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Punar Vivaah Ek Nayi Umeed
Punar Vivaah Ek Nayi Umeed

Thoughts 26th june, 2013 (Page 2)

deepa1122 IF-Stunnerz
deepa1122
deepa1122

Joined: 27 November 2012
Posts: 49691

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 7:48am | IP Logged
All I don't understand is how and when Sarita started loving raj 
As this was am arranged marriage and even before Sarita got married she knew Raj does not love her and from day one raj has behaved towards Sarita as if she does not exist 
So yeh pyaar kahan se aagye 

I think this is not sartias Payaar but her obsession to get raj 

All this she wants pati ka pyaar etc is just a put on job --my thinking she is like a parasite  what is hers in her mind will be hers o their wise witch self respecting girl will stick around for 10 yrs or more 

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

marianamisti73Myra.nelly

misti73 IF-Sizzlerz
misti73
misti73

Joined: 26 November 2009
Posts: 16250

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 10:03am | IP Logged
f she did not have th
Originally posted by ruchisahay

Great posts Misti and Angie Clap.Thanks Ruchi
I have stopped watching the show for last few days - my MIL found Raj-Divya romance repulsive; she was like why can't Raj wait till his divorce goes through. So now we watch old episodes of Sarabhai vs Sarabhai or some similar series at that time.I can understand your MIL's POV. I was also cringing last week when they showed Raj hell bent on applying lipstick on Divya. Raj and Divya are not husband and wife ...Divya is his ex-girlfriend so I guess many people might be having the same reaction.
 
Though I don't follow the show, I am still curious to know what happens to Sarita, Raj and Divya - so I keep up through posts and yours make a very good reading
 
I, for the most part, agree with your views on Sarita. What she feels for Raj is not love, no one can fall for someone as closed as Raj. But I still feel that she stuck to the marriage as she had no other choice - choices are not always about logistics, they are often about mental conditioning. If you start believing firmly that the love of your husband is your ultimate goal, your salvation and you do not and cannot have any other purpose in life, if the success and failure of your entire life depends of making your marriage a success, then how does having money or parents' support help? Money and support can only help if you know what to do with that and Sarita doesn't know that. Partly a fault of the people she grew with - wish they had told her that her life is not constrained by her husband's opinion about her, wish they had instilled some belief in her own self worth. She is very clingy and needy, with a big mouth and low self esteem. Ok I get your POV. I would have accepted that emotionally/mentally she does not have any choice because she does not know anything else than her marriage being her entire life and that husband is the ultimate goal in life. But she did walk out after she had her chat with Divya. That night she did realise that she is fighting a loosing battle and she did board the bus. So she did utilise her choice in leaving this marriage behind. She came back when Divya told her that she will help her get what she wanted. So to me it does not seem that mentally or emotionally she does not have the choice.If she thought that she this is what she has to live with then she would not have walked out that night. Thats why to me it seems like her choice regarding wanting all this at any cost. destructive - an isolated case of impulsively cutting her hand does not prove that. I am sorry Ruchi but I beg to differ. Self harming is an issue that I take very seriously. Usually it begins with isolated cases of cutting wrists or hands. But if it is not checked and help is not given then it becomes a pattern which usually has disasterous results. I have seen cases where things started as isolated cases of self harm They were ignored and they did lead to disaster. So I am unable to take it lightly. Also it was not only just cutting her hand...other signs of delberately courting injury were also there...infact afterterwards she told Divya in a very excited tone that what else dangerous stuff that she has to do. Divya by that point had realised the major blunder that she commited regarding the chandellier falling on Divya's head and she was trying to make Sarita understand that they are not going to do any more dangerous stuff.  Raj openly showing concern for her is very new to her and she is reveling in that.and also getting addicted to it.  I feel sorry and concerned that she too is moving toward her breaking point. I too think that she is moving towards her breaking point .
 
