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The world has always seen people falling in love. Love brings happiness in abundance, and it is said that true love surpasses, all worldly constraints-Society, Class and Religion. But when Love itself is a toy in the hands of fate, then very few manage to survive its harsh consequences, and the ones who survive are the real Martyrs in the battle of love.
18th century India
Industrial revolution in England had hit the country in full swing and with it saw the impact on other countries on which England had its rule, especially in India. In all the major cities of India, the poor was exploited for the profit of the rich, small villages of Mussoorie were having a hard time too to cope up to the changes of industrialization. Most of the lands of the farmers were taken away by the zamindaars who had eventually handed it over to the British officers handling the state, and the poor farmers and their family were starving and some had their children indulged in child labour in hope of receiving a meal in a day.
In one of those villages of Mussoorie, there lived a farmer's family, who lived a simple, yet happy life as it felt complete and contended with whatever God gave them. Yet a mother's worries are always specific about her daughter, and Kaushalya was worried about her beautiful and fragile daughter Manyata, whose childhood love Udayveer came from a wealthy family. After Manyata's family lost their land, her father in that sorrow began to drink heavily, and the only way to support the family was mother and daughter going out to work in the Havelli. Udayveer and Manyata liked each other from childhood and there love was growing with each day.
Uday would wait for her everyday and on rainy days, he used to take Manyata quietly to the distant fields and they would enjoy dancing and playing in the rain, eating fruits together in the shed and being lost in each other. The rain water falling on her beautiful body, her luscious lips, her bosom, her half-covered waist by her dupatta made Uday's desires grow wilder with each passing day. His love bites on her rain-soaked body, her neck, cleavage and navel made Manyata dance in an unknown pleasure. Pleasure of the innocence of first love! Uday wished to be the droplets of rain that could pass anywhere through her body. He felt lost in her beautiful smile, her big eyes and those great locks of hair that were so beautifully done in plaits. Both used to find happiness in each other arms, and Uday felt his childhood returning in her presence. Time passed and they became too close, their body wanting only more of each other, with each passing day and the wet fields of the village witnessed the love making of the young couple in the heavy rainfall when all the farmers and flocks stayed at home.
They decided to elope together and get married as society would never consider them together, and they did not care about anyone else, but only if they knew fate had something else in store for them. Udayveer parents came to know about this secret affair as the couple was caught red handed romancing in the fields, and fired Manyata's mother and herself from work. Uday rebelled but his father was adamant in sending him to the city to help his brothers in their business and Kaushalya after begging for work everywhere, managed to get work but only for her daughter, who was supposed to work in a landlord's place in the town.
"They are very rich people Manyata, but still they agreed as they are your father's distant relative.Who will give us work here, when you have brought shame to the family by having an affair with Thakur sahab's son?" Kaushalya yelled at Manyata as she didn't want to go to town.
"But Ma, Uday loves me and he said he will talk to his family, and can't my other sisters also work? Why do i have to toil always?" Manyata tried to convince as she didn't want to be separate from him
But after she came to know that Uday had left for the city she too left for the town with a heavy heart. Aryan Rai Choudhury the gold merchant's son lusted Manyata from the day she came to work. She was told to stay in their servant's quarter and Aryan tried ways to force himself on her, but Manyata being loyal to Udayveer, could not allow anyone else to claim her body and soul. She used to cry secretly as she was scared of working there anymore. Most of the time the merchant used to be away from home on business, and Aryan's mother was bedridden and blind, which meant she was not of any help to Manyata's safety. When Manyata tried to run one day from the place, Aryan caught hold of her. He was quite drunk and it was late midnight, which was a right opportunity for him to rape this poor helpless girl. She tried to scream and beg him to stop but all her cries of pleas went in vain. He got his pleasures and threw her out of the room after that. Manyata was in a great trauma and she headed home, deciding never to return. She was in pain and her tears fell endlessly; the only console that time she could get was her sweet home and her mother's warmth, but she was more hopeless when she received rejection from her family and her mother, for being IMPURE NOW. Life seemed to suddenly lose all the fragrance and essence and she sat on the highway looking vaguely on the trucks and cars passing by. It was raining heavily, making Manyata all soaked but, her life didn't matter anymore to her. The rain drops only helped in hiding her tears full of grief. Just then someone bent down and took her name
"Manyata, my love...where have you been?..what are you doing here?.." Uday felt relieved seeing his love after a long time, but then he was so lost in her that her torn choli and ghagra did not catch his attention and he hugged her with all his might and kissed her forehead.
