Debate Mansion

   

Marriage is a necessity? (Page 4)

Post Reply New Post

Page 4 of 10

-Carrie-

IF-Rockerz

-Carrie-

Joined: 03 June 2010

Posts: 7043

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 10:30am | IP Logged
Originally posted by LovesLowCulture

Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

No. I've certain notions and I don't want to compromise in life. Single life is happier, healthier and I think it's boring to spend it with just one person. 

Life is a chaotic mess to me, and marriage and monogamy seem to offer some sense of stability. Although, I don't know if my feelings are the result of something innate or years of socialization. 
 
Brilliant!Clap Hit it on the head, you did.Thumbs Up Stability is definitelya plus point in monogamy because I have seen women drift from one man to another & in the process lose their self worth & contentment.

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

LovesLowCulture-Swetha-zorrro

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "Marriage is a necessity? (Page 4)" in Debate Mansion forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

NigelMolesworth

IF-Dazzler

NigelMolesworth

Joined: 29 December 2012

Posts: 2770

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 10:41am | IP Logged
Originally posted by LovesLowCulture

Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

No. I've certain notions and I don't want to compromise in life. Single life is happier, healthier and I think it's boring to spend it with just one person. 

Life is a chaotic mess to me, and marriage and monogamy seem to offer some sense of stability. Although, I don't know if my feelings are the result of something innate or years of socialization. 


I don't know. I think life's simpler when you've the reign. I believe in monogamy too till the relationship lasts. :)

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

LovesLowCultureDiva-In-Armor

BirdieNumNum

Senior Member

BirdieNumNum

Joined: 07 October 2012

Posts: 967

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 10:43am | IP Logged

depends. If you can keep getting what you want single all your life and dont have to work too hard to get fresh supply, you'd probably not want marriage. Why keep having daal when you can enjoy different biryani every day of the week?WinkLOL 

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

cl0wnmr.ass

LovesLowCulture

Senior Member

LovesLowCulture

Joined: 11 December 2012

Posts: 776

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 11:27am | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

Originally posted by LovesLowCulture

Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

No. I've certain notions and I don't want to compromise in life. Single life is happier, healthier and I think it's boring to spend it with just one person. 

Life is a chaotic mess to me, and marriage and monogamy seem to offer some sense of stability. Although, I don't know if my feelings are the result of something innate or years of socialization. 


I don't know. I think life's simpler when you've the reign. I believe in monogamy too till the relationship lasts. :)

I don't do so well on my own. 
I am in favor of serial monogamy. I realize it's too myopic of me to think I can spend my life with one person. I might change, circumstances may change. 
Luckily, marriage, the contract as recognized by my country's laws, rewards people like me. 
As for marriage, the desi social institution, I don't think there's a lot of room there for serial monogamists. Unless, you're a straight man. 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

-Carrie-

LovesLowCulture

Senior Member

LovesLowCulture

Joined: 11 December 2012

Posts: 776

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 11:35am | IP Logged
Originally posted by DuttaSweetheart

 
Brilliant!Clap Hit it on the head, you did.Thumbs Up Stability is definitelya plus point in monogamy because I have seen women drift from one man to another & in the process lose their self worth & contentment.

I've seen a lot of men and women lose their self worth and contentment in marriages too, DS LOL

It just depends on the person. I realized, pretty recently, that I do want to be married Smile. On the other hand, I have friends who really don't want to be married either because they're skeptical of monogamy or because they see the institution of marriage as archaic and oppressive Smile

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

cl0wnNigelMolesworth-Carrie-

NigelMolesworth

IF-Dazzler

NigelMolesworth

Joined: 29 December 2012

Posts: 2770

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 5:41pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by LovesLowCulture

Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

 

I don't know. I think life's simpler when you've the reign. I believe in monogamy too till the relationship lasts. :)

I don't do so well on my own. 
I am in favor of serial monogamy. I realize it's too myopic of me to think I can spend my life with one person. I might change, circumstances may change. 
Luckily, marriage, the contract as recognized by my country's laws, rewards people like me. 
As for marriage, the desi social institution, I don't think there's a lot of room there for serial monogamists. Unless, you're a straight man. 


Yes, circumstances. I'm a career-driven single woman in my 20s and I find marriage stifling. The compromise people make in relationships is not for me. It's easy to choose friends, acquintance but you're stuck with a spouse. :) Single status helps me to be moody, lazy, careless...be myself. Unnecessary attachments suffocate me. Though I'd never say never.


