Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon


Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon

ASR, its Lavanya! (Page 5)

Arshics IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 22 February 2012
Posts: 15789

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:46am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Horizon

Originally posted by arshicritic

@ Horizon and Sulu_123

Hmm, this is a tricky one

Why I am so upset with him on La issue?

Three counts:

1. He invited her to live in his house, just out of an ego tussle with Nani, but she took it to be a sort of 
    affirmation of their relationship

2.  She was leaving, but he went back for her, even then he knew it for Khushi, but La's joy and hug -

he knew she read it as an acknowledgement

3.  Announcing his intent to marry La - that was the cruellest cut of all - he knew she loved him,

she had directly said it so many times, to his face, yet he went ahead and announced - mind you

announced not asked, his desire to marry her, just to escape his feelings for Khushi.

He was always rude to her, ticked her off, and she was just hanging on to his every word seeking approval.

Ya she was an idiot too, blinded and in denial

Ya the wedding idea was planted by Khushi, and stemmed out of her insecurity, but she cared for

him and always showed it

She clung to him and ignored all the warning signals - shows even the smartest of women can turn into perfect idiots when in love

He was living in his own world and never ever gave a thought to her feelings

Just by not saying I love doesn't absolve him of taking her for granted, taking her feelings for granted

I agree, the moment he realised the full impact of what he was doing, he broke up and it was handled very well,

but till then he was being ASRish throughout - take what I want, without sparing a thought for anyone's feelings

@Red, I agree that knowingly or unknowingly he did hurt La. But did he take her for granted or commanded her to remain his GF amidst all this? NO. It was her choice to remain with him even though his feelings for Khushi were evident to her than anyone else starting with the day when he called La and asked her for Khushi's phone number the night after the rain hug.
The reason why La doesn't evoke much sympathy in me, probably as much as she deserves, is becos her love (was that even love?) was shown to be utterly shallow at the start in instances like where she would be happy head over heels even with his sending a designer hand bag not even by himself but by some one else and was even fine with his as you said ASRish behavior where he would n't spare her in the office. It would have been far more respectful if she herself broke off with him. Which always made me wonder what is it in him that she is clung to, no obvious pouring of affection, no commitments, no nothing.. that at some level makes one wonder it was his wealth and power, let alone his gorgeous looks!
Will this absolve him of the hurt he has given to her completely? NO. But the fact that he never intended to cheat her will remain in his support. He knew he was running away from Khushi for what ever reasons, but he has decided to lead his life with his head rather than his heart. Head is La and heart is Khushi, and he thought he could do it, just like he has spent the last 12+ yrs of his life. And probably if khushi truly did get married and disappeared from their lives, he would have succeeded in his attempt too.

Your arguments as always are very compelling

ya to start with she was shallow , but later I think she really did love him

As to what she saw in him, probably the same thing that we saw, the man was magical, like us,  she too couldn't help being in love with him!

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Horizon IF-Dazzler

Joined: 29 February 2012
Posts: 4010

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 12:08pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by enova2011

I know this topic is about ASR and La and whether or not he really wronged her, and the arguments are great on both sides. I admit, I wished they could have shown in a flashback how the relationship started, and I'm just going to assume that La initiated the relationship. I don't know why, but I can never picture ASR asking a girl if she wanted to be his girlfriend, I just sort of picture him going along with it and then laying down his terms.

Anyway, there was one part of the show that really bothered me, and it was the Khushi-LA equation after Diwali miss-kiss. Now I know that Khushi is a small town girl, naive about the world, men, etc., but I don't care what village you're from, when a man has you pinned against the wall with his face in your hands and is moving his lips towards yours, you kind of know what is going to happen. I mean, she must have anticipated it because she closed her eyes. It was a great Arshi moment, but  what bothered me is that there didn't seem to be a reflection from Khushi's part on how this betrayed La. Now, I do get that she is overwhelmed and confused about what he just did, and she's thinking about her own heartbreak, but even when she was being fake happy to La after he announced his engagement to her, she never has a reflection about what this means for La, how they both sort of betrayed her. Just because they didn't complete the kiss doesn't mean that they still weren't betraying her. Khushi was only thinking about her sadness and her heartbreak at the time, which is justifiable, but for a girl who values everyone else's happiness, and has a very strict moral code, this actions just seemed un-Khushi like to me.

I mean, she knew immediately that she had to tell Anjali the truth about Shyam betraying her, so why didn't she see it here? I don't think the makers of the show would have actually shown Khushi telling LA that 'hey, your live in bf tried to kiss me,' but all i wanted to see is some inner dialogue about how Khushi recognized the betrayal to La from both herself and ASR.  Yes, ANjali and Shyam were married so there's a slight difference there, but for all intents and purposes, LA and ASR were in a live in, where they were supposedly doing everything a married couple do, (as LA told Khushi) why did Khushi not think this was wrong as well? Is it because she never viewed their relationship seriously because there was no mangalsutra?

