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ArHi Tales:Dhadkanein *Thread One* (Page 85)

avni_barun IF-Dazzler
avni_barun
avni_barun

Joined: 28 June 2012
Posts: 3489

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:14am | IP Logged
beautifully written...
i wanted that kiss 2 get completed n here u gave that...
superb writing...

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

1chilly IF-Sizzlerz
1chilly
1chilly

Joined: 01 December 2012
Posts: 12496

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:17am | IP Logged
Semanti, you are one of those rare writers who makes even a description interesting to read. 
This is one of the finest pieces I ever read. 
You have described so well the case of unrequited love one suffers from at this age. The way she looks at him from a distance, how dhe goes to watch his games without knowing a thing about Ice Hockey. Though happily in Khushi's case it was not unrequited. 
Loved your take on the payal scene. Beautiful. 
Also loved how you described the way Khushi slips as soon as she puts a foot on the ice. Happens to all novices, which is why I never want to try it. Don't want to make a fool of myself, specially as I don't have Arnav to help me. 
And then came the kissing scene. Beautifully written. I had goosebumps reading it. 
Khushi got her Christmas gift. 

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

Manisha. IF-Dazzler
Manisha.
Manisha.

Joined: 20 July 2012
Posts: 2791

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:24am | IP Logged

firstly juhi thank u so much for introducing semanti...

semanti I take a bow...every word described so much...so for me this was much more than 5000 words...
 
I just loved the fact that 3/4 of the story was covered without any dialogues...it was a beautiful description of their background, preferences, priorities, emotions and inhibitions...and off course their silent monologues...the witty monolgues when they were skating were so expressive and I could relate it with myself coz most of my conversations with myself are funny and stupid...
 
needless to say your adaptation of the Diwali sequence was outstanding..thank u for completing the kiss...it reminds me of the fact that yeh sirf FF ki duniya me hota hai...so as khushi says FF ki duniya me rehna hi acha hai semati ji kyunki IPK ke duniya me sirf sapne toot tey hai...
 
juhi ji ab aap ki baari...its just getting better..loving it...
 
and all the comments on pg 1 are also so wonderful...
 
 

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

avantika_2012 Goldie
avantika_2012
avantika_2012

Joined: 16 March 2012
Posts: 1467

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:25am | IP Logged
Wonderfully written! 

Keep it up! :D

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

farha5556 IF-Dazzler
farha5556
farha5556

Joined: 19 March 2012
Posts: 2504

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:26am | IP Logged
loved it,continue soon.

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

jeya0301 Goldie
jeya0301
jeya0301

Joined: 11 October 2010
Posts: 1280

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:26am | IP Logged
Awesome..:) loved it ..:) thnk u..:)

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

lakraj80 IF-Dazzler
lakraj80
lakraj80

Joined: 05 April 2012
Posts: 3584

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:42am | IP Logged
Hey semanti, mind blowing!! Beautifully written. Thanks for the pm.

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

katunkka Senior Member
katunkka
katunkka

Joined: 22 June 2012
Posts: 628

Posted: 17 April 2013 at 1:48am | IP Logged
Okay I feel like anytging I ssy will be injustice to what you wrote. Infact I'm mad that it ended. Omg the sexiest piece I ever read, simply!

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CheshireBilliEXPELLIARMUS

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