Qubool Hai

   

Discuss about THE SLAP Here! NO New Topics! (Page 45)

Post Reply New Post

Page 45 of 56

Laila2009

IF-Rockerz

Laila2009

Joined: 27 October 2009

Posts: 7412

Posted: 07 February 2013 at 2:10am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Accio_kajen

Read the thoughts in pink and underline!

Originally posted by Laila2009

Originally posted by Accio_kajen

Originally posted by Laila2009

Originally posted by Accio_kajen

I am copy-pasting my post from the thread that I had opened...
All the people who are making the issue of the slap,I would tell you that in the end,it is a show.I am not justifying the slap,but do people understand that the show has a story line where ASAD AHMED KHAN is a male chauvinist?They are trying to show that he is like that.He has been brought up in that conditions.People tend to become impulsive in their lowest emotional movements and the "slap" was a reflexive action.The slap was to a woman,that is why it is being made a big issue!No this can not be termed as domestic violence because domestic violence is constant abusing of a person of ANY gender.Many others shows have showed domestic violence but this is being made an issue because it is by the main lead.

Laila: I go into the worst parts of town and have listened to some horrific stories of abuse and just because someone has had some issues in life does not give them an excuse or a carte blanche to slap people.  Slapping does not constitute a relfex action - it can be controlled. 

Did you do something about it then??Have you helped them?Constantly speaking about how the show is promoting "domestic violence" isn't helping people. I agree that his issues in life does not give him an excuse but the show is showing the reality.Slapping can be controlled but it can also constitute a reflex action.People when in their lowest emotional states tend to become defensiveThis happens with both men and women.I am not saying it is justified,just answering your question.

Laila: Yes I have. Can you say with evidence that it will not make any difference. Slapping is not a reflex action - please look at biology 101. 

Can you say with evidence that it is affecting people?If yes,then I am wrong and  I'll leave it at that.And the reflex action point is seen from this example-When a woman is being troubled or eve-teased,then slapping is a reflex.He was getting pissed off and angry,and slapped her on a reflex.

Laila: Yes, we have studies conducted for the past 20 years - some published. When a woman is being troubled and slaps she does it in self-defense. Asad was not defending himself, he took his anger out on a girl - he knew what he was doing. Don't compare the two to justify what Asad did. 

When Balika vadhu started,nobody thought that they are encouraging child-marriage but now the show has reached a point where the "Balika Vadhu" has become an independent woman.Qubool hai is the same.Maybe this is the point where changes in Asad start to appear.

Laila: And the show did just that hence the reason I do not watch it or want to discuss it. 

You know television is a medium where some shows are trying to change people.Especially in India!Because most cases are seen here and the main audience is women.I agree Zoya should stand up for herself and I think she didn't stand up for herself because she knew his mother was dying!She knew speaking up at the moment was not right!

Laila: Look at your sentence here and then your response in red to me - you contradict yourself. 

I don't understand how I am contradicting myself.Yes I am saying television is a medium and read the underlined sentence in red in my response.

Laila; Either television has power or it doesn't decide

Secondly,they have to show the story line as that because Asad who thinks girls are meant to be in their limits,respect their traditions,culture to the T,not speak up is going to fall for a girl who is completely opposite to his thinking.She is modern, independent and demands that girls should be respected.And she is right in that!She is here to make Asad understand that women have a right to be respected.You cannot form opinions from one episode when there is whole lot to come!Atleast you can further watch the episodes and try to see if they are trying to promote "domestic violence" or maybe trying to curb it.

Laila: It takes one incident for something to be classified as domestic violence - did you know that? No 

One incident can also classify as domestic violence,right?Some parents slap their children when they do something wrong!Is that also classified as domestic violence?No!  

Yes it is. It actually constitutes to a report to child protective services. 

I am not talking about constant beatings,I am just talking about one slap.

Laila: Yes, one slap constitutes it. 


You know what would've been domestic violence if he would've hit Zoya at every time she committed a mistake,if he would have hit Najma when she cut her hair or lied to him.

Laila: Incorrect. BTW, r you an expert in the field? If not, then you're embarrassing yourself cause I am.

No I am not an expert on the field.I have read somewhere that one slap cannot constitute to domestic violence.It depends on an individual-It may be warning bells for one while nothing for another.

Laila: "I have read somewhere" Well, let me tell you it does. 

Do you realize that Asad has made a lot of mistakes regarding Zoya,and he is regretting them.Each time he regrets,the more changes will appear.It is the journey where Zoya is going to change his male chauvinist thinking.

Laila: That is not her job if it comes at the expense of getting abused. 

But that is the story's plot.I am speaking for myself,I am watching the show,because maybe Zoya is here to change Asad.What do you want the story to be then,Asad is perfect and Zoya is perfect and everything happens happily ever after.Sometimes to change something bad you have to show the bad to make the public aware.Shows like crime patrol show the cases to make us aware,but according to you all they are promoting the crimes,right?I'll stop watching the show if they are not going to take any steps to improve Asad's behaviour.But till then I am going to keep hope.I am not judging the show in two episodes.

