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Which is more important (Page 8)

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rayadallie

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rayadallie

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Posted: 29 January 2013 at 8:40pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by sipokobusak

Originally posted by rayadallie

I have been looking  at PR and following the current storyline with much interest.

Lets say for least argument that Ovi is pregnant with Arjun's child and it was as a result of arjun and ovi mutually consumating their marriage. Both arjun and ovi are unhappy in this marriage as arjun is still in love with purvi and just cannot move on. Ovi on the other hand nags at him and reminds him everyday of purvi.

Purvi on the other hand is pregnant with Arjun's child and we all know how it happened and she also has married to Onir under the circumstances. They are seemingly not in love but do enjoy each other's company and friendship. We do not know onir's past and it seem as if he is an orphan or has a past that he does not wish t relive.

I am just wondering which is really important, staying in a marriage with someone who you do not love just because that person is having your child or marrying to someone you love and makes you happy first and foremost?



of course we should marry someone we love..
but if you already married with someone you do not love..and she having your child..of course the most sensible thing to do is stay with the marriage.

really, for purvi staying in her marriage, i see no problem but arjun sticking it out with ovi. it spells disaster. just my humble opinion


Edited by rayadallie - 30 January 2013 at 6:04pm

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zonan

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Posted: 29 January 2013 at 9:27pm | IP Logged
we saw arjun and ovi now are trying to make their marriage a success.
it become better and better..
purvi and onir are happy..

so they did the right thing.

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m_masti

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Posted: 29 January 2013 at 9:38pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by rayadallie

Originally posted by sipokobusak

Originally posted by rayadallie

I have been looking  at PR and following the current storyline with much interest.

Lets say for least argument that Ovi is pregnant with Arjun's child and it was as a result of arjun and ovi mutually consumating their marriage. Both arjun and ovi are unhappy in this marriage as arjun is still in love with purvi and just cannot move on. Ovi on the other hand nags at him and reminds him everyday of purvi.

Purvi on the other hand is pregnant with Arjun's child and we all know how it happened and she also has married to Onir under the circumstances. They are seemingly not in love but do enjoy each other's company and friendship. We do not know onir's past and it seem as if he is an orphan or has a past that he does not wish t relive.

I am just wondering which is really important, staying in a marriage with someone who you do not love just because that person is having your child or marrying to someone you love and makes you happy first and foremost?



of course we should marry someone we love..
but if you already married with someone you do not love..and she having your child..of course the most sensible thing to do is stay with the marriage.

really, or purvi staying in her marriage, i see no problem but arjun sticking it out with ovi. it spells disaster. just my humble opinion

so if arjun leaves ovi...will he able to make a move with purvi...will purvi accepts him...

if at all purvi leaves onir just to get married to arjun...is it a good thing to do...

purvi-arjun made a decision to go on individual paths after they had consummated...they were in complete senses when they made decision...

when purvi married to onir, she was in complete senses...when arjun married ovi and when he requested for second chance with ovi, he was completely in senses... 

when arjun consummated with ovi, he was in complete senses...

when purvi introduced onir as her husband, she was completely in senses...

so it completely doesn't make sense for Arjun-Purvi to leave their better halves and reunite...on the other hand the better halves has complete freedom of walking away from this Pavitra pair...

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rayadallie

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rayadallie

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Posts: 2849

Posted: 30 January 2013 at 6:35am | IP Logged
Originally posted by m_masti

Originally posted by rayadallie

Originally posted by sipokobusak

Originally posted by rayadallie

I have been looking  at PR and following the current storyline with much interest.

Lets say for least argument that Ovi is pregnant with Arjun's child and it was as a result of arjun and ovi mutually consumating their marriage. Both arjun and ovi are unhappy in this marriage as arjun is still in love with purvi and just cannot move on. Ovi on the other hand nags at him and reminds him everyday of purvi.

Purvi on the other hand is pregnant with Arjun's child and we all know how it happened and she also has married to Onir under the circumstances. They are seemingly not in love but do enjoy each other's company and friendship. We do not know onir's past and it seem as if he is an orphan or has a past that he does not wish t relive.

