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Story: Faraar Mujhrim aur Abhi-Daya (2ND POST) (Page 3)

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mano86

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mano86

Joined: 04 September 2012

Posts: 5339

Posted: 06 April 2013 at 2:17pm | IP Logged
ll try to read the story by tomorrow Smile

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suhani.cipamisa

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suhani.cipamisa

IF-Rockerz

suhani.cipamisa

Joined: 12 April 2009

Posts: 7913

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 1:09am | IP Logged
pushing up

suhani.cipamisa

IF-Rockerz

suhani.cipamisa

Joined: 12 April 2009

Posts: 7913

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 3:38am | IP Logged
.

suhani.cipamisa

IF-Rockerz

suhani.cipamisa

Joined: 12 April 2009

Posts: 7913

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 3:39am | IP Logged
... y is no one reading????!!!!! no comments no feedbacks!!!??? today is sunday...

debasree04

IF-Sizzlerz

debasree04

Sport/Cricket & Yudh Banner Contest Winner

Joined: 13 August 2010

Posts: 16315

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 3:53am | IP Logged
Nice story...i like the plot to save the girl...Thumbs Up
hope FW thinks some day about such plots...

just one point - i dnt think ACP sir can react like this way...
Acp (Irritated)- Uff ullu ke patthe, aur kya nahi samjha.




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suhani.cipamisa

..optimist..

IF-Rockerz

..optimist..

Joined: 02 November 2012

Posts: 9304

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 4:35am | IP Logged
Will read soon...Smile

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suhani.cipamisa

chand_hp

Senior Member

chand_hp

Joined: 30 January 2013

Posts: 701

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 4:39am | IP Logged
Like the story...but y didnt you include rajat???


Edited by chand_hp - 07 April 2013 at 4:39am

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suhani.cipamisa

visrom

IF-Veteran Member

visrom

Joined: 26 November 2009

Posts: 27958

Posted: 07 April 2013 at 6:19am | IP Logged
Chalo, read it now.

The plot is good and you have been inspired by the recent news of kidnap offoreign tourists etc...as Deba said...it'll be nice if FW thought of such ideas. But they are taking it more towards a kids show. Ouch

Now a few things...why would Sachin ogle at 2 girls??? Come on...that's a wrong thing you made a CID officer do...ok Sachin or Vin or Nik may not be smart and sharp as duo but they are nice to women...Wink ACP will not use swear words while reprimanding his juniors...that's another point...


Then you have your Suhaani...from the time we got this battalion, any extra members only seem like 'too many cooks'... but you wanted to take the story to Delhi so it's ok. She addresssed Abhijeet as'mama'...ROFL seemed odd.


Other than these, rest of the story was good. Nice to see the team celebrating Abhijeet's bday. Something they have never shown...they showed Vineet's bday recently...but never duo's in these 16 years. Disapprove

I was imagining it happen...Big smile


Waiting for more...if possible only with existing characters next time...Tongue

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suhani.cipamisa

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