Diya Aur Baati Hum

India-Forums

   
Diya Aur Baati Hum
Diya Aur Baati Hum

Knowing Where We Are Going

..Anusha.. IF-Sizzlerz
..Anusha..
..Anusha..

Joined: 02 September 2009
Posts: 17056

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 7:13pm | IP Logged

A slightly philosophical look at SurYa.


The greatest thing for a human, imo, is, to know their purpose. To have an identity. To be secure in that knowledge. To have a goal, a joy set before us. (I'll add here that for me, all of the above is given me by my faith in God). Some of us are blessed at an early stage in our journey and know our mission in life. Others may take a bit longer to mature and find their calling. Still others are denied the freedom and opportunities to discover this truth, but all of us, all of us have a calling on our lives.But here I'm trying to deal with SurYa...and is that even possible, when I sometimes struggle to know them as individuals?  Do I look at them individually or as a couple. Are they one or two? They insist they are two in one - Diya Aur Baati Hum. 

Am I right in assuming that this means one has the vision and the goal, the other is the enabler? Does this look noble? Does it look pretty? I suspect, it didn't to the CVs last year. So they flipped it and made the Baati become a Diya. Sandy decided to find a goal for Suraj and insisted on being his enabler,encourager,friend,philosopher and guide. And so we had the WTC competition. But frankly, I found it hard to swallow. Suraj did too. Why? Because nothing had fundamentally changed. It was Sandy being switched on by the idea of a competition and pushing Suraj almost all the way till he won it. Who got the most satisfaction from that? Who was fulfilled? Hard to say. I doubt either Diya or Baati really got much out of that other than a temporary buzz. Diya didn't need that to know that he is happiest when he's being himself. Baati didn't need Diya to win that trophy to know that she can inspire people to be the best they can be. Maybe the  lesson here is, find out what the person really wants, before trying to inspire them. (lol)

There is such a thing as wisdom. It comes with experience, it comes with maturity. There is a thing called love. That also comes with time. I'm not talking about the instant variety. Sandy is very young. Suraj is young. But he has the benefit of longer years of struggle. He has learned things that are difficult for him to communicate in words. This doesn't mean Sandy has not learned. She had a very protracted and painful introduction to adult life. She will not forget those scars in a hurry, although she has forgiven. Those are scars she can wear with dignity. Indeed it is that dignity that makes Bhabo both love and hate her. Some new woman was forged in those fires. ( I am not condoning such ill treatment of a human at all, but in this story, Sandy has triumphed). She had the option of leaving, was told to leave, left, but came back. She came back for her Diya. When she returned, Bhabo was more grateful than she will ever admit.  Suraj fell in love with Sandy more completely. Pretty much a gone case! 

But there's a fire. A vision in the far distance. The things that fuel Sandy. It's what this story is supposed to be about. Her career. So Suraj has made that a non-negotiable thing. She wanted to drop it but he is willing to sacrifice for it. IPS will definitely mean he will have to live without her for long periods. But he will be happy knowing he had a big part to play in making her stay the course. He will be fulfilled. Will Sandy be fulfilled? Or will she suddenly discover another path? 

There is nothing wrong with love triumphing over career. If we choose to give up something, if we are prepared to let it die, if we don't want to be torn between choices, then choose to give it up. It is a risk. But love is all about risk. Risk of rejection, risk of misunderstanding, risk of resentment, risk of guilt, risk of fear from the person we choose to love. Love is unconditional or it isn't love. Somehow, I think Sandy is also capable of this love. Am I in romance overdrive? Hope not. Because this is also a marriage. It's not a walk in the park. It's a commitment. It's more than mushy feelings. It's a life-long bond. Will Sandy want this more than that? 

Maybe dabh will show this tussle for a while. I cannot say what I'll prefer to see. I'm equally torn. 









