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vijay

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vijay

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Joined: 09 December 2003

Posts: 6461

Posted: 17 July 2004 at 3:56pm | IP Logged

People wonder why they r paid so  much.............for just being on the phone. Take a look:

  *

  Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
  Customer "Ok."
  Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
  Customer: "No."
  Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
  Customer "No."
  Tech Support:: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
  Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

  *

  Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
  Tech Support:: "Did you install the update?"
  Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"

  *

  Customer:: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
  Tech Support:: "Tell me what you've done."
  Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."
  Tech Support:: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
  Customer:: "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
  Tech Support:: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
  Customer:: "What?"
  Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
  Customer: "No..."

  *

  Customer:: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
  Tech Support:: ?!%#$

  *

  Tech Support:: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
  Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

  *

  Tech Support:: "What type of computer do you have?"
  Customer:: "A white one."

  *

  Tech Support:: "Type 'A:' at the prompt."
  Customer:: "How do you spell that?"

  *

  Tech Support: "Is your computer on a separate telephone line?"
  Customer: "No." (clicks the button to log on to our service)
  Tech Support:: "Well then we can't-"
  Customer:: "It says 'no dial tone'."
  Tech Support: "That's because you're on the line with me right now.
  You need to-"
  Customer:: "No, that's not it. It does this all the time. I just have to try a few times, and it will let me through."
  Tech Support:: "No, ma'am. It's not even trying to dial right now because you're on the phone with me."
  Customer: "It must be busy. I'll try again later."

  *

  Tech Support: "What's on your screen right now?"
  Customer: "A stuffed animal that my boyfriend got me at the grocery store."

  *

  Tech Support:: "What operating system are you running?"
  Customer: "Pentium."

  *

  Customer: "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."

  *

  Customer: "I have Microsoft Exploder."

  *

  Customer: "How do I print my voicemail?"

  *

  Customer: "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
  Tech Support: "What does it say?"
  Customer: "Something about an error and non-system disk."
  Tech Support: "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
  Customer: "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."

  *

  Tech Support: "Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."
  Customer: "Is that Eastern time?"

  *

  Tech Support:: "What does the screen say now?"
  Customer: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
  Tech Support:: "Well?"
  Customer: "How do I know when it's ready?"

Contributed by: Akash Chatterjee

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tamanna

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tamanna

Joined: 06 May 2004

Posts: 117

Posted: 19 July 2004 at 12:48am | IP Logged

This is excellentClapClapClap.

I've just forwarded the same to to my tech dept........ their reaction? AngryAngryAngry

Thanks a ton..........Wink

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