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The Dating Game (removed) (Page 30)

summaiyasayed IF-Sizzlerz
summaiyasayed
summaiyasayed

Joined: 10 February 2012
Posts: 15449

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 9:36am | IP Logged
Amazing update..thanx for pm

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

arisai

ashred12 IF-Rockerz
ashred12
ashred12

Joined: 26 July 2006
Posts: 7277

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 9:36am | IP Logged
interesting...

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arisai

tachyon Goldie
tachyon
tachyon

Joined: 27 January 2012
Posts: 1736

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 10:07am | IP Logged
wow!! akash is awesome!!!!!
i'm loving it!!!
continue soon... thanks for the PM

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

arisai

apoorvaarnav IF-Dazzler
apoorvaarnav
apoorvaarnav

Joined: 10 April 2012
Posts: 2827

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 10:34am | IP Logged
omg!! too good!! :D
you have an amaing ability to write in any kind of genre!!

arnav with a cat!! !omg!! classic villain look!! wow!! :D
payash were cute!!
arnav is totally a crackpot in this one!!


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arisai

MsIPKKNDManic Senior Member
MsIPKKNDManic
MsIPKKNDManic

Joined: 20 March 2012
Posts: 612

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 10:40am | IP Logged
GAHH PayAsh gushiness overload right there! It reminds me so much of Jane & Bing from TLBD Day Dreaming

I like that you're showing a little bit of everything from everyone's POV - we've had ASR, Khushi, Akaash and now this one was Payal's - you're not sidelining any character and you're giving them all an almost equal standing within the story, if that makes sense? 

Oh! So ASR has a cat too?! First cackling, and now a ca- oh, sorry, a FamiliarROFL

I'm honestly surprised that after turning on his chair and stroking the cat's fur, he didn't say something like "I've been expecting you"! LOL

And I like seeing this Akash as being the kind of person who isn't afraid to stick up to his unpredictable elder brother; as seen in the way he was retorting brilliantly to everything ASR said. 

OOOH! Khushi's pretty much just cannonballed into the room and she's not happy at all seeing him there, is she?! ROFL

Ahh this encounter looks like it's going to be ... feisty

Also, I really don't want to seem like a nitpicker, but when you're describing the kind of clothes that they design, you say "as inspired by the long coat-like thing" 

I've read quite a bit of your previous works to know that you usually go into a lot of details with things, and that everything is described so intricately and with wonderful finesse. Seeing that single line, I was a tad thrown off, because it wasn't something I'd expect to see from a wonderful writer like yourself, if you get me? Maybe I'm merely over-thinking (which wouldn't be anything new, tbh LOL ) ... Please don't take me wrong though; I've absolutely loved everything else, it's just that I noticed and so I thought I should tell you Smile

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

arisai

arisai Goldie
arisai
arisai

Joined: 17 February 2012
Posts: 2327

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 10:52am | IP Logged
Originally posted by MsIPKKNDManic

GAHH PayAsh gushiness overload right there! It reminds me so much of Jane & Bing from TLBD Day Dreaming

I like that you're showing a little bit of everything from everyone's POV - we've had ASR, Khushi, Akaash and now this one was Payal's - you're not sidelining any character and you're giving them all an almost equal standing within the story, if that makes sense? 

Oh! So ASR has a cat too?! First cackling, and now a ca- oh, sorry, a FamiliarROFL

I'm honestly surprised that after turning on his chair and stroking the cat's fur, he didn't say something like "I've been expecting you"! LOL

And I like seeing this Akash as being the kind of person who isn't afraid to stick up to his unpredictable elder brother; as seen in the way he was retorting brilliantly to everything ASR said. 

OOOH! Khushi's pretty much just cannonballed into the room and she's not happy at all seeing him there, is she?! ROFL

Ahh this encounter looks like it's going to be ... feisty

Also, I really don't want to seem like a nitpicker, but when you're describing the kind of clothes that they design, you say "as inspired by the long coat-like thing" 

I've read quite a bit of your previous works to know that you usually go into a lot of details with things, and that everything is described so intricately and with wonderful finesse. Seeing that single line, I was a tad thrown off, because it wasn't something I'd expect to see from a wonderful writer like yourself, if you get me? Maybe I'm merely over-thinking (which wouldn't be anything new, tbh LOL ) ... Please don't take me wrong though; I've absolutely loved everything else, it's just that I noticed and so I thought I should tell you Smile

