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Ovi is too much DT note pg19 (Page 22)

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:21pm | IP Logged
Ovi didn't really steal Arjun. She put forth a deal (which seems to be her greatest crime/blunder) and Purvi accepted. 

I remember someone on this thread mentioning how Ovi chose to listen to Punni and then acted in a vicious way. Punni knows how to stoke the flames, but Ovi seems to have learned that Punni is not to be trusted. Purvi has had her trust betrayed by Punni so many times and yet she still chose to believe in Punni. And it's been over a year since she came to know of Punni's wicked side, so how she she hasn't become more cautious about her dear Punni Tai? 

Anyways, back to Arjun. Like I said before, he is not worth the trouble. Ovi should have not even put a deal to get this guy. I always thought that Arjun should have moved heaven and earth to tell Ovi that he could not continue on with the engagement. Just calling her a few times and not getting her on the line is not it. He should have made things clear with Ovi before professing his love for Purvi. 

Arjun led Ovi on even after their official engagement. I understand she had family issues to deal with, but come on dude, you knew they were sisters before both the girls knew themselves. Why play them in such a way? And he's proven that he isn't a good friend to Ovi at all, forget husband. He hasn't fulfilled his responsibilities as a husband and I have only seen Ovi trying to make the marriage work ever since she got married to him. All he's good enough for now is just saying "Ovi relax, relax." 

I think Ovi should have walked out of this marriage the day that Arjun slapped her and humiliated her in front of her entire family and told everyone he still had the hots for Purvi. She was ready to leave but he didn't let her because Purvi made him stay in the marriage and consummate it. Arjun consummating his marriage with Ovi isn't a testament to his love and devotion to Purvi; it's just pure foolishness and spinelessness. 


Edited by salvatore-nina - 11 April 2013 at 11:25pm

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:22pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by hillydee

Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee


Just to be technically correct, if you fall in love with a man and find out that he is engaged, and your personal value system does not prod you to leave him alone at all costs, instead you wait patiently for him to slaughter his fiancee, yes the accurate terminology is that you are a man stealer, boyfriend stealer, fiancee stealer, whatever word best suits. 

The fact still remains you are a stealer. Nice girls from nice homes don't do such things.  Also, their Mothers would not encourage such a marriage. 


Ah, you see I was careful, LOLI did not say man stealer, boyfriend stealer, or fiance stealer, I said "husband stealer, gold-digger, mother stealer and baby stealer" and Purvi is none of these.  Wink

Your definition makes Ovi a stealer too, she stole Arjun right back.  At least Arjun was not engaged to Ovi when Purvi and him fell in love with each other and Purvi knew Arjun did not want Ovi. Purvi did stay away from Arjun after the engagement, he declared his love for her to Manav in front of the D, broke off his rishta and relentlessly pursued her in the chawl.  

But Ovi has no such excuse, she knew Arjun was engaged to Purvi, she knew he loved Purvi and yet went right ahead to steal him.  

Good girls don't do that either, mothers don't encourage or approve of putting valued relationships at stake, bartering your dad's happiness (I will refrain from saying mother's happiness in deference to those who have said Archana did not raise Ovi so there was no love lost between them) because you are blinded by your own selfish need to acquire your sister's soon to be husband. 
You can't steal something that was already yours, love or no love they were engaged before he fell in love with PurviWink Husband stealer is not far off either, because Purvi never made herself that unavailable in Arjun's sight..She never practised to mind her own business.Wink Indirectly she is a Mother Stealer, to someone who is hurt that their Mother did not find for her and chose to raise another babyBig smile  Baby Stealer is kinda weird, but it is probably coming from the fact that she breast fed Pari, it would not be my choice of words though, more like Deceiver Wink

Ovi had Arjun first, and I am  disappointed that you are ignoring your Indian Sanskaars to make your point.  

My dear, no pointing fingers at me or my Indian sanskars, uncalled for and not allowed on the forum but I shall let it pass this one time. 

Arjun did not belong to Ovi because there was no engagement.  Patrikas are exchanged and families enter into a formal agreement of marriage at a "proper" engagement.  Moreover, Arjun hid the fact and did not tell Purvi that he had agreed to go along with Ovi's marriage idea.  

Husband stealer is not right either, just because Ovi is paranoid, Purvi should not be required to take care to avoid Arjun's "sight".  Ovi should be laying down these rules to her husband.  I will agree with the deceiver bit but mother stealer is way off base, doesn't make sense even for Ovi to believe that.  It is not the baby's fault that Savita aaji kept Ovi apart from her Aai and her Aai to eke out her lonely years decided to adopt said baby. 

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:23pm | IP Logged

Purvi could be considered blinded by her selfish need to get her sister's husband, because even after she knew the situation, that Ovi was her sister and was engaged to Arjun, she was still willing to go ahead with the marriage, she even sealed the deal the night before, now a baby is here.
You can't get any colder than that.

Anyways, I can debate with you forever and ever about this.  