"It is the best rainy season of my life, remember how we used to spend time with each other on those fields dancing and making love in the rain?..i thought i will never be able to see you again, and see today i again found you in a rainy day.." Uday said happily while Manyata stayed in Uday's embrace speechless, without any expression in her face. She tried to heal her pain by hugging him tight. He kissed every possible part of her face which was completely wet due to the overflowing rain, and he promised to marry her no matter who and what comes on their way, which gave a new hope to Manyata to make a fresh start. She did not let him know anything about Aryan, as she feared to tell him about her horrible past. They left the village and settled in the town as no one was ready to accept their relation and those few days must have been the best day of Uday and Manyata's life. Manyata had finally shed her tears and again started living her life to the fullest!..A happy married life with Udayveer, and being the wife of your beloved is something, not everyone is lucky enough to become. There 6months of togetherness was like paradise for both of them and little did they knew, that beyond it lay solely darkness.
Aryan Rai Choudhury suddenly happened to visit the town where Manveer stayed, for some work and he noticed a girl like Manyata. He got curious about it, and ordered his men to trace her, which resulted in him showing up in their house after a couple of days. It was almost 9PM when the couple were about to go to sleep, when their fate knocked on the door and Aryan showed up. Manyata was horror stricken seeing her past in front of her, as talking about Aryan was the last thing Manyata wanted in her happy life. She didn't want to disclose anything to Uday as she feared to lose him, but as destiny had other plans, the secret came out in a very bad way.
"So you didn't tell your husband about our pleasurable nights Manyata?..You didn't tell him that you suddenly ran away one fine day from my house, as you got tired of me?..." Aryan tried to show a fake anger in his voice.
Uday only looked at Manyata demanding an answer, but Manyata had lost her patience; she screamed at Aryan
"Shut up you bus***d..you always lusted me and when you got the chance, you forced yourself on me. It was a rape and not any pleasure..Believe me Uday, this man is a beast" and she cried out and fell on the floor. Aryan's work was done, as he knew he had broken the trust between the couple.
The words" FORCED YOURSELF ON ME" was ringing in Uday's ears and he announced that he could not stay with a woman, who had a physical relation with another man before marriage, which was hidden from him. He loved her a lot but being a human, it was difficult for him to accept the bitter truth. Manyata although shocked accepted his decision and went out of his life. Aryan made every possible way to bound her to move back with him, specially promising a good life for her family, which he indeed gave them to prove to Manyata. The poor girl having no options left returned to his house, but she had promised herself, not to let any men use her for some bodily pleasures. Eventually, Aryan's frequent attacks on her and she trying to save herself made her do the most gravest thing she ever expected''MURDER'. She didn't hesitate to stab him repeatedly, until he died. Never in her life did she feel that an innocent and fragile girl like her would become a murderer one day, but THIS MAN had ruined her life not once but twice and had used her family's dreams like some toy. She felt at peace for committing the horrible sin on earth.
Manyata was immediately arrested and this news melted Uday's heart, and only then did he feel how much his wife had bore because of Aryan Choudhury. He was ashamed of himself for not supporting his wife, but he fought for her till her case was decided. She was sentenced to death after a year as she was carrying Udayveer's child. Uday was in pain, but he did not show his tears and promised Manyata to look after their child and to give him all the love and care of a mother and father, since that was the only way he could show his love to Manyata. Manyata forgave him for his behaviour as she loved him a lot and requested him to get married to her sister as she didn't want him to be alone. She knew that at last her battle against the injustice was over, with her child getting the perfect love which she always had a thirst for, but Uday disagreed to her wish and replied her with firmness
"When you don't agree to stay with me forever, how can i promise you to get married to someone else. This is my punishment for not being by your side. I will always be alone now, will die alone"
Manyata could not help but weep bitterly at this statement of his, but she tried hard to convinced him to marry, but at last gave up as it was his last request too. Manyata's purity had always been questioned, by Uday's parents when they first came to know about their son's affair with a poor girl, then by her parents, for being raped, and then by her husband, whom she loved a lot. Only Death could bring peace to her soul although her heart pained thinking how Uday would bear the years of permanent exile after she is gone. Manyata died but her memories always remained young with Uday, who never forgot her and he gave all he could to his son, to keep the one promise that he had made to his beloved, i.e to take care of their child in every thick and thin.
30 years later
People found a middle-aged man's body wet and lying in the sand outside his house. It was identified to be Udayveer who was very sick for many days and yet he lay in the heavy rainfall throughout the night, embracing a photo of his dear wife Manyata. He died due to the extreme cold and harsh winds, but everyone remarked that he must have died a peaceful death, as his face had a composure which many few could have in their last breathe.
When the first rain drops of the year fall on you
Think that i have kissed you my love
When you smile and dance in the rain
Feel that i have embraced you my soul (my lines)
Uday remembered these last lines of Manyata before she was hanged, and on every rainfall he would dance happily, feeling the presence of his love around him. The day he died, he had fulfilled all his duties, of giving his son a perfect education, and marrying him with the best life-partner. His duties were over and his sickness told him, it was time for him, to meet his wife abode. The next morning of his death there was a beautiful rainbow in the sky, and a child asked her mother as in what it meant. She was given the perfect answer
"A rainbow is the door to heaven, when people die, they go to heaven through that door"
Indeed Udayveer died a peaceful death as he knew he would unite with Manyata in heaven.