 


The following 12 member(s) liked the above post:

walquest2000LovePraja-SamiR-slodkagilaDeebzfarhana874vish.narenUMDUSAIBALROUTH.NJ.-Liebe-thala

UMDU IF-Dazzler
UMDU
UMDU

Joined: 31 August 2012
Posts: 3170

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 7:51pm | IP Logged
Oh my God, didn't see this thread. Wrote mine last night and posted it today. Well well great minds think alike, I suppose. Maybe subah subah let us give each other a pat on the back. Now on a serious note from my perspective, marriage to me is living with your partner. I some how am no fan of long distance relationships. Of course each to his own. In the story there is no way they can show Sandhya staying with Suraj after she passes the IPS. She will be posted every 3 to 5 yrs to different districts and sometimes remote ones. It will be economically unviable for him to establish a business in all those corners. I doubt from the society where he comes from the idea of house husband will be acceptable. Weekend trips are difficult as Rajasthan is a big state and she need not be posted near Pushkar. Sandhya now has to decide whether the pursuit of her dreams is more important or being with Suraj and having a normal family life with children coming in subsequently more important. Whether an alternative career of being an MLA or MP will satisfy her zeal for social work. Suraj has made a decision to let her go or maybe he is unaware of the separation aspect and his love for his wife colours his judgement...

The following 9 member(s) liked the above post:

walquest2000-SamiR-slodkagilafarhana874SAIBALROUTH.NJ...Anusha..-Liebe-thala

slodkagila IF-Dazzler
slodkagila
slodkagila

Joined: 16 March 2013
Posts: 4247

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 8:55pm | IP Logged
A bit of information i would like to add here about IPS course
If you are interested in reading the whole part then click the link below.

http://targetstudy.com/professions/ips-officer.html

According to the above Surya have lots of time to achieve their goal.
As far as the separation is concerned it can be avoided if sandy tops her state in IPS exams.

"Being all India Services,IPS officers are posted to various state cadre under cadre system. The cadre system is allotted on the basis of lottery and the top rank holder of each state may get a chance to get their home state if he had applied for one."

According to the above link they say that the prelim, final exams & interview will take abt 1 year & training part will take one yr. So it will be 2 yrs altogether to become an IPS.

And another thing is IPS officers' job description is wide. It includes VIP security, border policing, tackling corruption, railway police, counter terrorism, checking  smuggling, drug trafficking, cyber crime, disaster mgmt, they can also be the leading officers of inetelligence agencies like RAW, or BSF , etc.

So I guess this serial has taken a very good challenge on their shoulder.

After reading the above link i'm confident that Surya can manage both the normal relationship & career quite comfortably. Even if there is transfers no probs. There are many in the country who manage their transfers.

If sandy tops the state she will get a chance to serve her state. This is surely on the cards.

On searching in google i saw many ips woman officers from their state serving their own state.

SO SANDY PURSUING HER CAREER  & A NORMAL RELATIONSHIP WITH SURAJ IS NOT A BIG DEAL. QUITE ACHIEVABLE. THE THING REQUIRED IS MENTAL STABILITY, MORAL SUPPORT & A CLEAR VISION.Wink

Another point was raised abt children suffering without one parent?
The answer is very simple. Surya live in a joint family. The children can be very well be taken care of by the family members all the time. It is very unrealistic that police officers don get time to spend with their children. There are so many police officers in India leading a happy & well balanced family.

Where there is a will there is a way. I have a strong belief in this.Tongue

posted this in umdu ji thread also.


Edited by shbhn3 - 06 April 2013 at 9:01pm

The following 7 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-farhana874.NJ...Anusha..-Liebe-SAIBALROUTHthala

..Anusha.. IF-Sizzlerz
..Anusha..
..Anusha..

Joined: 02 September 2009
Posts: 17056

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 9:36pm | IP Logged
Uma,  I 'll zero in on your last sentence : Suraj has made a decision to let her go or maybe he is unaware of the separation aspect and his love for his wife colours his judgement...

I like this idea that Suraj has made a decision. I also like that you have posited his love for his wife colouring his judgement. Both are equally wonderful propositions from the grand story telling perspective. It opens up big possibilities in exploring their relationship rather than avoiding it and making Sandy seem like a pre-programmed robot who has 'IPS' hard wired into her.


Shobhana ji,  I don't think I can agree with the idea that everything will be fine, no probs. In a show, yes. But even in a show, they've made Sandy go through horrendous tortures. So no. In real life?  Career and normal relationship is not a big deal? 