Divya - I feel sorry for the mess she is in but I am also alarmed by her stupidity. It was a party with lots of people - that chandelier could have fallen on anybody, and caused death or severe mutilation. There's no way she could time it to fall on Sarita only - anybody could have come up to talk to the hostess. Also, she must be having ultimate trust not only on Raj's intent (to save Sarita) but also on his reaction time. A nanosecond slow reaction from Raj and the prophecy would have come true and she would have spent rest of her life in prison. Also, if you do something once in the heat of a moment, that can be impulsiveness but if you continue repeating the same kind of mistake again and again, it's stupidity.True if one repeats the same mistake again and again then one can be considered as a stupid person. Its beyond my comprehension that how on earth did she even think that a dangerous stunt that is usually done in a controlled environment in a studio can be pulled off without any safety precaution ina real life situation. To me Divya is also walking on a tight rope. She has this highly clingy, bitter and insecure person after her...she is living in this mad house ..she does not have anyone to talk and is pressurised to give quick results. Wonder if all the pressure is pushing her to take these decisions which she would have herself avoided if she had calmly thought about it. Divya has been shown as as a very emotional person (although it is a different matter that she herself thinks thats she is a very practical person) and every time her emotional buttons are pushed she comes out with these plots which in the end does harm her. She needs a cool headed person beside her.  Emotional manipulation of Raj is stupid - does she truly think that Raj will fall for Sarita in 20 days. Don't know whether she thinks that or whether she thinks that Sarita is close to going off the rails and the quickest way to get her somewhat on stable gound is to make her believe that she did not waste those ten years of her life. She is also trying to make Raj see sense that whatever be the condition under which he married Sarita, the fact that he did marry her makes Sarita his responsibilty and that he cannot hide from it any more. Maybe she thinks that Raj will realise this and accept Sarita and maybe over time might care for her if not love her passionately. What will she do after that? Why can't she just say to Sarita - "sorry lady I don't have any plans because I don't know what to do". Well I wished that she said that to Sarita She should be proud of her accomplishments - that she could fill in the gap left by her parents in her siblings' life  and be so successful on her own. Instead she is wallowing in guilt that too for people like Raj and Sarita who have offered her no support till now. Yes to all here Or, maybe she is moving towards sainthood.Well all the main leading ladies of hindi soaps do attain mahanta.Wink
 
Raj - so finally he is guilty. I too think it's just concern for Sarita at the moment. But seriously folks, candle light dinner???? You don't do that out of concern - and on top of that, he's concerned that people will mistakenly assume his care for love.  I think he should stop and think what will he do if Sarita does not die in 20 days. It would be more cruel to get Sarita's hopes up and then crash them (strictly from Raj's point of view).  If the emotional manipulation of Raj is wrong, then what he's now doing to Sarita is also wrong. He said that he married Sarita as she was waiting for him at the altar - didn't he pause and think that after marriage, she would wait for him in their bedroom. Did he think that jilting a girl on altar was worse that brutally rejecting her on wedding night? Does he think that he can go back to be the indifferent Raj once again if Sarita does not die? Or is he prepared to keep up the charade his entire life. About Raj I am not able to comment because I have to see why is he going for this candle night dinner...Is it because he has finally having doubts that something is not right...since Shiela has already said that love will blossom in Sarita's life and he should be wary about it. So is he doing this to test waters and see what is actually happening? Yes he shoudl thik that what will happen is Sarita does not die but at this moment from his behaviour it seems that he is too paranoid that something might happen to Sarita and also that he and his family are guilty for mistreating Sarita.
 
 


Edited by misti73 - 27 June 2013 at 10:06am
misti73 IF-Sizzlerz
misti73
misti73

Joined: 26 November 2009
Posts: 16250

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 10:06am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Soniaman

Misti angie,ruchi and others,really nice analysis.Thank Sonia..i cant undrstand sarita...will not waste time on herLOL ok....to show care for sme one now we have to make special arrangements...kamu is great in all scenes.that she is..a complete entertainment. She always has me in giggles in her scene with Sohan lal and with Divya...,sheilaa and dadi annoying as usual oh yes...raj and divya,thinks that they are only masters of each other s lifeLOL true...LOL
misti73 IF-Sizzlerz
misti73
misti73

