G.I Joe: Retaliation
Bang Bang! Boom Boom!
Slash Slash! Cut Cut!
Cling Clink! Kaboom Kaboom!
Hokay, so basically we've got China, France, India, Isreal, Pakistan,
Russia, the U.K. and Us...with nukes...(We've got about 2600 more than
anybody else, whatever).
Henyway, one day, Cobra decides, all sonsofabitches are going
down. So we launch a nuke at everyone . While it's on it's way, everyone's
like, "Shit shit! Who the f**k is shooting us?" "Oh well! Fire
missiles!"
Then France is like, "Shit guys...we got ze missiles zey are coming!
Fire our shit!" "But I'm le tired"..."Well, have a nap-zen fire ze
missiles!!!"
Meanwhile, Australia is down there like, "W*F, mates?" India, Isreal and
Pakistan launch their shit, so now we've got missiles flying
everywhere, passing each other. Russia's like, "AAAHHH!! Motherland!"
Then England's like, "'Bout that time, eh, chaps?"..."Righto"...
So now the Cobra is like, "f**k, you're dumbasses". Everyone's like, "What's
going on, eh?" Australia's still like, "W*F?" Mars is laughing at us .
And some huge meteor is like, "Well f**k that"
Cobra: Abort. Retry. Fail.
Everyone: Abort. Retry. Fail.
London Bridge is falling down. Falling Down. Falling Down. London Bridge is Falling Down!
Everyone: Someone setup us the bomb
Cobra: All Your base are belong to us. Ha Ha Ha!
Cobra: You have no chance to survive make your time.
Bang Bang! Boom Boom!
Slash Slash! Cut Cut!
Cling Clink! Kaboom Kaboom!
Ze End!
Basically that sums it up in a nice nutshell. But what gives eh. I love the movie. It takes me back to when I was a kid playing with my action figures pretending to blow shit up. Blowing shit up is such f**king cool entertainment. So much fun to see on big screen. And Storm Shadow is hot! I rate it highly only for nostalgia value, adrenaline rush, girls with guns and Storm Shadow's abs.
7/10
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