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Traditions - To Keep or Discard? (Page 5)

TheGlamourgal Goldie
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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 12:29pm | IP Logged
A very well balanced episode.

Chanman scenes were so cute.

While watching the show  i was angrily shouting at manav for not supporting chch and there my mom who was watching with me was like see this what happens if you dont learn things before marriage. she is always at back of me and me  laziness at peak never even tried to learn . today she got a chance and was explaining me in between the  breaks .



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I-Heart-SanzshowviewerDiyaSGuinea

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 12:57pm | IP Logged
diya!! so nice to reply to you here ... after a long time! Hug

well, if you ask me, then I believe wearing a saree is not exactly a tradition, yes it looks like that in the way that is is made obligatory, but after all it it just another clothing style .. and nothing is more Indian than a saree, I think every Indian girl looks her most beautiful in a saree (and we have the perfect example of Sanaya Embarrassed) ..and Manav right now has no clue about how comfortable or uncomfortable Chanchan is in a saree, because honestly he doesnt really know her that much..they got married pretty fast .. and ofcourse he wouldnt expect her to wear sarees when they went out on the couple of dates that they did .. he thinks its completely normal for a girl to wear a saree and has grown up in a house where he saw all the married ladies wearing a saree, plus, he has seen Chanchan's mom and her dadi wearing sarees...so he thinks it is pretty normal for a girl to switch to sarees once she gets married and believes that Chanchan already knows this .. so I dont think he is wrong in expecting Chanchan to be able to carry off a saree... and even Chanchan is fine with wearing sarees.. maybe what should change is the frequency of wearing a saree, that a saree should be worn only during pujas and ther such big occasions and otherwise it is okay to wear salwar suits..which is pretty much how normal families function.. 

but as far as the pallu bit is concerned, yes I think that is one tradition that you should get rid off asap.. and it would be great if they show Manav realising it ..although how, I have no clue..so for me, it would be good if either of Ranjana or Sanjana realise about the unfairness of the pallu bit .. Kaumudi wouldn't, since she is the quiet mellow type of a bahu accepting whatever comes her way.. 

Also another tradition that needs to be changed is that DILs sit together on a dining table with everybody .. the entire family..cannot blame Chanchan for wanting her life pre marriage translate into her post marriage, but also agree with Ranjana when she says that things are bound to change after marriage..I liked the fact that Ranjana-Sanjana started thinking there was something amiss about all the factors that they percieved to be a "norm" in this house... 

Ranjana is super jealous of Chanchan right now because acc to her Chanchan has everything that she had dreamt of but couldnt have .. but I believe she would be the first one to agree with Chanchan's values and beliefs too, because in a way, she too wants to be a free bird, unlike Kaumudi and Sanjana.. 

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SiestagolpokobitaI-Heart-SanzshowviewerDiyaS

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:04pm | IP Logged

Nice post Diya !

I too was happy that they moved on from the muh dikhayi fast...too much of taunting ladies is just unbearable to watch.

Umaben's plans to let down Chanchan for using the rotimaker fall flat...it was good to see her sons speaking up whatever little it was...i was so expecting them to toe their mother's line on the rotis being hard so it was a welcome change.

I find this tradition of the DILs not eating with the rest of the family much more regressive than making them wear sarees. Many women wear sarees because they are comfortable and like to wear them and it is a beautiful dress. Its only the rigid enforcement that you cannot wear anything else even if you are uncomfortable which I find wrong. But the segregated eating is just Angry

How cute are these two Day Dreaming...the comfort level, the chemistry just awesomeEmbarrassed. Missed the 'jaan ' though...wish he says it again.Have to say the PH seems to have really worked on the romantic scenes after Anuj's entry...no doubt the actors have been great but even the execution has been really good - dialogues, background music, direction everything .
And now for the most controversial part of today's episode - Manav's reaction to Ranjana's tattling...i found it very realistic...yeah i am married LOL . In fact if Manav had supported Chanchan at that point, i would have been surprised. Women probably become wives and DILs the day they get married, men atleast Indian men take a longer time to become husbands. For him, it was just about wearing a saree and getting used to it...nothing more. They are not into the habit of dwelling on things unless explicitly explained. For the sake of the story also, Manav has to be torn to some extent between his mom, family and Chanchan. So as long as he supports her in some of her battles i am fine.

Divide and rule starts working...Ranjana is the one who will create problems for Chanchan but when Kaumudi is back, there will be some balance in favour of Chanchan. 

Is it just me or they are taking it too far with Sanjana's dumbness Confused





Edited by capricorn2006 - 24 June 2013 at 8:44pm

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lina545golpokobitaI-Heart-SanzDiyaSGuinea

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:56pm | IP Logged
Very nice post. A balanced summary with logic and humor.

Not all traditions are bad. So long they do not undermine a particular group or class,(especially women in most cases). For example, not allowing women to sit and have meal together with other family members is prehistoric and discriminatory. I am happy that CC expressed her disapproval on that. 
But asking married women to wear sarees is not a bad or discriminatory tradition. In fact, saree is not only traditional but also the signature wear of Indian women. So I won't say its a tradition to be outright discarded. But the question is whether somebody is comfortable in it. 
CC is not comfortable with saree but I don't mind if she takes the challenge and manages with that. (of course without pallu over her head!). I liked the idea that she wore ready made saree and that was absolutely perfect. The problem is with UB who didn't like the short cut and wanted CC to be embarrassed. 
However, regarding manav's reaction,i have a reservation. I expected him to express concern when he learnt that CC stumbled .. he should have asked if she was hurt! But I was brought back to reality. Manav is very much a real person of this society with flawed upbringing. He too would learn a lot from  CC in coming days..