I am just wondering which is really important, staying in a marriage with someone who you do not love just because that person is having your child or marrying to someone you love and makes you happy first and foremost?



of course we should marry someone we love..
but if you already married with someone you do not love..and she having your child..of course the most sensible thing to do is stay with the marriage.

really, or purvi staying in her marriage, i see no problem but arjun sticking it out with ovi. it spells disaster. just my humble opinion

so if arjun leaves ovi...will he able to make a move with purvi...will purvi accepts him...

if at all purvi leaves onir just to get married to arjun...is it a good thing to do...

purvi-arjun made a decision to go on individual paths after they had consummated...they were in complete senses when they made decision...

when purvi married to onir, she was in complete senses...when arjun married ovi and when he requested for second chance with ovi, he was completely in senses... 

when arjun consummated with ovi, he was in complete senses...

when purvi introduced onir as her husband, she was completely in senses...

so it completely doesn't make sense for Arjun-Purvi to leave their better halves and reunite...on the other hand the better halves has complete freedom of walking away from this Pavitra pair...

Its is fair post but what we do not know yet or or certain, if ovi and arjun actually consummated their marriage and result in ovi's pregnancy. CV's has not shown us anything with respect to that. We can only assume that ovi is indeed pregnant with arjun's child as he is her husband. We will have to wait and see how this all unfolds

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koolsadhu1000

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:30am | IP Logged
The reason i explained the past of Onir point was because it was brought up in this thread and i felt that it was accepted as a reason for getting out of the marraige by Purvi in the Purvi Onir marraige .

So i gave my opinion about how the past point was irrelevant .

But rayadallie i will now give a direct answer if u wish to ur direct and simple question .

If u fall in love and have the fortune to marry that very person , good for u .

If u get married to another person u can get out till  children have not come in the picture if u feel that i just cannot forget the ex

But if children come in the picture , they have to be given priority than any personal feeling of 'love'

Children r a stamp or seal on the institution of marraige .

It then becomes a question of priorities . Children or love ?

Children , as they have a full life ahead of them and they did not ask to come in the world .

For them , one has to make the marraige work . There r no two ways about it .

One cannot go on fretting about past 'love' and break up marraige up for it ...it means you are giving priority to your personal feelings and not giving priority to life of children . It is a selfish act .

This pampering of your emotions even above little children is what i find as extremely spoilt behaviour .

If u put ur mind to it u can make ur marraige a success . U  can love again . Love can be controlled , love can be channelised wisely . 

The excuse for the divorce given is unhappy environment for children .

It seems this environment is there in the Arjun Ovi marraige . And it seems it will be very unhealthy for a child . 

Well who has made the marraige unhappy by just not  accepting Ovi ???

The problem is not from her side . She is ready to be a good wife , is a good bahu to his father and has no problems with him , she is ready to love him and make him happy .

It is he who is just not ready to give her a chance .

It is not even as if the wife is ugly or something . That he has to swallow it and make a big adjustment . Ovi is beautiful . She is ready to make any adjustment for him , she even wore a sari simply as he brought it though she wears dresses .

All she wants is a little love and a chance which he is just not ready to give .

He makes faces like he is swallowing bitter medicene and says 'yeah' with pained eyes .

How ridiculous , immature and spoilt is this decision of just not giving marraige a chance even when children come in the picture  . Even when the wife is ready and willing .

Why go far . See Onir . That marraige is a success and has a loving environment for a child coz he is determined to make it a success . He is determined to give the child a loving environment . That marraige is a success bcoz of him , not bcoz of Purvi and her tyaags .

See Arjun . Onir is determined to make his marraige a success inspite of the child being not his own ...he is determined to do this as he believes that no child deserves an unhappy upbringing . But Arjun is not ready to make any adjustment emotionally even for the sake of his own blood . Constantly with his pained eyes and sighs  and dialogues that he can love only the mother of his child and that he is doing a husband's duty by giving wife the necessities like food , shelter and clothing he gives his wife and marraige the message that love is even more important than children ...one must hang on to the memories for life [ whereas in Jab We Met it was shown it is best flushed down the toilet] he is obstinate about not making his marraige a success .

This obstinacy is hailed as love and applauded and it seems one must be even more obstinate and break up a marraige ...the excuse now being the happiness of the children

Children require stability ...first criteria of their happiness . Broken marraiges and destruction of their stability is not giving them this environment and if the adults need to put a lid on their feelings and grow up , they should .

Anything else is unacceptable .

Love stories on graves of children are the worst examples of spoilt behaviour . 









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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:37am | IP Logged
Kool di SUPERB POST. U r absolutely right. Awesome explanation.

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Kalapi

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:55am | IP Logged
Originally posted by koolsadhu1000

The reason i explained the past of Onir point was because it was brought up in this thread and i felt that it was accepted as a reason for getting out of the marraige by Purvi in the Purvi Onir marraige .

