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How good girls should dress

DonnaHarvey IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 17 November 2012
Posts: 13398

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 8:46pm | IP Logged
Here is a little story:
The other day me and my friends (quite a racially diverse bunch) were travelling back from a water park trip on a public transport bus (this bus was meant for the waterpark visitors picking up only those other passengers who had requested in advance). I was wearing a maxi dress over my bathing suit given I had done enough sun damage to my skin during the day. My friends were wearing tanks and shorts. The guys in our group were sans tees. There were two Indian men in their late 20s - early 30s who started on a long rant about how desi girls know their limits where as the white queen bees come out half naked as soon as the summer sun starts shining. I sat in the bus too ashamed to tell my friends the men were commenting on their clothing. Then, they began nodding at me in agreement of my dressing style as if telling me "good job for being conservative". Important to note that the shirtless guys were left alone and these seemingly critical men did not spare a glance toward their lack of clothing. Why is it that possessing a Y chromosome tells people to stay away from one's personal space but women are by default considered putting on a display for men?

Is it your business or your place to comment on how people dress? Why is such emphasis placed on and a direct connection made between morality and dressing?
Does one become a terrible person by dressing a certain way (outside of workplace and schools where dresscodes are applicable)?
Where do you stand on this issue of: the way you dress reflects what you think or feel about all important social issues, tells me how good of a person you are, how spiritual you are, etc.?

p.s.  This is probably the least offensive thing they said: girls. Every thing else I heard made me feel uncomfortable.

p.p.s. The title was meant to be sarcastic. I am NOT asking for advice on how I should dress. I think I am okay on that front.

Edited by DonnaHarvey - 20 May 2013 at 8:15am

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Forever-KA IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 April 2009
Posts: 5411

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 9:51pm | IP Logged
a- When one observes one forms an opinion or a view.
b- Now question is should we express or not express a view/take/opinion?
c- I dont think it is our business expressing our view about random people out there. it is their life, their environment, their situation, their mindset, their values, their culture, their beliefs and their choice keeping all the earlier theirs in mind.
d- where one can express is in case of people who matter to you.
Should we form opinion about character (good or bad) based on dress. This is a highly subjective question as we need to define what is good or bad character. I dont think there is good or bad when it comes to character of a person. Most are in between. You find good and bad things in all. Therefore no I dont think we can base it on dress alone.

Edited by King-Anu - 19 May 2013 at 9:53pm

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Summer3 IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 24 September 2007
Posts: 44425

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 10:40pm | IP Logged
Yes Dress whichever way suits the occassion for girls. I do like elegant dressings.
But try not to dress such that it invites too much male attention. One can become a victim of something undesirable like molest and rape !

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.EdwardCullen. IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 01 July 2011
Posts: 12174

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 10:56pm | IP Logged

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Zairean IF-Dazzler

Joined: 04 June 2012
Posts: 3660

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 11:46pm | IP Logged

Dressing should enhance comfort level, as far as you are okay with what you wear there isn't a problem. According to what you said above, yourself and your friends were returning back from water park , and while on a touring to such a place you certainly can't be expected to wear a salwar or a saree and swim if at all. There aren't any rules how a girl should dress in public or whatsoever especially not as being a "good girl". You wear according to situations you are in, if you wear swimsuits and go for work place you are defo to get stares from men. So it is dressing according to the scenarios nothing more than that. Good or bad, dress doesn't speak for itself until you know the person personally.

As for the men I completely agree with you, showing off bare chest or flexing muscles and biceps by the men is considered "civil" and not a big issue. Even if you bring up such issues either people turn a deaf ear or demand it to be their birth right and state it as "mardangi". When women are placed in the same picture, some outrageous comments are thrown their way. So my advice to you is, ignore them. When you feel comfortable in your clothes and think its suitable for the circumstances there is nothing to worry about. 

Edited by ITrustMyHeart - 19 May 2013 at 11:46pm

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-Believe- IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 03 December 2005
Posts: 25723

Posted: 19 May 2013 at 11:54pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Summer3

Yes Dress whichever way suits the occassion for girls. I do like elegant dressings.
But try not to dress such that it invites too much male attention. One can become a victim of something undesirable like molest and rape !

^ Summer ji,kisi mahaaan ne pahale kaha dha na...Girls dont dress for guys, they dress for themselves. If they dressed for guys they would be naked all the time..TongueLOL

Just wanna say,always wear your clothes well... dress should reflect your tastes, interests..and try to find your signature piece or look...make it simple and sweet... if you feel good ,if you are comfortable, then you can wear any type of dress depend on time and situation.Smile

Zairean IF-Dazzler

Joined: 04 June 2012
Posts: 3660

Posted: 20 May 2013 at 12:15am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Summer3

Yes Dress whichever way suits the occassion for girls. I do like elegant dressings.
But try not to dress such that it invites too much male attention. One can become a victim of something undesirable like molest and rape !

What actually you mean is that dress wakes up the male desires in a man and they resort to doing inhumane activities? It is the dress that invites such heinous crimes for testosterone charged men ?

Can't believe you actually said this  after the havoc created by the delhi rape case on dressing morals Ouch

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thegameison IF-Sizzlerz

Jedi of CC
Joined: 01 July 2010
Posts: 22823

Posted: 20 May 2013 at 2:33am | IP Logged
The way I dress does reflect how I think and feel. I think and I feel just how hot it is these days and hence I wear shorts and T-shirts. Ideally nobody is in the position to comment on how I dress because I wear what I am comfortable in. I feel no shame in admitting that the worthy commentators you mentioned are leech-like in general and sometimes I cover myself 'rightly' because of em. Why? Because I may be comfortable in those clothes, I am however very uncomfortable of how these people think and may react. They pose themselves as righteous, that by no means means that they aren't in fact the biggest perverts alive. They are dangerous and primitive, these lunatics. They do now and they would always believe that men are supreme and women, their subordinates. They do not have the right to tame us but they don't know that, such jerks and they never will. It's all in their heads and it's not going anywhere. 


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