"Aarti,
I need to see you."
His
voice.
That darned voice... it made her want to collapse in a heap on the floor and
cry her eyes out. It made her want to beg, beg for him to come back. Her aching
chest felt like it would explode. How could she feel this way? After all these
months, how could she still want him so much?
"I -- I," she started to say, desperately
wanting to see him, to feel him
again.
Before she managed to say anything else,
she felt Yash's strong arms wrap around her waist. She felt his nose nuzzle
her neck and she wasn't able to speak. Suddenly all of this felt wrong, it felt
very wrong. She was horrible.
She felt tears escape her eyes and she
pressed end on her phone before she could say anything. She couldn't do this.
Not in front of Yash. She felt Yash's lips on her neck and she felt dirty. Forcefully, she pushed him off
her, causing him to stagger backwards.
She picked up her bag and started to head
for the door without saying a word to him.
"Aarti!" he called out. "What happened?
Sorry if I did something wrong..."
She was out of the door before he could say
anything else. Tears flowed freely down her cheeks.
You
did something very wrong Yash, very wrong. You and I. We were very wrong. I can
never forgive myself.
"Aarti?" she heard Prateek's confused voice
in the distance, reminding her that Prateek was Yash's brother. What would he
think now? What would everyone think? Could she get any worse? She ignored him
and kept on walking.
Once she was outside, she felt a hand grab
her arm.
"Aarti, let me drop you," Yash said from
behind her.
She jerked his hand off and walked faster,
unable to look at him, unable to say anything.
"I'm sorry!" he said again. "I'm very
sorry. I promise, I'll ask before doing anything next time."
She wiped her eyes with the back of her arm
before turning around and facing him. She looked him directly in the eye and
whispered, "This is never happening
again."
Yash looked shocked. She closed her eyes.
She didn't want to answer his questions; she didn't want to tell him what
happened. He looked so innocent. It was way too hard to hate him, when it was
her fault, all her fault.
"It won't," he finally said, "If that's
what you want, it won't."
"Good."
"Did I really hurt you that much?" he asked
guiltily, looking at her swollen eyes.
"No. You didn't hurt me," she muttered.
"Then let me drop you home."
She nodded. "Fine."
When they were in the car, Yash broke the
silence.
"Aarti, are you sure everything is
alright?"
"Everything's fine," she said firmly.
"Should I pick you up tomorrow?"
"Pick me up?" she asked rudely.
"I mean to teach you."
"Oh."
She squeezed her hands tightly together and
nodded.
"Okay," he said, slowing down outside her
hostel.
"Thanks," she said quietly, and left the
car without looking back at him.
She ran into her hostel room and shut the
door quickly behind her. She took out her phone and looked at the number that
had just called. Should she call back? No. What position was she in to call
Prashant right now? She was a horrible person. She essentially cheated on him.
She knew she wasn't together with him anymore, but her heart was still with him. Nobody said that you needed to be in a relationship
to cheat on someone.
She looked into the mirror across from her
bed and felt disgusted by the sight in front of her. She was the world's most
horrible person. She was a bloody cheater!
It was early, but nevertheless, she
squeezed her pillow tightly and cried herself to sleep. It was something she
hadn't done for months.
The next day, she worked on Calculus with
Yash at the library. They behaved formally with each other, pretending the last
two days didn't happen. They spent a few hours studying, before Yash dropped
her home and she gave him a reserved smile.
This went on for two more months. They met
up nearly every day and studied. But they left it at that. He was just her
tutor. Not her friend, not her boyfriend, not anything. Just her tutor. He didn't
mean anything else to her.
There wasn't a night that passed by in
those two months in which she didn't wonder what Prashant wanted. She answered
his phone call and met him in her dreams, imagining that he wanted to get back
together with her.
After the two months were over, she started
to block him from her thoughts again. She became way too preoccupied with
university to dwell over him for too long. She hadn't told Mansi or Sunita
about Prashant's call or her and Yash's closeness. She wasn't ready to share
any of that with anyone just yet.