So i gave my opinion about how the past point was irrelevant .

But rayadallie i will now give a direct answer if u wish to ur direct and simple question .

If u fall in love and have the fortune to marry that very person , good for u .

If u get married to another person u can get out till  children have not come in the picture if u feel that i just cannot forget the ex

But if children come in the picture , they have to be given priority than any personal feeling of 'love'

Children r a stamp or seal on the institution of marraige .

It then becomes a question of priorities . Children or love ?

Children , as they have a full life ahead of them and they did not ask to come in the world .

For them , one has to make the marraige work . There r no two ways about it .

One cannot go on fretting about past 'love' and break up marraige up for it ...it means you are giving priority to your personal feelings and not giving priority to life of children . It is a selfish act .

This pampering of your emotions even above little children is what i find as extremely spoilt behaviour .

If u put ur mind to it u can make ur marraige a success . U  can love again . Love can be controlled , love can be channelised wisely . 

The excuse for the divorce given is unhappy environment for children .

It seems this environment is there in the Arjun Ovi marraige . And it seems it will be very unhealthy for a child . 

Well who has made the marraige unhappy by just not  accepting Ovi ???

The problem is not from her side . She is ready to be a good wife , is a good bahu to his father and has no problems with him , she is ready to love him and make him happy .

It is he who is just not ready to give her a chance .

It is not even as if the wife is ugly or something . That he has to swallow it and make a big adjustment . Ovi is beautiful . She is ready to make any adjustment for him , she even wore a sari simply as he brought it though she wears dresses .

All she wants is a little love and a chance which he is just not ready to give .

He makes faces like he is swallowing bitter medicene and says 'yeah' with pained eyes .

How ridiculous , immature and spoilt is this decision of just not giving marraige a chance even when children come in the picture  . Even when the wife is ready and willing .

Why go far . See Onir . That marraige is a success and has a loving environment for a child coz he is determined to make it a success . He is determined to give the child a loving environment . That marraige is a success bcoz of him , not bcoz of Purvi and her tyaags .

See Arjun . Onir is determined to make his marraige a success inspite of the child being not his own ...he is determined to do this as he believes that no child deserves an unhappy upbringing . But Arjun is not ready to make any adjustment emotionally even for the sake of his own blood . Constantly with his pained eyes and sighs  and dialogues that he can love only the mother of his child and that he is doing a husband's duty by giving wife the necessities like food , shelter and clothing he gives his wife and marraige the message that love is even more important than children ...one must hang on to the memories for life [ whereas in Jab We Met it was shown it is best flushed down the toilet] he is obstinate about not making his marraige a success .

This obstinacy is hailed as love and applauded and it seems one must be even more obstinate and break up a marraige ...the excuse now being the happiness of the children

Children require stability ...first criteria of their happiness . Broken marraiges and destruction of their stability is not giving them this environment and if the adults need to put a lid on their feelings and grow up , they should .

Anything else is unacceptable .

Love stories on graves of children are the worst examples of spoilt behaviour . 









Kool, I agree with you.

Besides, why is the assumption being made that Ovi can't be an excellent mother, why can't the Cvs excel Ovi's character, there is already indications that Ovi responds well to Arjun's attention.

And btw, if divorce does happen and Arjun/Purvi married, what will the child grow up thinking of Arjun, the father – both kids. That dad left one child's mother to marry a mausi – what kind of the 'feeling' of abandonment will this lead to in the child. And the other child will know that he was illegitimate to begin with and to give him name, his dad left his mausi and his cousin – well, how will both kids feel in reality – definitely not love for their bio father…. are we saying anything is acceptable as long as Arjun Purvi unites...

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 10:32am | IP Logged
Well, no matter how much Onir cares or loves Purviz child , it will never be able to match up the love Arjun will have for this child... He is its father after all...
And frankly i think if Purvi and Arjun decide to stay and make it work with their better halves its gonna b a disaster because obviously not only their hearts are with each other, they also do have a child together. They will continue ruining their lives even more if they keep pushing their respective marriages. They will create an unhealthy environment for both d children. I shudder at the thought of wot Oviz child will turn out to be growning up in such an environment. And when Purviz child grows up he/she will become aware that his mom doesnt love his dad but some other man who is also his/her father.
Arvi should break free from their so called marriages. They will create a whole big a mess but atleast they will be happy and have each other and not ruin their and their childrenz lives :)

Edited by Missscarlett - 30 January 2013 at 10:37am

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