I feel that if Khushi had not been interfering in LA-ASR's personal life and brainwashing La about marriage, that the live in would have continued as it was meant to until this scene. The discord between La and ASR stemmed from La changing her thinking about marriage. If she had stuck to the original terms, then they would have continued on and eventually ASR would have broken up with her when he realized that KHushi meant more to him, that he was falling for her.

Also, yes ASR stood up for La against his family, but if the makers of the show allowed it, ASR could have stood his ground that La was to share his room. He just sort of let it go after Nani insisted.

@Agree with you. Lavanya unknowingly became the scapegoat in Arshi realizing their feelings for each other. The vacillation of Khushi, from this nave girl who would classify her inner feelings, dhaks dhaks for a man to acidity to the woman who is supposedly well read into scriptures and firmly aware of the values and virtues of the institute of marriage,was rather blurred.

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kondhili IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 16 October 2012
Posts: 9965

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 3:39am | IP Logged
I can see from the above various posts that this scene has been grilled brutally but i am sure all of us will agree that every single person felt sorry for Lavanya that day.

And her this one dialogue conveyed to ASR the pain she was undergoing and the unfairness that was meted out to her by ASR.  
That's why she became our darling cause she clearly did not deserve this and she should have also got her share of little rainbow in the end..


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ky.chandratre Goldie

Joined: 12 February 2012
Posts: 1153

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 6:50am | IP Logged
MrDarcyfan IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 21 September 2011
Posts: 22983

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 7:04am | IP Logged
That scene is one of my favourite scenes from IPK! This was the moment Lavanya finally accepted that she had lost! That it was over! She accepted that an unassuming girl from Lucknow had managed to do what she never could! Dominate ASR's thoughts!

If she knew before that ASR was in love with Khushi, she chose not to see it. But in that moment she stopped pretending! ASR too had to stop pretending! At least with Lavanya. He had to admit to her that he never felt for her what she felt for him!! It was the bitter but plain truth! Finally accepted by both parties who were about to make a huge mistake by committing to each other!!

To this day, that scege will be a highlight moment in IPK! I respected Lavanya like never before in that scene! Loved both Sana and Barun in this scene. They were both amazing!!

Edited by MrDarcyfan - 22 April 2013 at 7:05am

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ArshiAms IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 24 September 2012
Posts: 10185

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 7:13am | IP Logged
really nice
.Brooke. IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 29 April 2012
Posts: 11313

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 7:45am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Omoraboti

I loved that scene. And I loved how you  have protrayed everyone's stand.

Indeed, Lavanya was the loser here. But I have to disagree when you say he treated her like a doormat. He did not. Yes, he was not the romantic kind of boyfriend around her but he respected her. He did stand for her against his family. He did say her that she was one of the very few who could steal 10 minutes of his time. She mattered to him. Yes, probably not in the way Khushi did. He liked her .. but no, he did not love her. I cannot blame him here because he never knew what "love" is until he met Khushi.
ASR is flawed but he was just. Whenever he realized his fault, he rectified it.

Agree Omoraboti.The scene was very intense realization for both ASR and Lavanya.

He never treated her badly.Rest you said it beautifully. 
nishaipkkdian Goldie

Joined: 28 September 2012
Posts: 1953

Posted: 22 April 2013 at 7:47am | IP Logged
Originally posted by arshicritic

She was the original victim of ASR

the one who put her life on hold for him

the one who had a list of his likes and dislikes and never crossed him

the one who completely transformed herself,

gave up a successful career in fashion industry for him

spent her days learning "wifely" skills and chit chatting with mami

when she was cut out for so much more

And all for a man, who never saw her worth

Who treated her like a doormat

walked all over her, and never spared a thought for her

And she the brave woman

Put up with it

because she loved him, flaws and all

She, who knew him better than he gave her credit for

She, who had been avoiding the reality, because she loved him too much to give up

The only one who made every effort to make the relationship work

Now she finally faced the truth

with courage, dignity, pride and strength

and walked out with her head held high, but her heart broken

   She is a victim of ASR. No doubt about it. But only from the time he announced his marraige with her. It was very short time between the announcement and breakup. The remaining things whatever she did for ASR is not his fault. He never promised her that he will treat her right. She is aware of his anger issues. Even he said only important person in his life is Di on his Di anniversary. She even asked him nobody else other than Anjali, He said yes. He never promised her about his love to her or marriage. She developed that feeling because of Kushi. He never asked her to transform her for his sake. Actually he did not like her change at all. He never tolerate when Nani insulted her like he did with Kushi when Mamiji taunted her a lot.

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