One month before the final exams, Aarti and
Yash were in the library. The thought of Yash graduating and leaving her behind
made her feel sad, but she knew it was for the best. She had often stared at
Yash, finding him incredibly attractive, wanting to get closer, but managing to
stop herself each time. She had to control herself. She couldn't cheat on
Prashant. Not anymore. Never again.
"Can I ask you something?" he asked her
while checking over her solution to a complex question.
She nodded.
"We've gotten distant, even though we meet
almost every day. Why is that?"
Aarti nervously looked away and felt her
heart start to beat rapidly. "Uh... I just... it got awkward," she told him. It
was a lie. She didn't feel awkward with him at all. In fact, she felt very
comfortable. She wanted to spend more and more time with him every single day
and she wanted to tell him that, but she reminded herself that she was cheating
on Prashant. This was the only way she could control herself.
"Okay then," Yash said. Aarti knew from his
tone that he didn't believe her. Why should he? There was no reason to believe
her.
He went back to looking at her solution
while she looked at his lips, wanting to get closer, wanting to touch them with
her own.
Prashant,
she thought to herself and was shaken out of her reverie once again.
Before she knew it, the final exams had
passed and the results were released. She checked the bulletin board until she
saw her name, and a huge smile crossed her face. Aarti Gupta, top of the class in calculus III, 100%. Whoever said
that working hard made the impossible possible was right. She got a cent
percent in the subject she was weakest at! Although she was expecting a high
mark because she knew she had done her exam really well and wasn't stumped on
any questions, it was a pleasant surprise! Yash had prepared her very well.
"Yash," she whispered, feeling like the
world's happiest person. She needed to share this with him. He had to know!
She called him on her mobile. "I need to
see you!" she said happily.
They met up at a park. As soon as Aarti saw
him, she felt her eyes get teary. She suddenly felt like she was seeing him in
a different light.
"How were your results?" she asked, trying
to conceal her excitement, and attempting to sound as sane as possible.
"Normal," he said with a shrug. "How were
your results?"
"Normal meaning?"
she asked, curiously.
"I graduated with high honours."
She grinned widely. "Really?" she asked,
happy for him. She wondered how on Earth that was normal, but then remembered that it was Yash Scindhia she was
talking to. Of course it'd be a normal thing for him.
He smiled back at her, "Yeah. How were your
marks? How was calculus?"
"Yash," she said breathlessly, "You...
don't know how much I... how much I need to tell you this. You are amazing."
She walked closer to him and held on to his
biceps. They were very hard. He was so muscular.
"I got a hundred percent in calculus, and got high honours in everything else!"
she shrieked happily.
She threw her arms around him and pressed
her cheek against his. He hugged her back tightly. "I'm so proud of you," he
said with a big smile. His tone proved to her that he was genuinely very happy.
He was just as excited as she was. She felt her stomach do flip flops when he
said that. Suddenly, her achievement felt more rewarding.
She moved her face off his and looked into
his eyes, seeing honesty and truthfulness in them. She didn't know why she
wanted to say I love you to him. She
didn't know why she wanted to hold him forever. She didn't know why she wanted
to go closer than ever. It might have been what she felt in the heat of the
moment, or she might have genuinely felt all of this for him. Right now, her
mind and heart were both way too fuzzy to care.
She couldn't think of anything else except
her accomplishment and the man who made it possible.
She crushed her lips against his and didn't for
one moment, feel guilty about it. In fact, she forgot why she was supposed to
feel guilty in the first place. This, right here, was what heaven meant. This,
right here, was all she wanted.
He kissed her back passionately. Months of
pent up sexual tension got released as they kissed. They wanted to get closer
to each other; they didn't care about the consequences this time. They needed
each other badly right now.
Yash broke the kiss and led her towards his
car. He opened the door of the backseat and she got in. He followed suit. She
thanked God that Yash's car had tinted windows.