There was a time i used to love rainy days until now. The water droplets falling on the ground and the smell of raw mud giving a cool refreshing feeling, the drops falling on every possible place, on the roof tops, on the flower petals, making everyone realise the coming of Monsoon.
But all i remember is the pain and tears that it has given me.
We both used to love rainy days, Udayveer playing with his friends in the basketball court, where playing in the rain was lot more thrilling for him and watching him play from a distance was an excitement for me.
I remember a famous gazal of Jagjit Singh, which goes perfectly with my case
Aaina dekh ke bole yeh sanwarne wale
Ab to be-maut marenge mere marne wale
Dekhke tumko hosh mein aana bhool gaye
Yaad rahe tum aur zamaana bhool gaye
I am Manyata, the girl who has always liked him, loved him and will always be there for him. But maybe he will never know, as i can't tell him. He is Udayveer Singh. The hot, happening, hunk who is not just famous for good looks but also for his good scores in report cards, whereas i am a simple ordinary looking girl, who is miserable in her studies. Ohh Lord, why didn't you give at least something in me? If not looks then some talent, talent in studies or may be talent to attract guys, Girls who looks simpler to me , have a cool boyfriend, whereas i still seem to be single, even in my 10th standard. Uday was probably aware of my interest for him, as i used to secretly look at him from a distance, and he sometimes waved his hand or smiled in return, which made me jump in joy like a child after coming home. My friends teased me with his name, and often told me to go and confess him my feelings, but they didn't know that it was like hoping for the raindrops in a rough desert. Why would such a famous and hot guy want a GF like me?
"Look we have the Uday pankha here..did he talk to you yesterday?..what did he say?.", my friend Manisha teased
That was enough to make me go red like a tomato. Uday told me "HI" the other day and asked which class i was.
I sometimes used to peep into his classroom, to get a glimpse of him and the other day i did the same. How much i wished to become a senior with some magic wand and sit with him in his classroom. Uday was in his 12th standard Science stream, but he was a real artist. How easily he used to escape after playing tricks on his teachers and friends in the classroom without getting caught! I used to enjoy his little tricks of sticking his friends to the wall and the teachers to the chairs!
But that day he was not in the room and while i was looking for him inside the classroom, someone patted on my back and as i turned, i felt my heart jumping out of my chest. Its was Uday, he was looking at me, with lots of doubts.
"Are you looking for someone?.."..Uday asked, and i could not help but stammer like an idiot...
"Yyyeesss.."..was my reply..which brought up new doubts.
"haa?..who?..do you know someone in my class?..you are a junior right?.."He asked seriously.
All i could do was run from there without answering and he shook his head and went away.
Chaaha tha yeh kahenge
Socha tha woh kahenge
Aaye woh saamne to, kuchh bhi na keh sake
Bas dekha kiye unhein ham
Dekhke tumko hosh mein aana bhool gaye
Yaad rahe tum aur zamaana bhool gaye
That day i decided that enough of looking at him, i would confess my love to him and for that i have to be CAPABLE of him first. For the next few years i joined a gym, went to parlours, and studied hard. I wanted to look best and be the best. I participated in the extra-curricular activities and also came first in some. I was very happy. Not just because i was succeeding but because 'HE' started noticing me more. Students who didn't knew my name wanted to be my friends and teachers appreciated me. But all i wanted was his appreciation.
"You did a great job. Congrats for the success!" was Uday's reply on my winning the play act as Cinderella. He brought a chocolate as well, to encourage me, but more than his gift his words and that smile coupled with his handshake was overwhelming for me. THAT WAS INDEED MY REWARD!!
The semester was coming to an end, and my excitement knew no levels as i would confess my feelings to him. But along with that there was mix feelings of whether he would accept it or not, and then he would leave for the city. Darjeeling was beautiful, but Uday had always wanted to be in a big city. I doubted if ever i would be able to see him again.
I shook all those feelings from my head and headed to the basketball court, with a bunch of flowers and chocolates in hand, where i knew i would find him. It was the last day of his school life but i knew, he would miss the playground. I ran to the place, to avoid further delay, and he was definitely there, but after what i saw, i stood still and my world seemed to end there.
Udayveer and Nayanika were romancing and were completely lost in each other. Nayanika, the hot and beautiful girl from Uday's class. Ofcourse they would be together. There was no question in that, but how was i this fool never to see it?
All my dreams shattered and feeling completely humiliated, i ran away from there with the flowers and chocolates finding the right place---Dustbin! That day was the end of Udayveer's chapter from my life.