Laila: Again, it is not her job to fix him.  Actually, I would prefer the show to be about a nonabrasive relationship where two people heal each others wounds. Exactly how is Asad going to heal her wounds when he inflicts them on her each day? You will have to after tomorrow cause he will say sorry and give her cup of coffee and all will be well. 

But they don't make shows for one person,right?You think it is not her job to fix him but the makers do.Yes I will stop watching the show if they continue such behavior.I do not watch the show for its love-story because personally I don't ike AsYa as a couple.I watched the show to see Asad change because there are people like Asad..

Laila: Ok watch it for the reason you want, but be prepared that this will brushed under the rug after tomorrow. 


The slap is not justified but it is necessary for the plot,maybe to change Asad.And KSG and Surbhi are just playing the characters,so now stop blaming them.Nor Zoya is wrong,nor Asad!Both are justifiable in their positions.It is just a matter of opinion of how people see them.

Laila: How was it necessary? Do you build a romance on a slap?

Did I say they are going to build romance on a slap?No.I am saying some people change!You cannot be pessismistic that people don't change.This happens with many people,you know?Children who have grown up seeing divorces,parental fights or suffered in life tend to react unlike some other people.Maybe the show is trying to show that.Now you'll ask me why Zoya is not like that?Because I said SOME.
And the other reason is she's brought up in USA.In some places in India,people keep taunting you when one parent leaves.These things affect how a child has been brought up.Asad has become defensive and impulsive,and doesn't want anything to happen to his mother and sister.Nobody else matters to him!

Laila: Ma'am, I can be anything I want. The show is trying to build a romance on an abusive relationship - that is exactly what you implied when you said it was necessary. Explain otherwise. We know he doesn't want anything to happen to his mother and sister - so what is your point here? That it legitmized slapping her? Confused
 

I just want to conclude that this is not promoting "domestic violence".Do you think a person is going to watch the show and say he is slapping the heroine,I will also slap  other people. If it happened that way,then every husband would be romancing with his wife at every opportunity given as the daily soaps show.If people take wrong things,why can't they take right things?
Instead of going on and about how the show is about domestic violence,you can atleast go and help those people.This site is full of teenagers,your long messages about helping those people isn't going to change their mind.That is why I want the show to raise the issue!Because when the villain does it,the people don't mind but since the main lead is doing this,and they try to change him then maybe people will learn.

Laila: You really are not understanding what this has conveyed to the young girls here do you? You have completely missed the point. When a positive character legitimizes something that is wrong, it is very serious. We have a lot of young impressionable young girls who think this is acceptable...if one girl learns it is not, then everything is well wroth it. 

And what makes you think I don't help people? Mmm? You're awfully rude telling me what to do - kind of like telling me to get lost. Not cool. 


I am sorry if I am sounding rude but I did not mean to offend you.I am not telling that YOU don't help people but some people are just publisizing the show more by talking about the slap.

Laila: So? 


I am not an expert but I do volunteering work for a NGO. I am on the neutral side.I am just telling you it is not worth going on for approx 44 pages because it is going to change the POV of the fangirls.It is better to help people than speak here about the same thing.Because you are going to get the same argument of a "slap" being romantic.I do not in any way support the slap!I am saying I do not like their love-story and so I am not in anyway implying that they become a couple.When I say it is necessary,I was saying that it to show how is Asad's character.He is arrogant,rude and other things you all are telling him to be.

Laila: You write a lot to for someone who thinks we're wasting time doing the same...who r u trying to convince here eh. WinkLOL

From what you have written,I feel that you wouldn't give a second chance to that person but I would give them that.This is each's own POV.And that is why I want to believe that they are going to change Asad.I am not saying one coffee will do that but till then I'll wait and watch.

Laila: Really, what makes you think that I am not who can forgive? Redemption is the key and a sorry and cup of coffee does not cut it...I don't forgive abuse easily - it is a controlled act and few people take ownership and responsibility of it. 

In the end it your choice about what to speak and what not to...

Laila: Yes, that's my right.

But I am not going to talk more and contradict my own thoughts about speaking about the whole thing.I am signing off.Smile

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_AI_Dont_Knowshaz2009nebunacharminggenie

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "Discuss about THE SLAP Here! NO New Topics! (Page 45)" in Qubool Hai forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

nebuna

IF-Dazzler

nebuna

Joined: 17 September 2011

Posts: 4940

Posted: 07 February 2013 at 2:56am | IP Logged
Originally posted by I_Dont_Know

So now people have problem with this thread also! So, what we have to do? Let's drool over Asad Ahmed khan!Angry

Horrible! Zoya will fall in love with this guy!Thumbs Down






very true they become obsessive over a certain character
and fail to identify the diff between real and reel issues and characters
slap and abuse is a real issue which is not given importance
 in the end they start justifying such acts in order to support their characters 
this is not the case only with teens
i have seen married people  with children justifying such characters
because of their obsession 

The following 9 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_AeastmeetswestI_Dont_KnowRadheKrish1shaz2009princessonlinenancy1996RafzLaila2009

S.Stephy

IF-Dazzler

S.Stephy

Joined: 29 September 2010

Posts: 3957

Posted: 07 February 2013 at 10:03am | IP Logged
I've been wondering where is the tehzeeb Asad used to talk about in some of the previous episodes. Surely, the slap, pinning a girl against the wall and taunting someone about their dead mother must all be against the tehzeeb Asad lectured Zoya about. Actually, these days it seems like he doesn't possess even an ounce of tehzeeb and instead comes across as a rowdy-type person...

