Qubool Hai

   

'A Dare!'---- An AsYa OS. (Page 2)

Post Reply New Post

Page 2 of 13

Page 1
Page   of 13
Page 3 Page 13

Nurshad.kajen

IF-Dazzler

Nurshad.kajen

Joined: 21 April 2012

Posts: 3921

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:44am | IP Logged
Sk nice os..loved it..

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_anishaalluri

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "'A Dare!'---- An AsYa OS. (Page 2)" in Qubool Hai forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

MisHumptyDumpty

IF-Sizzlerz

MisHumptyDumpty

Joined: 31 July 2012

Posts: 21985

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:51am | IP Logged
This was just Ahhmazzing!

If i amnt mistaken, You must be THE FAMOUS Khan Sadaf of FB who writes Ahhmazing FFs on DMG! Embarrassed

My little Sister Heena is a crazied fan of yours! Hug its soo great to know you Hug 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_

Fimmy

IF-Dazzler

Fimmy

Joined: 30 April 2010

Posts: 4302

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:52am | IP Logged
Loved it...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_

KaJen_Ki_Mamta

Senior Member

KaJen_Ki_Mamta

Joined: 10 September 2012

Posts: 305

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:55am | IP Logged
PROUD OF UR WRITING SK..
Clap

hayye AsYa kiss Embarrassed
mwahh

Lots Of Love
ur Mamly

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_

nihamrm

Goldie

nihamrm

Joined: 02 January 2012

Posts: 1683

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:55am | IP Logged
wow that was so cute!!!
love tamatar 
And lol the sher in the end was it yours?? then it just cracked me up 
just love this  os 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_

Laila2009

IF-Rockerz

Laila2009

Joined: 27 October 2009

Posts: 7412

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:57am | IP Logged
Excellent first attempt. Totally well done! You have beautiful comic timing in this OS. It's hard to believe this is your first one. Here are some of the strengths in this OS:

Grammar, descriptive writing, sentence structure - all of these were bang on and made the whole story easy to read and follow...

No unnecessary background information; again made it fast, great to read, and not a drag.

Wonderful friendship shown between Najma and Zoya. That she shared her feelings with Najma who embraced her - all added an endearing and touching quality to the comedy. 

Asad and Zoya's conversation and his comment "this is not a dare" were sweet. I would have had him actually kiss her on the lips and then say something to her beyond the peck on the cheek...she might have got it but his silence and is not saying anything beyond getting her a pizza left me a bit unsatisfied as a reader; I wanted a passionate kiss with - and this is not a dare...and then a wink...and then Zoya's reaction that he indeed felt for her.  

The sharyai was a wonderful closing element. 

Overall, this is one of the better OS I have read; you should write more...and you can even do a second part to this one...where Zoya and Asad decide to pull a prank on Najma for having dared herWink

The following 4 member(s) liked the above post:

_Sadaf_KaJen_Ki_MamtaanishaalluriRushitaa

_Sadaf_

Senior Member

_Sadaf_

Joined: 15 May 2012

Posts: 637

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 9:58am | IP Logged
Originally posted by MisHumptyDumpty

This was just Ahhmazzing!

If i amnt mistaken, You must be THE FAMOUS Khan Sadaf of FB who writes Ahhmazing FFs on DMG! Embarrassed

My little Sister Heena is a crazied fan of yours! Hug its soo great to know you Hug 

Damn!! I wasn't expecting your comment!! LOL
Yes I'm the same Khan Sadaf. Itni taareef? Wink
Well, your sis is my fan and I am a huge fan of your gutter OS's and your amazing memes!! Big smile
You're Ankita Chatterjee on fb, right?? 

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

KaJen_Ki_MamtaMisHumptyDumpty

_Sadaf_

Senior Member

_Sadaf_

Joined: 15 May 2012

Posts: 637

Posted: 31 March 2013 at 10:00am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nihamrm

wow that was so cute!!!
love tamatar 
And lol the sher in the end was it yours?? then it just cracked me up 
just love this  os 


Thanks a lot...
And yes that lame shayari was mine LOL

Post Reply New Post

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Topic Starter Replies Views Last Post
Lets Re-Discuss AsYa Dance-Asad 6 Packs-Team AsYa

2 3 4 5 6

-RohitMaxwell- 40 8641 11 May 2014 at 9:38pm
By Nandiniraizaada
asya's luvstory abt to begin(asya thoughts)

2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

flowergarden 74 21454 22 February 2014 at 1:33am
By _Surbhi_Star_
Asya FF:Will you marry me?chp 3 pg 9 completed

2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 13 14

janhavi1916 104 26295 01 September 2013 at 11:30pm
By -whitepearl-
HOW DARE YOU ?????? -RohitMaxwell- 8 693 03 February 2013 at 11:34am
By Sunshine Girl
AsYa AT.1 ~*AsYa Pyar Qubool Hai*~ TazLuvArShiAsYa 5 4662 21 January 2013 at 2:55pm
By |Persephone|

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Qubool Hai Topic Index

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.