The facts are:

 Arjun and Ovi were engaged first.

The deal was by a woman scorned, which hath no fury.

The deceivers agreed to the deal, that threw out even the genuineness of their so called love

Purvi underestimated Archana, Archana always sided with strangers, so that is why she Planned Purvi's wedding in a jiffy.  Purvi never needed to agree to this deal.  Archana is older than her, she needs to learn her place and not try to make decisions for Archana and people older than herself such as Punni.

Ovi had no obligation to a Mother who never fought for her, never brought her up, and had no problem marrying off her fiancee with her adopted sister, without even giving her time to deal with the situation.

Ovi never got a chance to get over Arjun, because everyone was planning a wedding while she was planning her funeral

There was no loyalty for Ovi from anyone in her family.

Once again Ovi has lost something, more important than any dumb man, her child.  and Once again she was not allowed to appropriately grieve, to get over this, thanks to people who call themselves loved ones. 

I pray no one I know has to go through this.


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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:24pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee

Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee


Just to be technically correct, if you fall in love with a man and find out that he is engaged, and your personal value system does not prod you to leave him alone at all costs, instead you wait patiently for him to slaughter his fiancee, yes the accurate terminology is that you are a man stealer, boyfriend stealer, fiancee stealer, whatever word best suits. 

The fact still remains you are a stealer. Nice girls from nice homes don't do such things.  Also, their Mothers would not encourage such a marriage. 


Ah, you see I was careful, LOLI did not say man stealer, boyfriend stealer, or fiance stealer, I said "husband stealer, gold-digger, mother stealer and baby stealer" and Purvi is none of these.  Wink

Your definition makes Ovi a stealer too, she stole Arjun right back.  At least Arjun was not engaged to Ovi when Purvi and him fell in love with each other and Purvi knew Arjun did not want Ovi. Purvi did stay away from Arjun after the engagement, he declared his love for her to Manav in front of the D, broke off his rishta and relentlessly pursued her in the chawl.  

But Ovi has no such excuse, she knew Arjun was engaged to Purvi, she knew he loved Purvi and yet went right ahead to steal him.  

Good girls don't do that either, mothers don't encourage or approve of putting valued relationships at stake, bartering your dad's happiness (I will refrain from saying mother's happiness in deference to those who have said Archana did not raise Ovi so there was no love lost between them) because you are blinded by your own selfish need to acquire your sister's soon to be husband. 
You can't steal something that was already yours, love or no love they were engaged before he fell in love with PurviWink Husband stealer is not far off either, because Purvi never made herself that unavailable in Arjun's sight..She never practised to mind her own business.Wink Indirectly she is a Mother Stealer, to someone who is hurt that their Mother did not find for her and chose to raise another babyBig smile  Baby Stealer is kinda weird, but it is probably coming from the fact that she breast fed Pari, it would not be my choice of words though, more like Deceiver Wink

Ovi had Arjun first, and I am  disappointed that you are ignoring your Indian Sanskaars to make your point.  

My dear, no pointing fingers at me or my Indian sanskars, uncalled for and not allowed on the forum but I shall let it pass this one time. 

Arjun did not belong to Ovi because there was no engagement.  Patrikas are exchanged and families enter into a formal agreement of marriage at a "proper" engagement.  Moreover, Arjun hid the fact and did not tell Purvi that he had agreed to go along with Ovi's marriage idea.  

Husband stealer is not right either, just because Ovi is paranoid, Purvi should not be required to take care to avoid Arjun's "sight".  Ovi should be laying down these rules to her husband.  I will agree with the deceiver bit but mother stealer is way off base, doesn't make sense even for Ovi to believe that.  It is not the baby's fault that Savita aaji kept Ovi apart from her Aai and her Aai to eke out her lonely years decided to adopt said baby. 
My dear I was genuinely not pointing fingers at you, that was not my intention.  I was really enjoying the debate. I just don't understand why the breaking of an engagement is dealt with and seen as no big deal based on the reality of Indian traditions. 

Edited by hillydee - 11 April 2013 at 11:25pm

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:27pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by hillydee


It was not an unprovoked barter, it was a final attempt at salvaging the biggest disrespect anyone woman could face.  Yes, it was in turn giving Arjun precedence over her self worth.  However, it was fair under the circumstances when everyone including her Father pushed her feelings aside for the sake of Purvi's happiness, just like they did when Purvi's supposedly died and Ovi's own was supposed to be alive.

Another thing, Purvi's announcement that her baby died, is the lowest anyone could ever go to keep a secret, to claim your baby dead.  She could have offered Pari, after Ovi finished grieving.

I do not think it was salvaging at all, it was stooping low and underselling herself.  If she were in any way related to me, I would have comforted her over her loss (Arjun, I mean) and encouraged her to forget him.  No man is worth belittling oneself like that, period.  She only hurt herself further in the bargain, why open herself to more hurt?  if the guy didn't want her, why want him? Good riddance to bad rubbish. 