The following 9 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_AeastmeetswestI_Dont_KnowRadheKrish1shaz2009narangi314RupunzaleLaila2009charminggenie

princessonline

IF-Dazzler

princessonline

Joined: 11 November 2007

Posts: 2792

Posted: 08 February 2013 at 12:29am | IP Logged
So today we got to see the much hyped "I am sorry Zoya" episode but really his apology was depth-less and shallow for lack of better words. He said "sorry" and insulted/was rude to her right after. Someone who is so apologetic does not get annoyed at the slightest thing especially when they the so called apologetic person knows how wrong they have been. Zoya was offering him compassion by telling him that she understands how he feels and was being extremely nice considering the fact that he abused her right, left and center for the past few days, yet, he angrily got up and told her off. This man is crazy and he is driving me insane. He doesn't even talk to her properly afterwards. He asks her if her eyes stopped working as well since he knew her brain didn't work from the start. Now you guys tell me someone who feels really guilty and is sorry for their actions talks and behaves like this? What is really amazing is that he can't tolerate the fact that Zoya was showing him compassion by talking about his father because that is the most painful part of his life yet he berated Zoya just a few hours ago and threw the most painful thing of her life in her face in such a heartless way and he expects a small worthless "sorry" and some coffee to fix his mistake? I am not sure how "sorry" Asad is or if he wholeheartedly even mean that "sorry!" Disgusted is the word.

Riya

The following 10 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_AeastmeetswestRadheKrish1shaz2009narangi314nebunaRupunzaleLaila2009charminggenieRafz

eastmeetswest

Goldie

eastmeetswest

Joined: 03 August 2012

Posts: 1094

Posted: 09 February 2013 at 4:12am | IP Logged
Originally posted by princessonline

So today we got to see the much hyped "I am sorry Zoya" episode but really his apology was depth-less and shallow for lack of better words. He said "sorry" and insulted/was rude to her right after. Someone who is so apologetic does not get annoyed at the slightest thing especially when they the so called apologetic person knows how wrong they have been. Zoya was offering him compassion by telling him that she understands how he feels and was being extremely nice considering the fact that he abused her right, left and center for the past few days, yet, he angrily got up and told her off. This man is crazy and he is driving me insane. He doesn't even talk to her properly afterwards. He asks her if her eyes stopped working as well since he knew her brain didn't work from the start. Now you guys tell me someone who feels really guilty and is sorry for their actions talks and behaves like this? What is really amazing is that he can't tolerate the fact that Zoya was showing him compassion by talking about his father because that is the most painful part of his life yet he berated Zoya just a few hours ago and threw the most painful thing of her life in her face in such a heartless way and he expects a small worthless "sorry" and some coffee to fix his mistake? I am not sure how "sorry" Asad is or if he wholeheartedly even mean that "sorry!" Disgusted is the word.

Riya
 
my sentiments exactly. i will tell you this, people tend to get soo hooked on the actors that they totally ignore the situations in such that they like the actor so they dont care or see any negativity.

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_Ashaz2009Rupunzale

narangi314

IF-Dazzler

narangi314

Joined: 30 November 2009

Posts: 4523

Posted: 10 February 2013 at 11:05am | IP Logged
For those interested in the power of media to create societal change, you might want to read:


I particularly likes this line:

"It bears remembering that changing expectations is the first step to changing reality. "



Cheers
Mira


Edited by narangi314 - 10 February 2013 at 11:20am

The following 7 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_ARadheKrish1shaz2009S.StephyRupunzaleLaila2009charminggenie

Sam3007

Groupbie

Sam3007

Joined: 22 January 2013

Posts: 104

Posted: 10 February 2013 at 12:14pm | IP Logged
The slap was wrong,
no 1 should slap a girl,
But at that state of mind ny1 can do mistakes,
anger, pain, lie, made Asad Slap Zoya...
His ammi was in ICU, n 4 him she was d reason ...

Rupunzale

IF-Dazzler

Rupunzale

Joined: 05 June 2012

Posts: 4730

Posted: 10 February 2013 at 12:19pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by narangi314

For those interested in the power of media to create societal change, you might want to read:


I particularly likes this line:

"It bears remembering that changing expectations is the first step to changing reality. "



Cheers
Mira
hi Mira...thanks for the wonderful article...it really shows that as time has passed media has ignored something like important as women empowerment...it's also ironic that shows  Humlog was sponsored by doordarshan and not private channels as today.

The funny part is I actually exactly something like this from the PH...after promoting domestic violence and then layered it with a mere " I am sorry" they are going ahead with a jungle romance...this is extremely insulting and demeaning to watch such a display of utter nonsense. 

Priyanka

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

Aalia_AmahalaxmikRadheKrish1shaz2009Laila2009

Post Reply New Post

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Qubool Hai Topic Index

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.