Read this some months ago. 




Edited by -Iconoclast- - 24 January 2013 at 5:37pm

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

LovesLowCulture-Swetha-Diva-In-Armorreturn_to_hadesSamraat_92

LovesLowCulture

Senior Member

LovesLowCulture

Joined: 11 December 2012

Posts: 776

Posted: 24 January 2013 at 8:57pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Iconoclast-

Yes, circumstances. I'm a career-driven single woman in my 20s and I find marriage stifling. The compromise people make in relationships is not for me. It's easy to choose friends, acquintance but you're stuck with a spouse. :) Single status helps me to be moody, lazy, careless...be myself. Unnecessary attachments suffocate me. Though I'd never say never.


Read this some months ago. 



Thanks for sharing this with me, Iconoclast :) . I'm familiar with Putnam's work and Turkle's older work (when she was still a techno-optimist), but what pleasantly surprised me was Klinenberg's refreshing take on being alone. I think it's very important to make the distinction between "loneliness" and "being alone, " and I'm glad that Klinenberg credits the rise of communications technology (especially social media) for blurring the boundaries between social interaction and isolation.

I realize I'm getting off topic... 

...I think our respective circumstances allow us to make marriage a choice. I've decided to choose compromise over (perceived?) chaos. And you, autonomy over compromise.
 
I don't think most desi women are as lucky. Societal norms, sometimes coupled with a lack of financial stability, make marriage a necessity. But with more and more women back in the homeland getting a good education and settling into careers before thinking about marriage, I think we're bound to see some positive change. 

The following 4 member(s) liked the above post:

-Swetha-Diva-In-ArmorNigelMolesworth-Carrie-

cl0wn

IF-Dazzler

cl0wn

Joined: 28 December 2009

Posts: 2769

Posted: 25 January 2013 at 11:56am | IP Logged
Originally posted by drummedup

Is marriage a necessity? I have always felt that marriage is not a 'need'. It works for some and doesn't for others.So why attach the religious significance to it and make it a compulsory thing in life? Is it because society does not respect unmarried people enough? specially girls? or is it to be on safe side? To have someone in old age to take care of you? Personally speaking,I'm not the kind to fall in love and I know I'll be a lot happier alone. So, I'd love to live with my parents as long as they live and then go my own way. My priorities are work, my parents and knowledge(worldly and spiritual) I neither have time nor interest to take care of another person and his family. I'd like to do good to a large number of people through my work than concentrate myself to a home and man.Is it being selfish, unreligious and blah blah blah ?Why is it so scandalous and blasphemes?LOL I don't understand... Indian society baffles me!


To begin with, the answer is obviously NO... why should it be a necessity? Each person has the right to live the way they want to. Religion is not relevant here for me because I believe that the real GOD lies within you, it's your own conscience and what matters the most is one's own happiness. If you're happy doing something, do it. If not, don't pressurize yourself, even GOD won't be happy seeing you unhappy. Simple as that! Tongue

And who cares about society? Are you really willing to sacrifice your own happiness to satisfy the so-called 'norms' of the society? Is the society going to come and console/help you in your hard times? IMO, life's too short to worry about that. Yeah, it's not easy to ignore this side of the story completely, infact there are so many people who succumb to societal pressures. It's a sad thing. It should never be this way! It's 2013 ffs!

Now finally coming to you, I think it's a matter of personal choice. If you feel you're not the type to fall in love or you aren't interested or have the time to take care of someone else's family, then so be it. It's your life, your choices! But then again, remember, this is what you're feeling RIGHT NOW... it may very possibly change later... you never know! For me, I am yet to discover the same thing myself.. the solution is to take each day as it comes.. and most importantly, always listening to your heart and doing exactly what YOU want!

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

LoveToLaughLovesLowCultureSamraat_92

Post Reply New Post

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Topic Starter Replies Views Last Post
Physical Love and its necessity

2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

The_Other_Woman 76 5207 25 January 2011 at 9:29am
By Jugnu_244
love marriage vs arrange marriage mspari 3 4139 16 October 2008 at 10:19pm
By Huduga
Arranged marriage or love marriage uk-girl 3 2325 31 July 2008 at 1:28am
By Anuradha
Love marriage VS Arrange marriage The_Other_Woman 4 2364 16 February 2008 at 5:57am
By raj5000
Necessity is the Mother of Invention

2 3 4 5

Autumn. 33 1693 10 May 2007 at 12:04am
By qwertyesque

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Debate Mansion Topic Index

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.