Joined: 26 November 2009
Posts: 16250

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 10:15am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Myra.nelly

Nice thoughts girls..Thanks Myra. agree with ur views abt all the characters...i am finding it very difficult to watch sarita's ignorance to whats happening around her..it is as if nothing matter to her other than what she wants...and I am finding it exasperating and irritating .my mind knt register how can she "love" a man who treated her like nothing...and now flying over the clouds when he is manipulated by divya to give her a lil attention...i am finding her very unrealistic..I won't say that I am finding her unrealistic person but a person who need help otherwise chances are that she migth go over the edge....ok she had dreams abt her husband but wonder how that his angry attitude and sleeping on the foor didnt rang any wrong bell in her head..she is not the only one ...many girls in abused elationship do feel "love" for their husbands and spend their entire life in abused relationship hoping that the object of teir affection will change. In real life the change usually does not happen and it usually ends in either brutal end to one's life or living life filled with bitterness, so that the next generation also continuos with this cycle of abuse.
Divya...what to say...shes pouring salt on her own wounds...hope so too she gets out of there before raj will hate her for what shes doing to him..Yes to all here.
misti73 IF-Sizzlerz
misti73
misti73

Joined: 26 November 2009
Posts: 16250

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 10:22am | IP Logged
Originally posted by deepa1122

All I don't understand is how and when Sarita started loving raj ..I don't think she loves Raj the human being...to her she loves Raj who is her husband.
As this was am arranged marriage and even before Sarita got married she knew Raj does not love her and from day one raj has behaved towards Sarita as if she does not exist 
So yeh pyaar kahan se aagye .It has got nothing to do with love that we know of between people who are in love. According to her they are married and she has looked after his comforts and in return he should also do the same...take care of her...pay attention to her needs and pay attention to her...this is probably what love to her means...a love that exists between husband and wife. She was aware that Raj loves someone else and did not want to get married but maybe she thought that with time he will get over it and give their relationship a chance. In real life also many people do think that way.

I think this is not sartias Payaar but her obsession to get raj..the companiosnhip and care that she was expecting has now turned into obsession.
All this she wants pati ka pyaar etc is just a put on job --my thinking she is like a parasite  what is hers in her mind will be hers o their wise witch self respecting girl will stick around for 10 yrs or more ...I won't say that she is a parasite but she is very possessive and insecure. So she might think that what is hers is hers...her asking Divya to take a pledge that even after she dies Divya will not marry Raj was very telling.
ruchisahay Senior Member
ruchisahay
ruchisahay

Joined: 15 February 2012
Posts: 393

Posted: 27 June 2013 at 12:42pm | IP Logged
@Misti
I agree that Sarita did leave once. But that was a response to an external factor Divya. Actually, I don't understand why she left that day - as if I understand rest of her actions Big smile - except maybe to add the masala scene where her superhero Divya stops her is the most clich manner.
 
About self harm - I haven't seen the actual scene so don't understand the extent - but the reason why I don't consider it serious is because it might develop into something far more dangerous or sinister but at this moment it isn't. Just like one high blood sugar report or one high BP do not qualify as disease (though they should raise the alarm). I have a few interns at office who joined us during their summer break - they often cook up a story of illness to visit the office's resident nurse (very pretty) and have on one or 2 occasions actually cut their hand a little to make her bandage that. And they are not even in love - it's just college type fun for them. I won't praise or encourage that but I don't see a future of self destruction for them. For Sarita, it was an emotional high that made her do something like that. If she repeats it, she qualifies your description. Until then, I will hold the judgement.
 
Agree with you on Divya - she needs someone practical and a better planner than her - who is not too emotionally involved. Or better still, she leaves the madhouse (but then that would be THE END)
 
About Candle light dinner, you were right Big smile - I concluded too soon from the misleading precap. But Raj is putting up a good act - maybe Mumbai is his final destination as well. Wiping Sarita's tears etc. was good improvisation.
 
 

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