I sat on a pavement near my home, and it was raining heavily. Everyone rejoiced that day and played with the water drops, but for me it was only the best way to hide my tears. That day onwards i started hating rain, as it made me remember those painful memories, but one thing i realised for sure---Feelings are something that needs to be confessed before its too late, and when its late, its better not to turn back and look back at them. It hurts more. i decided to study hard and become a doctor, and i promised myself never to lose confidence again. This Udayveer chapter had made me really strong and confident in life and i started winning, every challenge, be it studies, friends or boys. I became the most popular girl.
Today i am The Manyata Singhania, who has everything to her credit but not love. Somewhere deep down inside, the feelings for Uday remained, which i will never accept. I am 25 and still searching for the perfect man and i know, i would never be able to find someone like him, but whatever be the case, for my family's happiness i have to get married. My would-be husband is a doctor too and i don't want to know anything more except that. Who cares when i don't love him and he doesn't love me?
I am in the airport, to receive my would-be husband, who is coming from US only to meet me before our engagement.
As fate would have it, i again meet Udayveer, when i least expected to see him again. Even after so many years he still manages to look the same young and dashing Udayveer, on whom i used to drool for hours. He is approaching towards me, God knows for what reasons, with a smile plastered on his face, and looks at the pluck card that i am holding with the name of Mr. Singh
"Hi Manyata..your Manyata right?" Uday shook hands but he was equally surprised as he recognised her to be the same school girl who used to drool on her. She seemed to have quite changed, looked beautiful and smart.
"Hi...Udayveer"..came my reply and to my amazement I looked straight into his eyes, though the surprise evident in my voice, and to my utter embarrassment I found out that i am staring at him again."But what is he doing here?" I thought.
"i guess we know each other very well from school.." He started and I nodded, our eyes fixed on each other for few moments, and then there was a sudden thunderstorm leading to my screaming and Uday coming to reality. We both ran towards the car parking, but Uday signalled me to sit beside him, while he drives. I was a bit surprised but obeyed.
"Let me drive today as you must be quite soak" he looked at me from top to bottom and his sight sent a shiver down my spine as my heart sped faster than ever.
He drove the car and we decided to spent some quality time alone outside the city talking about the 10 long years and the happenings.
"Nayanika was never my love. In fact we were having our goodbye kiss that day..i had many girls in my life, but never fell for anyone as everyone seemed to be only interested in my riches or looks."
I was more than happy after hearing this and hugged him tight, which surprised Uday.
Feeling his uneasiness I hold myself back. I chose to keep silent for a few minutes. But some memories from past makes my words flow like waterfall.
"i have always loved you Uday, since the day i first saw you in school, i only tried to be capable of you, so that you accept me. I lost hope when i saw you and Nayanika, and decided to move on, but i have to accept that i am still waiting there, where i was 10 years back. Now i can't lose you anymore...i love you Uday, i love you.." i poured out my entire heart out but Uday didn't utter anything which made me scared.
It was raining heavily in the city's outskirts but the temperature was rising inside the car where we stared in silence at each other.
Uday got out of the car and opened the door of my side, but i had no idea what he was up to.
He played a romantic number in the car music system and looked at me
He made me stand on that isolated road and began..
"There was a girl in my school, who used to love me quietly, secretly look at me, but maybe she was scared of something. Scared to convey her feelings towards me. She send me chocolates and cards on every competition that i won, but still a fool like me could never realise what her heart felt for me. My eyes were blind not to see the love in those eyes, which only searched for mine. Today after 10years i have met that girl again, i don't remember her well, yet she still remembers me. But my heart is not a fool to let her go this time. I want to beg her to accept me, this stupid idiotic fool, who has never seen true love until now. I see love in these eyes and want to feel this love too, WITH YOU. WILL YOU MARRY ME?"
I was too overwhelmed to say anything, but nodded in acceptance as i was crying uncontrollably. When i had lost hope on someone, i suddenly got him.
Aa Kar Chale Na Jaana, Aise Nahin Sataana
De Kar Hansi Labon Ko, Aankhon Ko Mat Rulaana
Dena Na Beqaraari Dil Ka Karaar Ban Ke
Yaadon Mein Kho Na Jaana Tum Intezaar Ban Ke, Intezar Ban Ke
Bhool Kar Tumko Na Jee Payenge
Saath Tum Hogi Jahan Jayenge
Ham Koi Waqt Nahin Hain Hamdam
Jab Bulaaoge Chale Aayenge
That day was the best day for both of us. We got the love of our life and that day onwards rain made me happier than ever. As I got the best memory of my life on a rainy day, memories of Uday's proposal, his commitment for our new life and the love that we made inside the car, in that quiet highway made my monsoon memories extraordinary for eternity!...
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