Is it OK to be a wife beater? (Page 5)

^^

IMO, feminism unfortunately has a negative connotation. Feminism is merely ensuring equal opportunity, dignity and respect for both men and women and trying to undo generations of patriarchy. If men choose to stand up for their mothers, sisters, wives, daughters and friends, I personally find that impressive and honorable. There are male feminists, and there is absolutely nothing wrong in being one. I'd like to take the negative connotation out of feminism and also combat the stereotypes like mahila mandal and feminazis.

A feminist is someone who has an analysis of gender and power in the world. Everyone should aspire to that, I think. It's a moral response to systemic inequality.

Intent and agenda matter a lot. There are a lot of do-gooders in the world with little actual compassion or analysis of the circumstances of the people they are proclaiming to save. Your posts are supposedly full of outrage against the way women are treated, but they also contain a lot of assumptions within them that I am challenging, and that others have also challenged. When you post something in a debate forum about such a serious topic, you are going to get responses, including critical ones that challenge your assumptions. You don't have to take them up. You could just ignore it if you want.

However, I think it's really counter productive to tell me that I'm "getting worked up" and it's also a really stereotypical response to a critical response from a woman, unfortunately.

I want to make sure you understand something. I am not downplaying gender violence (if any of my posts in ever have, feel free to point out how and where) in any part of the world. It is wrong, but it is also "thick-headed" to blame women for not having a hollywoodesque response to it, where they pick up their things and walk out. Real life is complicated, so just give women who suffer violence some credit. Your over the top characterization of women who are victims/survivors of violence, and your use of extreme stereotypes do not exactly help one discuss this topic with a level of seriousness.

I am opposed to anyone making sweeping generalizations about an entire ethnicity of people or an entire region of the world. Especially when they know so little about all the people in that part of the world who are fighting against oppression in so many ways. It is disrespectful to their struggle, and frankly it follows a racist logic. Not everyone thinks the same way in South Asia because our social position and privilege has a lot to do with what we experience and how we think.

Its not my assumptions its opinions and we all have one just as you do. Besides Im not saving anyone, Im no messiah Im simply speaking out things that I have witnessed first hand.

I think I have been fairly clear, but I won't ask you to read my posts if you don't want to.

You're victimizing yourself as if you've been subject to some kind of attack on this thread. You have simply received some challenges to the assumptions that underlie your opinions, particularly about your repeated generalizations, and about your lack of respect for women's sometimes contradictory and difficult choices in their own lives. How about you respect that?

Actually no, because your response to my response is to say that I must be weak or drinking the kool-aid. You get that that's disrespectful, right? You have no idea about my own life experience or what kind of work against domestic violence I might be involved in. Does it occur to you that maybe you are wrong about some things? That your view on this issue isn't as evolved as you think it is?

BTW, by generalization, I was referring to how you refer to "our community" and "people back home" as if they are all idiots. Which is also disrespectful. There are women in India who could school you on gender violence, left, right and centre.


Edited by --arti-- - 30 January 2013 at 12:42pm