Oooh, the 'long-coatlike thing' was Khushi's 'voice' if you get what I mean (I know you do you little genius, you already noticed everyone's getting their say). I wanted to try and show that Khushi herself has absolutely no idea about anything fashion related and just has blind faith in and loyalty to Payal's abilities so may be er... somewhat biased in her "OMG EVERYTHING SHE MAKES IS FANTASTIC AND BRILLIANT OMG!" LOL


I've already written the next chapter and Khushi's 'bias' as well as her lack of knowledge on the matter becomes obvious when her and Arnav start with their verbal war and Payal is caught in the middle of it- as are her designs. Hehehe, I love that you love that I pay attention to details- and this was one such detail :) 

Thanks for the long spiel of love and also for being honest about what didn't sit right as well. I'd rather explain it than leave you thinking "What? BUT WHY?!" Wink

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

MsIPKKNDManic

MsIPKKNDManic Senior Member
MsIPKKNDManic
MsIPKKNDManic

Joined: 20 March 2012
Posts: 612

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:19am | IP Logged
Originally posted by arisai

Originally posted by MsIPKKNDManic

GAHH PayAsh gushiness overload right there! It reminds me so much of Jane & Bing from TLBD Day Dreaming

I like that you're showing a little bit of everything from everyone's POV - we've had ASR, Khushi, Akaash and now this one was Payal's - you're not sidelining any character and you're giving them all an almost equal standing within the story, if that makes sense? 

Oh! So ASR has a cat too?! First cackling, and now a ca- oh, sorry, a FamiliarROFL

I'm honestly surprised that after turning on his chair and stroking the cat's fur, he didn't say something like "I've been expecting you"! LOL

And I like seeing this Akash as being the kind of person who isn't afraid to stick up to his unpredictable elder brother; as seen in the way he was retorting brilliantly to everything ASR said. 

OOOH! Khushi's pretty much just cannonballed into the room and she's not happy at all seeing him there, is she?! ROFL

Ahh this encounter looks like it's going to be ... feisty

Also, I really don't want to seem like a nitpicker, but when you're describing the kind of clothes that they design, you say "as inspired by the long coat-like thing" 

I've read quite a bit of your previous works to know that you usually go into a lot of details with things, and that everything is described so intricately and with wonderful finesse. Seeing that single line, I was a tad thrown off, because it wasn't something I'd expect to see from a wonderful writer like yourself, if you get me? Maybe I'm merely over-thinking (which wouldn't be anything new, tbh LOL ) ... Please don't take me wrong though; I've absolutely loved everything else, it's just that I noticed and so I thought I should tell you Smile

Oooh, the 'long-coatlike thing' was Khushi's 'voice' if you get what I mean (I know you do you little genius, you already noticed everyone's getting their say). I wanted to try and show that Khushi herself has absolutely no idea about anything fashion related and just has blind faith in and loyalty to Payal's abilities so may be er... somewhat biased in her "OMG EVERYTHING SHE MAKES IS FANTASTIC AND BRILLIANT OMG!" LOL


I've already written the next chapter and Khushi's 'bias' as well as her lack of knowledge on the matter becomes obvious when her and Arnav start with their verbal war and Payal is caught in the middle of it- as are her designs. Hehehe, I love that you love that I pay attention to details- and this was one such detail :) 

Thanks for the long spiel of love and also for being honest about what didn't sit right as well. I'd rather explain it than leave you thinking "What? BUT WHY?!" Wink

a-ha! I had a fleeting thought that that was in fact why it was there, but I still mentioned it, just in case LOL 

MEEEP update quick then! I BHANTS TO SEE(READ) THIS VERBAL WAR Big smile

haha all your compliments are like ghee to the fire that is my insatiable ego - mesa likeyyy WinkROFL

And it's really not a problemo - you deserve it, therefore I say it Smile 

And thank you muchacho for explaining it to mehh ^_^ 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

arisai

crazymg.04 Goldie
crazymg.04
crazymg.04

Joined: 14 March 2012
Posts: 999

Posted: 11 April 2013 at 11:40am | IP Logged
LOLOMG...hillariousBig smile
Cant wait to know what happens nextWink

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

arisai

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