mad jokes updated part 14 page 55 - Page 32

Teacher: What is the colour of
water?
Honey Singh: Blue hai PANI PANI
PANI PANI PANI PANI
*Slaps*

------------------

A Doctor opened a clinic & wrote
outside the clinic:
Any treatment in Rs.300/- & if we cant
treat, we will pay you back Rs.1000/-.
A CLEVER Man comes to do fraud &
thinking to get Rs.1000.
He says to the Doctor:
I cant feel any taste on my tongue...
Doctor asks the Nurse to put few
drops of medicine from box no 22.
After that the MAN shouts: "What d __
___ ...its URINE!!
The doctor says congratulations your
sense of taste is back now.
The MAN was angry as he lost Rs.300.
After 2 weeks MAN comes back again
& this time he thinks to get back his
previous 300 too.
MAN: Doc! I've lost my memory.
Doctor: Nurse! pls put some drops of
medicine from Box no 22 on his
tongue.
MAN : Wait doctor but that medicine
is for sense of taste.
Doctor: Congratulations your
memory is back.
Moral: Don't try to be over-smart
with Doctors...

--------------

If someone says:
you're not loOking g0od..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
just say -
Excuse me!
I'm not your mirror

---------

If swimming is a good exercise to
stay FIT,
Why are whales FAT ??
Why is the place in a stadium
where people SIT,
called a STAND ?
Why is that everyone wants to go
to HEAVEN,
but nobody wants to DIE..
Shall I say that there is racial
discrimination even in chess...
As the WHITE piece is moved
FIRST...

===========

This is how a Professor explained
Marketing Concepts to a class:
1. You see a Gorgeous Girl at a
party. You go up to her and say:
"I am very rich. Marry me!"
- That's Direct Marketing.
2. You are at a party with a bunch
of friends and see a Gorgeous
Girl. One of your friends goes up
to her and pointing at you says:
"He's very rich.Marry him!"
- That's Advertising.
3. You are at a party and see a
Gorgeous Girl. She walks up to
you and says: "You are very rich!
Can I marry you?"
- That's Brand Recognition.
4. You see a Gorgeous Girl at a
party. You go upto her and say: "I
am very rich. Marry me!" She
gives you a nice hard slap on
your face.
- That's Customer Feedback.
5. You see a Gorgeous Girl at a
party. You go upto her and say: "I
am very rich. Marry me!" And she
introduces you to her husband.
- That's Demand and Supply Gap.
6. You see a Gorgeous Girl at a
party. You go upto her and before
you say: "I m rich, Marry me!",
your wife arrives.
- That's Restriction for Entering
New Markets.
I hope Concepts are clear...
Class is adjourned.

-------

I met a firangi and he asked me
the literal meaning of this song -
"Balam pichkaari jo tune mujhe
maari
Toh seedhi-saadhi chhori
sharaabi ho gayi
Jeans pehenke jo tu ne maara
thumka
Toh lattu padosan ki bhaabi ho
gayi"
I sheepishly had to say the
following -
Dear beloved person, when you
assaulted me with a stream of
water from a liquid projectile
launcher, an ostensibly normal
and balanced female became
alcoholic When you wore denim
and oscillated your pelvic girdle
in one direction, the adjoining
resident's sister-in-law began
showing symptoms of an
obsession-driven psychological
disorder !
Firangi fainted!

If someone says:
you're not loOking g0od..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
just say -
Excuse me!
I'm not your mirror

i like ths