They carried on with what they were doing
before, except this time it got a hundred times more intense. Their breathing
got heavier and their hearts were pounding feverishly. He reached under her shirt and pulled it up
over her head, as she started to unbutton his. Their lips were fervently moving
together as they struggled to remove all the clothes that were acting as a
barrier between their bodies. Just as Aarti was sliding his shirt off his
shoulders, Yash grabbed her hand to stop her.
"Wait," he said softly.
He reached into his pockets and grabbed his
wallet, he fumbled with it for a few moments until it opened and he found what
he was looking for. Looking at the condom, she remembered where she was and
where they were going.
She held on to her shirt tightly and put it
back on.
"We can't," she said, stopping him.
She could sense his disappointment, but he
nodded and put it back inside his pocket. "I'm sorry."
"No... you didn't do anything. I'm just not
ready for this."
Yash smiled at her as he buttoned up his
shirt.
"It's hot in here," he said, trying to make
conversation.
She nodded, feeling light headed. She didn't
know why being in his presence made her this way. She slid herself closer to
him and rested her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her and
kissed the top of her head.
"Thank you," she whispered blissfully. "Because
of you, I did really well in calculus. I would have never thought that I could
achieve it."
"No, it isn't because of me. It's all your
hard work."
She snuggled in closer to him and closed
her eyes. She didn't want to leave. This moment was way too precious... she
forgot everything when she was in his arms. It was just the two of them, one
Yash, one Aarti, and nobody else.
They sat together and talked until it got
dark. Then Yash untangled himself from Aarti and opened the door, but Aarti
grabbed his wrist.
"Yashhh, I don't want to go home," she moaned.
"Let's go outside then," he suggested, "It's
nice."
It really was. There was a cool breeze and
the stars shined ever so brightly in the sky. She laced her finger through Yash's
and they walked hand in hand until they spotted a bench. Sitting down, she laid
her head on his shoulder again and he held her close to him.
"Yash, can I say something?" she said
serenely, starting to feel nervous.
"Hmm?" he asked.
"I really like you," she whispered, her
heart pounding inside her.
He let go of her and turned around to face
her.
"Really?" he asked, sounding unconvinced.
She nodded. "I do, I really do."
She was being completely truthful.
"Oh, well that isn't a shock. I like me
too," he said playfully.
She hit his arm, "Yash!"
He chuckled. "Calm down you bully, I like
you too."
She smiled, feeling her cheeks burn. She
looked into his eyes again, finding nothing but honesty and sincerity in them.
"Prove it," she teased.
"That's not fair. You said it first, so you
prove it first!"
She laughed sarcastically. "Yeah right. You've got to prove it to me."
"Alright, fine," he said light-heartedly, "I'll
prove it to you."
He cupped her cheeks in his hands, and
looking straight into her eyes, said, "Aarti will you let me show you off to
the world as mine?"
Aarti's jaw dropped open. She didn't know
how to respond. She liked Yash, she liked him a lot, but she hadn't been ready
for a relationship and neither had he. But that was months ago. Right now, she didn't
want to say no. In fact, she desperately wanted to say yes, she wanted to be
with Yash and only him.
She forced herself to think about Prashant,
but strangely, she didn't feel anything this time. It didn't cause her the same
pain it caused her a few months ago. Was this what they called moving on? Was
this what it meant to get over someone? The realization that Prashant no longer
mattered to her was her second victory for the day. Right now, all she could
see was in front of her. Yash.
"Yes," she breathed out in response to his
question. "I will be yours."
Her heart was jumping around wildly inside
of her chest. She felt a strong desire to lean forward and kiss him senseless
right now, but he beat her to it. He pulled her body towards him and his lips captured
her mouth hungrily. She responded with equal fervor until they broke the kiss
and gasped for air. That was when Yash intertwined his fingers with Aarti's,
and they sat there in the same tranquil atmosphere for the rest of the night.
Before they knew it, the night dawned on them and they fell asleep in each other's
arms.
When Aarti went home the next day, she knew
what she had to do for a proper closure. She took out her phone and dialed his number. Before she could hear his
voice, she said, "I'm ready to meet you"
as fast as she could and hung up while her heart pounded violently.