Edited by PadBear - 06 April 2013 at 9:36pm

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-farhana874.NJ.-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH

slodkagila IF-Dazzler
slodkagila
slodkagila

Joined: 16 March 2013
Posts: 4247

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 9:54pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by PadBear

Shobhana ji,  I don't think I can agree with the idea that everything will be fine, no probs. In a show, yes. But even in a show, they've made Sandy go through horrendous tortures. So no. In real life?  Career and normal relationship is not a big deal? 


Anusha aunty u can call me shobhana. No ji required.

It will be biased to say that persons pursuing a career doesn't have normal relationship. There are so many persons (women) whom i have met personally having a career on their own & leading a normal relationship. There are few IPS officers too (can search it in google).
And one more point. People not having a career that doesn't mean that all is well in their relationship. Each relationship has its own probs.

So acc to me pursuing one's own career is quite achievable with the support of the family & friends.

And yes there is a price for everything in the world not only for pursuing career.

I hope u understand my views.Smile

The following 6 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-farhana874.NJ...Anusha..-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH

..Anusha.. IF-Sizzlerz
..Anusha..
..Anusha..

Joined: 02 September 2009
Posts: 17056

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 9:58pm | IP Logged
Shobhanaji ( i like honouring young ones LOL ) all relationships have problems. It requires work and lots of it just to stay together. I suggest that CVs show SurYa having realistics problems and even a huge row. It can even be Sandy's next major challenge. 

The following 6 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-slodkagilafarhana874.NJ.-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH

farhana874 IF-Dazzler
farhana874
farhana874

Joined: 08 April 2012
Posts: 4171

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 11:19pm | IP Logged
''He will be fulfilled. Will Sandy be fulfilled? Or will she suddenly discover another path? ''

I think this will be the time when Sandy will be a complete gone case!
Deewani ho jayegi! She is in love with Sooraj but only then she will realize how madly she is in love, then she will realize what Sooraj has done/sacrificed for her.Day Dreaming
Kahin Sandy training se bhagke na chali aye!LOL

Lovely post Paddy!

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-.NJ...Anusha..-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH

-SamiR- Goldie
-SamiR-
-SamiR-

Joined: 12 October 2012
Posts: 1406

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 12:08am | IP Logged
Interesting post Anusha ji!

I like the idea of 'love triumphing over career'. Wouldn't that be some ending?! The whole time we're thinking (well .. at least I am) that this isn't really a love story in the traditional sense .. but with an ending like that, it wouldn't be anything but a love story!

I just can't picture the CVs doing this though. I mean abandoning the obvious outcome of Sandhya being IPS is way too risky. Not to mention the CVs would have to give up on their ultimate social message of a wife successfully pursuing her dream (with her husband's support).

Technically speaking .. Sandhya did decide at one point to give up her dream; but I think that was more due to her love for Bhabho than for Suraj Ermm

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

UMDU.NJ...Anusha..-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Author Replies Views Last Post
I Know what Is Going To Happen!*Fun Post*

2

Author: I-Luv-Rashi   Replies: 11   Views: 4155

I-Luv-Rashi 11 4155 16 March 2013 at 7:13pm by Surish
*** Good going Sandy ***

2 3 4

Author: SAIBALROUTH   Replies: 27   Views: 3463

SAIBALROUTH 27 3463 01 February 2013 at 8:12am by Diya_DB
DABH going on beendh banoonga footsteps

Author: arti12345   Replies: 6   Views: 963

arti12345 6 963 21 January 2013 at 4:19am by arti12345
Sandy going going gawn

2 3 4 5 6 7

Author: ..Anusha..   Replies: 54   Views: 5422

..Anusha.. 54 5422 29 May 2012 at 7:36am by Brahmaputra
Sandhya is Going Going Gone

2

Author: Avidfan   Replies: 13   Views: 2690

Avidfan 13 2690 30 March 2012 at 5:04am by Avidfan

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category / Channels
Forums

  • Please login to check your Last 10 Topics posted

Check these Celebrity also

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.

Popular Channels :
Star Plus | Zee TV | Sony TV | Colors TV | SAB TV | Life OK

Quick Links :
Top 100 TV Celebrities | Top 100 Bollywood Celebs | About Us | Contact Us | Advertise | Forum Index