comfortable" she mumbled "Sociophobic! Is there word like that?" she wondered rolling her eyes.
"Do I make you nervous?" he asked looking into her eyes "why can't he look somewhere else" she flushed when she caught hold of his intense gaze….
"No I am not nervous …" she blabbered
"You are trembling ….." he replied "Shit, can this get any worse than this!!"
" I am cold , its breezy outside ….." she stuttered
Before he could tell something, she muttered" I am fine, more than fine...it is just my friend…uhmm just …just forget about it"
"I can see you are very restless ….or is it the way you are" he grinned "Oh he is pulling my leg' I hope so"
When she did not reply he continued "no need to so feel so unease, be comfortable …." He smiled warmly.
" I hope , I am not making you feel awkward …" she asked uneasily
"No way, I am enjoying your discomfort" he grinned "jeez, what a sadist!" she grumbled to herself
"Baba told me, you shifted to India recently …All settled down?" After some time she asked trying to establish a conversation
"Yes ….kind of, started attending surgeries from yesterday ….." he smiled
"If I am not wrong, you are pursuing MBA …hows it coming along? "
" oh , it is fine …..I took HR, bit easy area comparative to finance …" she replied "by the way ...heard that you received some recognition award for your work!!...congrats!" she grinned
Cocking his head one side, he gave his dazzling smile, he looked pleased "Thank you, it was for my thesis on Nazi genocide and involvement of physician during 2nd world war"
"So what you concluded in the end?" she asked
"In what sense?" he gave her puzzled look
"What you concluded about Hitler's actions during 2nd world war …."
"That was not my approach …"
"Then what was your approach? He killed 11 million people just for the reason that they are not pure Aryans, how crazy does it sound huh! Out of all his concentration camps, In Auschwitz alone 6 million people died …."
"When it comes to war, sacrifices are meant to happen Ms Verma ... " Ashu replied
"Are you defending him?"
"No I am not …but I think, you are being judgmental here "he replied "and beside its 6 million not, 11 …." he added
"Huh, are you kidding me!! 6 or 11, still both are in million and Calling me judgmental over Hitler" She glared
"If you think I am judgmental, then I think you are autocrat just like your Hitler …" she snapped
He looked taken aback and his eyes blazed "Shit, he is angry! Let him be who the hell he thinks to call me judgmental". not taking her eyes away from his blazing stare she muttered "Beside, your Hitler ….he was really mad, scientifically it was proved …that guy suffered from syphilis ...it's an STD …and it affected his nervous system by the time he got power in his hand …so moral of the story he was just PLAIN MAD" she fumed…..
"Do you know Hitler was nominated for world peace award?" Ashu gave amused look staring at her fuming self
"He must be some crack head to nominate him for such role" she grumbled
"Crack head!! That's a rude word to say Ms Verma …" Ashu gave an unpleasant look. "To clear your doubts, I am against Hitler's way as much as you are …but not his intentions! His intention were good, he thought good thing for his nation …it is just that he was human and committed his share of mistakes to succeed in that"
"Mistakes! ….He committed crime!" she groused.
"Will you please stop talking to yourself and start with me …" he grumbled "ouch, that was sudden …and it was rude and he is annoyed, God! He is so controlling" she looked at him nervously.
"I think, its better if we leave Hitler ...Let him rest in peace" she grumbled desperate to lighten up the atmosphere,.
The way she sat pouting with her annoyed expression, in turn made him go into hiccupping laugh
"Are you always like this or it is just today?" he asked controlling his chuckle
"Like a jungli billi, ready to pounce on whoever sits next to you"
"That's rude …and I am offended! "She pouted.
" I never met someone like you ….seriously !" he chuckled even more
"Even I never met anyone like you …..Such a Hitler lover!" She replied rolling her eyes
"Hitler lover?!!...That is the most extraordinary compliment I ever got so far …." He grinned which made her throw her head back and join in his laughter ….
When she stopped and looked at him, he looked flushed and shaken just like her older self….it was abrupt and impossible to avoid the new glint in his eyes, their eyes instantly met and the cheek so of each were overspread with deepest blush. He looked absolutely startled and for a moment immoveable by surprise ….but shortly recovering himself, he mumbled in his frigid trembling voice "I think, we should go now ….."
It was abrupt and she was taken aback with this sudden change in him and this sudden coldness reminded of someone she knew!
She was not pleased and she did not try to hide her annoyance...And with one swift motion, she got up and made a move out of barista….
"Ok, what next? Final good bye from MR. Hitler lover huh" She frowned; A small sweeping disappointment lingered in her head even before she could register it …
Starting up her car, she waited for him to say something but he just stood still as if he is freezed under light blue sky …
Turning around, she took one last look at his face, his tall frame, his masculine arms hugging around his chest ….he looked pale, shaken and like someone whose inside is flared up and full of chaos "Good bye ..." she mumbled
"What did you said?" he looked startled, his eyes blazing with anger and displeasure.
It is as if, his inside keep changing ….one time he is warm and fun to be with and next, he is all cold and frigid...and really Mad.
"Confused and ….huh complicated!" she made a mental note
Even before she could stop, she heard her voice "goodbye for now …" she repeated again
His frown disappeared and his contracted chest heaved in relief" Sure, goodbye until we meet again ..." he smiled back like he could not help it, like all teeth and sparkling eyes.
"My goodness! Is it a yes then?" she stared at him, startled, pleased and what not with a joy which she never felt from a quite a long time …..
I do hope you people like this Chapter ...Do let me know
Next chapter monday ... Thank you
Joined: 06 September 2012
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