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Online Lahari.

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Lahari.

Joined: 06 October 2012

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Posted: 20 January 2013 at 2:59pm | IP Logged
Is this an OS? I gather this from the fact that you didn't put down an index.

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had2bu

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Idle had2bu

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Posted: 20 January 2013 at 3:02pm | IP Logged
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Idle had2bu

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Posted: 20 January 2013 at 3:45pm | IP Logged
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Idle -publicenemy-

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-publicenemy-

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Posted: 20 January 2013 at 4:30pm | IP Logged
I have always thought that writing moments rather than a plot was infinitely more satisfying... and you have captured that so very poignantly here... 
For some reason, I couldn't help but feel like he was a Pawan... he evoked the same sort of visceral response... so very strong, both playful and heartbreaking... 

The way you left off... it gives hope... her yearning would be enough to make him hold on...

-Devi

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Idle had2bu

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Posted: 20 January 2013 at 4:39pm | IP Logged
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Online palindrome

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palindrome

Joined: 25 August 2012

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Posted: 21 January 2013 at 5:29am | IP Logged
This "OS" reminded me of an old incident.My best friend was offered summer training in a famous cancer hospital but she rejected it.I asked her the reason for rejection after few days and she told me that she was feeling uneasy at the place..She was unable to put her reason in the words but your os did it for me...I was able to understand her that day but after reading this piece i can feel what she would have felt!!!...Hospital is a place which differentiates the word "Silence" from "Solitude"...!!!
He hoped the doctor had some good news for him. More for her than himself, he was anxious. 
Sometimes her efforts to appear brave defeated him the most.
You did not give an "end" to os but I believe "he" would be fine very soon because he is anxious for his wife ..More than him getting fit and fine,he wants to see "her" fine..!!!Its not his pain but her pain,which is troubling him..and It would give him strength to fight...!!!Her pain won't let him die..because he know he has to live for her...!!!!
One of the most wonderful writings i have ever came across on IF..ClapClapYour words would have touched each and every reader's heart and brain...Smile
I am so glad to see you writing finally...You have hidden your talent for a long time..Thank you so much for showing as well as sharing it with us...!!!!


Edited by palindrome - 22 January 2013 at 2:37am

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Idle TheBrat

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Online palindrome

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palindrome

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Posted: 21 January 2013 at 5:51am | IP Logged
Originally posted by TheBrat

R
i am back from wedding..and first thing i saw was your note on "WOL" thread...IHonestly telling it was little heart breaking for me...
but I understand the reason behind it...Smileso all the best...!!!
PS-I am so happy to see you reserving a place here after reading your note..I was expecting complete "absence" from you..But you are here and i am on "Cloud 9"..Big smileKahin toh darshan honge tumhare...
PPS- sorry avi for all this but control hi nahi hua...Tongue


Edited by palindrome - 21 January 2013 at 5:48am

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