Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon

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Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon

~Bad Deal Series~ (TS) by Krani (Page 6)

_G1234_ Goldie
_G1234_
_G1234_

Joined: 21 June 2010
Posts: 1596

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 7:55am | IP Logged
You are an awesome writer no doubt about this, and u have impressed me again with this TS.
The starting scene of Khuhsi's confrontation was fantastically written, and as well as Arnav's plead, his apologize scene in the 2nd part. It was very intense and beautifully expressed their emotions. Loved it.

LadyR Goldie
LadyR
LadyR

Joined: 21 March 2012
Posts: 2389

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 9:16am | IP Logged
Both were really well written, Khushi's emotions came from within her , soul stirring... he had given her nothing but pain but she could never stop loving him.  Arnav saying sorry and begging her to stay was something they needed to show more of in the show, this  scene in your FF reminded me of the scene where he does apologize for yelling at her during his parents pooja..., why is it hard to see this guy crying, one wants to be Khushi and engulf him a hug and never ever let go..
Bhooma01 Groupbie
Bhooma01
Bhooma01

Joined: 26 September 2012
Posts: 188

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 9:36am | IP Logged
The first was stormy and angry and thunder and lightning filled - while the second was calmer, stronger and yet - deadlier.
 
LOVED the way Arnav begged Khushi to stay. But loved the way she refused and left even more. Beautifully written!!!
Arjuhisis IF-Sizzlerz
Arjuhisis
Arjuhisis

Joined: 21 May 2011
Posts: 22949

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 2:36pm | IP Logged
beautiful krani - where are u nowadays dear - I just happened to check the forum and found this thread - I thought u are not writing these days - glad to see u back krani
the TS was simply awesome - loved it
KaaminiJha Senior Member
KaaminiJha
KaaminiJha

Joined: 26 November 2011
Posts: 802

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 2:49pm | IP Logged
Epic work.
your stories keep the memory of IPKKND alive forever.
Thanks.
 
IDatIF Goldie
IDatIF
IDatIF

Joined: 04 March 2013
Posts: 1197

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 3:20pm | IP Logged
Welldone it was brilliant . Plz countinue
Crazy4Sobti IF-Dazzler
Crazy4Sobti
Crazy4Sobti

Joined: 21 April 2013
Posts: 2834

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 7:45pm | IP Logged

That was so well written, loved both the parts.ClapClap

 One of the highlights and best things about your writing is the way you synchronize the emotions with body language. As a reader this makes visualizing the story and characters very easy.

Arnav was man of few words and didn't know how to give words his emotions and was like a caged lion when was he was overwhelmed with emotions and most of the times it was his body, his hands and his eyes that spoke. His "sorry", "stay" and "Please" said so many things that he wanted to say. The love he had for Khushi, the guilt of not trusting her, remorse of putting her through pain, fear of losing her and void that will be left in his life after she leaves.

Glad Khushi stood her ground though she was in as much pain as Arnav she was as much a loser as Arnav it was important that she left to redeem her lost pride and individuality. 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

shona-li

shona-li Senior Member
shona-li
shona-li

Joined: 25 March 2012
Posts: 445

Posted: 23 June 2013 at 9:49pm | IP Logged
Oh damn Krani, this made my heart hurt bad. You've written the longing, hurt and silent suffering of theirs so beautifully I desperately wanted to know what happened when she left. As an OS in itself it's amazing. You've juxtaposed her entrance and exit of this contract and the differences is startling. My heart broke a little at Khushi's matter-of-factly statement that it was a bad deal, after they acknowledged their care and love for each other in a few short desperate and intimate moments. You have kept Khushi's self-respect and Arnav's inability to express himself in every scene which I adore. Yet their interactions tell more than what their words could say. All that angst was just right. I love the OS as it is but I would absolutely love to see you expand on this. The characters cannot let go. So can't I! Please would you write more about them? I'll give you jalebis!

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