Your second paragraph, I agree with completely, it was wrong of Purvi to do the baby switch and to pretend her own baby is dead is weird to say the least.

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:28pm | IP Logged

What is a promise then?  The plans for engagement was  announced from in Canada.  

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:30pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee


It was not an unprovoked barter, it was a final attempt at salvaging the biggest disrespect anyone woman could face.  Yes, it was in turn giving Arjun precedence over her self worth.  However, it was fair under the circumstances when everyone including her Father pushed her feelings aside for the sake of Purvi's happiness, just like they did when Purvi's supposedly died and Ovi's own was supposed to be alive.

Another thing, Purvi's announcement that her baby died, is the lowest anyone could ever go to keep a secret, to claim your baby dead.  She could have offered Pari, after Ovi finished grieving.

I do not think it was salvaging at all, it was stooping low and underselling herself.  If she were in any way related to me, I would have comforted her over her loss (Arjun, I mean) and encouraged her to forget him.  No man is worth belittling oneself like that, period.  She only hurt herself further in the bargain, why open herself to more hurt?  if the guy didn't want her, why want him? Good riddance to bad rubbish. 

Your second paragraph, I agree with completely, it was wrong of Purvi to do the baby switch and to pretend her own baby is dead is weird to say the least.
As I said before Ovi should not have lowered her standards to that level.  However, she is not totally wrong because she had no obligation to anyone, and no one cared what she was going through.  I cannot judge anyone in such a situation.

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Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:32pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by hillydee

Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee

Originally posted by soapwatcher1

Originally posted by hillydee


Just to be technically correct, if you fall in love with a man and find out that he is engaged, and your personal value system does not prod you to leave him alone at all costs, instead you wait patiently for him to slaughter his fiancee, yes the accurate terminology is that you are a man stealer, boyfriend stealer, fiancee stealer, whatever word best suits. 

The fact still remains you are a stealer. Nice girls from nice homes don't do such things.  Also, their Mothers would not encourage such a marriage. 


Ah, you see I was careful, LOLI did not say man stealer, boyfriend stealer, or fiance stealer, I said "husband stealer, gold-digger, mother stealer and baby stealer" and Purvi is none of these.  Wink

Your definition makes Ovi a stealer too, she stole Arjun right back.  At least Arjun was not engaged to Ovi when Purvi and him fell in love with each other and Purvi knew Arjun did not want Ovi. Purvi did stay away from Arjun after the engagement, he declared his love for her to Manav in front of the D, broke off his rishta and relentlessly pursued her in the chawl.  

But Ovi has no such excuse, she knew Arjun was engaged to Purvi, she knew he loved Purvi and yet went right ahead to steal him.  

Good girls don't do that either, mothers don't encourage or approve of putting valued relationships at stake, bartering your dad's happiness (I will refrain from saying mother's happiness in deference to those who have said Archana did not raise Ovi so there was no love lost between them) because you are blinded by your own selfish need to acquire your sister's soon to be husband. 
You can't steal something that was already yours, love or no love they were engaged before he fell in love with PurviWink Husband stealer is not far off either, because Purvi never made herself that unavailable in Arjun's sight..She never practised to mind her own business.Wink Indirectly she is a Mother Stealer, to someone who is hurt that their Mother did not find for her and chose to raise another babyBig smile  Baby Stealer is kinda weird, but it is probably coming from the fact that she breast fed Pari, it would not be my choice of words though, more like Deceiver Wink

Ovi had Arjun first, and I am  disappointed that you are ignoring your Indian Sanskaars to make your point.  

My dear, no pointing fingers at me or my Indian sanskars, uncalled for and not allowed on the forum but I shall let it pass this one time. 

Arjun did not belong to Ovi because there was no engagement.  Patrikas are exchanged and families enter into a formal agreement of marriage at a "proper" engagement.  Moreover, Arjun hid the fact and did not tell Purvi that he had agreed to go along with Ovi's marriage idea.  

Husband stealer is not right either, just because Ovi is paranoid, Purvi should not be required to take care to avoid Arjun's "sight".  Ovi should be laying down these rules to her husband.  I will agree with the deceiver bit but mother stealer is way off base, doesn't make sense even for Ovi to believe that.  It is not the baby's fault that Savita aaji kept Ovi apart from her Aai and her Aai to eke out her lonely years decided to adopt said baby. 
My dear I was genuinely not pointing fingers at you, that was not my intention.  I was really enjoying the debate. I just don't understand why the breaking of an engagement is dealt with and seen as no big deal based on the reality of Indian traditions. 

Because there was "technically" no engagement when Purvi fell in love with Arjun.  The exchanging of rings is not typically binding in itself.  The religious ceremony, the exchanging of patrikas, the setting of a wedding date all those are what constitute an "engagement" per se if we look at it traditionally.  Of course, this is a soap and the CVs, whoever they are, take a lot of liberties with everything. 

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