See , it is like this .
I see this show not for pairings but as a story of 2 social systems and the way they r comprehended by each other .
If Gayatri can point out the fallacies of an Indian system , Ansu ba has her own pre conceived notions about America , which she calls' videsh' .
Often it is not the young who r unwilling to adjust in a marraige . Many a time , the young r more malleable and willing to change . Its the elders who r hardened , egoistic and unwilling to change and viciously see to it that the innocent youngsters don't get any happiness .
But the young couple is blamed for the elders do vicious plottings and then quickly take refuge in their grey hairs . They then say in fake hurt tones ...Look Parul , ur son is talking back to me , this and that .
Such elders r not fit to be called elders and r villains . Even more than Hasu , Ansu ba is a villain . I have seen thousands of such Ansu bas who have wrecked their bahu's life while clicking their rosary beads . Many indian ladies who watch this show will identify with this story as their story . The scenario is the same , troubling the bahu under the name of discipline , helpless and confused husband , ineffective sasur and one member of the family who is nice and rational but weak . Here it is Parul . There is only so much Parul can do , she is suppressed herself .
I thought it was an atrocious show . But i realized that what is being shown is purposefully being shown , sympathy will go to the girl against whom all r prejudiced and unwilling to give a chance not to Ansu Ba who talks of sanskaars all the time ...this goes for every indian viewer watching the show .
Maybe the creatives want to tell the masses in their crude , commercial way that all American girls r not that bad and it is best not to pre judge . Hence the portrayal of Bhumi .
Now for the 'despo' tag .
I would not say that each girl based in the US voices herself freely , unafraid and that all girls in India r quiet and don't voice their opinions . Depends on the individuals , whichever nationality you are . Have seen many shy , stammering girls in the US with inferiority complexes , unwilling to speak up or open up even with therapists . They r like Bharti , they keep their personal feelings bottled up . Many girls in India r like Avni , very vocal about their dislikes . It all depends on the individual .
I did not see Bhumi having multiple boyfriends , going to discos , flirting , having free sex ...nothing .
I only saw her doing a job seriously . Jai was the first boy she fell for and she has innocently given him her hundred percent . Because she loved him , she worried for him , made his problem her own and showed him a way to achieve his goal by getting a wok permit by marrying her .
Jai ,on his part ,was attracted to her , but knew he had responsibilities . He too married her for the work permit .
But though both married each other for the work permit it turned out to be a very happy deal as they both liked each other . Both did not even think of getting out of the marraige once work permit was got . Bhumi did not use the work permit to fasten on to the boy , she was genuinely worried for him . He did not decide to drop Bhumi after he got the work permit , he regarded her as his wife .
If Bhumi was a despo , she would not have agreed so understandingly when Jai told her that consummation or a real marraige would be possible only after Ansu ba gives her blessing after the exams .
Most girls would take offense . Their feminine ego would be hurt if the husband made such a decision . But Bhumi went along egolessly .
No , i would not categorize her as a despo. She fell in love , did not know how to go about it and was given absolutely wrong guidance by Nans who had her own racist agenda ...she wanted naatin to marry an Indian guy and go to India .
I agree with u totally about Nans . In all my posts i have blasted her. I can go on and on about where she went wrong .
I find her as racist and as conniving as Ansu ba .
Both old ladies make horribly racist comments . The latest was from Ansu Ba . Those videshi people eat in plastic cups so their relationships r also like plastic , breakable .
They eat in disposable plastic as labour is not available here . Kaam waali bais r not available here to wash bartans like India . And most marraiges in India don't break not coz the sanskaars r super dazzling but because the spouses have no option like Parul whose spousal relationship is anything but perfect .
Now for Bharti . I don't want to see a love triangle for Bharti . I want CVs to give her dignity and self respect . I can understand her being unhappy and quiet right now but if she sees a glimmer of hope still that Jai's marraige will not take off and she will be wedded to Jai one day , i will criticize that . Her Nana shet is married and hankering after a married guy as if she will never get any other proposals will perhaps come across as 'despo' in the future and i do not want CVs to take that route . As Ash said i will even crticize Jai if he leaves Bhumi to fulfil Ansu ba's vachan . If he makes convenient excuses in his thinking that anyways we married for work permit and anyways the marraige is not consummated ...i won't like it .
Even if Bhumi does this 'tyaag' i won't like it as marraige is no joke , if the couple like each other and r confident of jelling , absolutely no reason to break it up , coz only that counts .