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SiestashowviewerDiyaS

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 4:58pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by capricorn2006


Nice post Diya !

I too was happy that they moved on from the muh dikhayi fast...too much of taunting ladies is just unbearable to watch.

Umaben's plans to let down Chanchan for using the rotimaker fall flat...it was good to see her sons speaking up whatever little it was...i was so expecting them to toe their mother's line on the rotis being hard so it was a welcome change.

I find this tradition of the DILs not eating with the rest of the family much more regressive than making them wear sarees. Many women wear sarees because they are comfortable and like to wear them and it is a beautiful dress. Its only the rigid enforcement that you cannot wear anything else even if you are uncomfortable which I find wrong. But the segregated eating is just Angry

How cute are these two Day Dreaming...the comfort level, the chemistry just awesomeEmbarrassed. Have to say the PH seems to have really worked on the romantic scenes after Anuj's entry...no doubt the actors have been great but even the execution has been really good - dialogues, background music, direction everything .
And now for the most controversial part of today's episode - Manav's reaction to Ranjana's tattling...i found it very realistic...yeah i am married LOL . In fact if Manav had supported Chanchan at that point, i would have been surprised. Women probably become wives and DILs the day they get married, men atleast Indian men take a longer time to become husbands. For him, it was just about wearing a saree and getting used to it...nothing more. They are not into the habit of dwelling on things unless explicitly explained. For the sake of the story also, Manav has to be torn to some extent between his mom, family and Chanchan. So as long as he supports her in some of her battles i am fine.

Divide and rule starts working...Ranjana is the one who will create problems for Chanchan but when Kaumudi is back, there will be some balance in favour of Chanchan. 

Is it just me or they are taking it too far with Sanjana's dumbness Confused




You expressed exactly what I feel in bold part.

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SiestaDiyaS

kairavi. Senior Member
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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 6:40pm | IP Logged
I always love reading your posts and today's is as awesome as usual although I actually didn't have a problem with Manav telling CC she'll learn. For him this is the norm and all the married women in his home not only wear saris but manage all the housework in them too. As a guy he probably thinks it's one of those things all women know or actually like a giy he hasn't thought about it at all and is just going with gut instict especially when her heard his Mom was upset. When he said 'you'll learn' to me it sounded more like an encouragement in that it'll be ok, CC hasn't told him that she doesn't want to wear sari's or that she doesn't want to learn.
 I loved the family scene with the rotis - love seeing UB get trumped and the conversation about eating together was so needed, now this is what the show is about. Sony need to promote these scenes for the trp auntites. I loooved the sweet nothing and honestly didn't mind the interruption from Ranjana bhad tea and the good tea made with adrak and that's ginger just so's you know i can speak english bhabhi because I split my sides laughing.LOL
 
Oops I started reminiscing about the episode and realised i hadn't answered the question. Definitley a bad tradition and worse because it makes the bahu's a class below everyone that they are expected to wait till everyone is done, I could understand if all the women including UB and Mansi ate together but this is a way of keeping th bahus on the periphery of the family - they belong to the family but don't qualify as fullt fledged members.We all know CC is going to fight against these traditions but I'm really interested to know what Manav's reaction is going to be now that it's about his wife, because i'm assuming he's had no issue with being served hand and fooe tby his bhabhis - this show has so much potential, I'm loving it.


Edited by kairavi. - 24 June 2013 at 6:46pm

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showviewerDiyaS

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 9:01pm | IP Logged
nice post, my opinion - discard discard discard! Tongue  if its just a way to subjugate ur daughter-in-laws, make them feel lesser than u and the rest of the family, make them feel they r one rung below everyone else ... DISCARD Smile 

i'm including the sari wearing, the pallu covering, the eating later, everything - its all about control and power and dictating things just because u can. doesn't matter if sari's r beautiful, if the person wearing them finds it uncomfortable but has no choice then her rights have been diminished. 

it starts off with small things like this and then leads to bigger and bigger things until the girl becomes what 99% of indian dramas show her to be! respect should always be there, but thats it, i feel suffocated even thinking about that kind of environment and so many of my friends have had problems due to these so called traditions ... so, discard Tongue  

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DiyaSprincessunara

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Posted: 24 June 2013 at 10:13pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by siri271984

A very well balanced episode.

Chanman scenes were so cute.

While watching the show  i was angrily shouting at manav for not supporting chch and there my mom who was watching with me was like see this what happens if you dont learn things before marriage. she is always at back of me and me  laziness at peak never even tried to learn . today she got a chance and was explaining me in between the  breaks .





I had this discussion with my mom many times ...
When I was in college, I used to live in jeans and skirts all the time. I started working in a big public hospital and I had to wear Indian dress all the time ... the villagers would not accept us young girls as doctors, and if we were in skirts ... no way!!! So we dressed in salwar suits ... clothes which were appropriate and acceptable. One has to dress according to the place and occasion ... and learning to wear a saree is always good ... because it IS the ultimate Indian formal wear.

 

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