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What do I do now? Help me please?

Nyasa448 Newbie
Nyasa448
Nyasa448

Joined: 22 April 2013
Posts: 34

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 10:24am | IP Logged
I'd posted a very embarrassing personal confession in a confession group on FB, and then shared it on my profile to keep it in view and not have to dig it out from thousands of posts all the time. That was incredibly stupid of me *WHY DID I DO IT?*.It was about an incident about a senior at college and how I had developed a crush on him.
A classmate saw the shared confession and made a comment tagging a few other friends.After seeing her comment, I deleted it(the confession) immediately from my wall.

Now, the confession was anonymous, but the way I'd described my crush and the incident surrounding him was quite identifiable to everyone from our college, and they had a faint suspicion about my crush.To make things worse, the friend who saw it is a chief gossip-monger.And I've written all sorts of personal embarrassing stuff about my fantasies and daydreams. Now all the rumors get confirmed. And even though I've deleted it, I saw that the friend dug it up from the original confession group and shared it. What do I do? I'm feeling SOOO embarrased?


PS: Just advice me on what to do. No judgmental comments required.

Dexterkilaila IF-Sizzlerz
Dexterkilaila
Dexterkilaila

Joined: 16 June 2012
Posts: 18196

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 1:05pm | IP Logged
You basically have 3 choices

1. Make light of the situation. Joke around about it and confess that it was you but so what.  Basically, explain your side of the story. 

2. Delete your FB, alienate yourself from all forms of social groups and stop seeing anyone. 


3. Keep denying it. Feign ignorance about the whole situation. Basically, become a good liar. 


What I'd do in your situation is number 1,  own it and make the best of a bad situation.  The cat is already out of the bag, it is pretty much impossible to put it back in. So go and tell your friends and the guy that you crushed on him and that yes it was kind of lame to put it out there anonymously but hey it is what it is. If you tell them point blank, they will respect you and not judge you. If it is too difficult or embarrassing for you to talk to them face to face, I would write an email explaining the situation from your POV start to finish and CC everyone involved on it. You seem to have a good grasp of English so if I were you, I'd try to make the confession email as funny as possible instead of depressing or lame. 


The bottom line is this, when an embarrassing situation happens, you can either let others force you into shame and self-blame or you can pick yourself up, own the situation, put your side of the story out there and move along like nothing happened. What I have learned from my own bitter and embarrassing life experiences over the years is that whenever I have confessed to a lie or a predicament people have responded really well to my situation. So I advice you to do the same. 

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Nyasa448 Newbie
Nyasa448
Nyasa448

Joined: 22 April 2013
Posts: 34

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 8:04pm | IP Logged
THANK YOU so much. And no, I assure you this isn't fake at all. I discovered this shite (that the confession was re-shared) yesterday evening, and basically got thrown. I don't knw any online websites meant specifically for quick advice, and I needed it real immediate. I turned to IF finally, without any option left.
But thank you again, even a few reassuring words are hard to come by, people are so mean on the internet. :(

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Dexterkilaila

Dexterkilaila IF-Sizzlerz
Dexterkilaila
Dexterkilaila

Joined: 16 June 2012
Posts: 18196

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 8:09pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by Nyasa448

THANK YOU so much. And no, I assure you this isn't fake at all. I discovered this shite (that the confession was re-shared) yesterday evening, and basically got thrown. I don't knw any online websites meant specifically for quick advice, and I needed it real immediate. I turned to IF finally, without any option left.
But thank you again, even a few reassuring words are hard to come by, people are so mean on the internet. :(

Yes people are mean on IF. More than mean, they are immature. It's the age. Most are teenagers or sheltered adults with no life experience so they have a tendency to talk out of their arse. Don't pay any heed to them and don't let this situation bog you down. We've all been through many embarrassing situations and have survived to tell tales of them. Shit happens, you just have to pick yourself up and move right along. Good luck to you :)

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Dexterkilaila IF-Sizzlerz
Dexterkilaila
Dexterkilaila

Joined: 16 June 2012
Posts: 18196

Posted: 24 April 2013 at 9:23pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by .Dr3viL.

Dexters advice is as always sound and i agree you have 3 options, i am however going to tell you that option 1 and 2 do not apply to you! and i pray you haven't owned up to it! owning up works well if you are dexter... when you completely fry yourself and get caught out and 1/2 way through apologising you have already put yourself in another fry pan. Others are left baffled are supportive of the her new predicament rather then completely as peace with the previous! and so on and so on. Also at this point i'll mention - dexter doesn't get caught .. she has such feeble conscience that she owns up by herself! 

you and i .. are mere mortals in comparison with her.. so i suggest you deny.. you lie.. you make up stories so grand that everyone gets confused. you like to write fantasy stories, so that makes you are an ARTIST! you need inspiration from here and there and there and this facebook story sparked your interest and you thought it would fit in perfectly with your other stories .. remember you are an ARTIST! you dont have time to crush on ONE particular senior because HELLO you crush on everyone, that you cant even remember their names! 

and if you have trouble sleeping with that at night.. just remember you tell the truth when someone deserves to know it such as if you are in a committed relationship and your partner deserves to know whats going on in your heart or who you have kissed.. these people will make fun and judge you so dont worry.. and EVERYONE makes mistakes even them, so dont let it spoil your mood. 


Stop feeling her mind with gibberish. LOLYou and I both know owning up to it in a self-deprecating manner is the best solution. That removes the self-pity aspect as well as makes her less vulnerable to people's snide remarks and judgments. 


Having said that, fabricating also sounds like a sane advice provided the recipient is a good liar. Not everyone is. If her lie is caught, she will be in a bigger predicament. If she can pull off  fabrication with utmost sincerety, she should take your advice.


Edited by Dexterkilaila - 24 April 2013 at 9:30pm

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Nyasa448

Dexterkilaila IF-Sizzlerz
Dexterkilaila
Dexterkilaila

Joined: 16 June 2012
Posts: 18196

Posted: 24 April 2013 at 9:40pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by .Dr3viL.

hello Dr S3X how are you

Have you started talking to yourself these days?Tongue
Dexterkilaila IF-Sizzlerz
Dexterkilaila
Dexterkilaila

Joined: 16 June 2012
Posts: 18196

Posted: 24 April 2013 at 9:55pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by .Dr3viL.

Originally posted by Dexterkilaila

Originally posted by .Dr3viL.

hello Dr S3X how are you

Have you started talking to yourself these days?Tongue


im DrLove around here you are DrSex ... everywhere else I am Evil and your are Dex 

Whatever you say, your majesty.LOL
Nyasa448 Newbie
Nyasa448
Nyasa448

Joined: 22 April 2013
Posts: 34

Posted: 26 April 2013 at 7:27am | IP Logged

Hi, Dexter, I reported the post on my friend's wall and got it removed. I didn't go to college for a few days after that. I did today, and apart from a snide smile here and there, nobody said anything directly. Hope it'd be all okay after a while. 


Thanks for being by me . Hug

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