Debate Mansion

   

Debate : Who is Respnsible? (Page 4)

Post Reply New Post

Page 4 of 30

.dream-catcher.

IF-Stunnerz

.dream-catcher.

Joined: 07 March 2011

Posts: 26081

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 11:15am | IP Logged
Mindset of the people is of course the main root of the problem but here I see is people blaming men. Let us look to this matter with a different view. Men are of course the culprit but we women/girls are no less. Just think do we respect our gender? NO! We don't. Every other minute we criticize a female. Think of the person you hate most and 90% of you will definitely think of a girl. Many girls do wrong thing, its not right but we behind their back make stories out of it and keep discussing it in open. One may think whats wrong in it but without knowing anything and just by making assumptions we almost spoil the character image of a girl. Is it right? Doing so, things pass on from a girl to boy, from women to men. Now hearing all such imaginary stories what may men think? That girls don't have a character. Its the thing. Just for instance take you have a friend group and so does you brother have one. We girls tend to less loyal and less honest as in compare to boys. We girls aren't loyal! Accept it.
In no way am I defending boys. They ARE wrong but we girls are no less.
Its about mindset, but not just of men. Its of women too. How? Because women are ready to accept that they are inferior, making men think they are superior. In our everyday we have a evidence. Our mother and we, we tend to obey every small thing we are old too. Right or wrong never matters. We see our mother asking permission from dad for every small thing but ever seen dad taking permission from mother? NO! They don't. WHY? Cause we think, its men job. It is. But women's too. Men are to decide what color curtains we put in home, but are women to decide what color of chair should their husband keep in their office? Yes they have right and they should but they DON'T.
But you all mus be think how does this encourage such inhumane activities. Then when all these happen we see it out little brothers see it, our elder brother see it. Our brother from that time onward develop a sense of superiority thinking we women are nothing but just a robot who work on their order. Gradually as they grow up and things don't work out for them they want something that should satisfy them. Finding nothing they either start taking up drugs or look out for a girl for sexual need and pleasure. Here girl does not mean females up to age of 16-25 or somewhere near but it maybe a child of 5 years or a women age somewhat similar to our grandmother. What they die for is sexual pleasure. Same goes with men. Rape is not committed by boys of age 18-28 but as we saw boys of age 13 too and men of age 45, 61 too.
So what is it leading to? Contamination. Contamination of human mind.
Other factors are of course there but I am not stating them as everyone already did. This was something I didn't saw anywhere so I thought I should put this up.
And one more thing, we girls are born with a inborn moral and that is dignity. We are expected that we maintain dignity of our family, of our nation. It doesn't mean we are not allow to wear knee-length dress but there is specific way. Comparing India and US is of no use cause what I believe is US has its own culture and India too has it own. Both countries ought to differ.

One more thing, sensual scenes in movie like kissing, just kissing doesn't provoke one. Kissing never does. What does the way women are shown. Their character, they are shown cheap. Advertisement. Just I was check my post and see it is there. Wont it make men shift their gaze from main content to this? Not men, if any of you too saw wont you shift your gaze? These are what provokes one. I forgot the name but the girl released her nude picture after KKR won. Good enough? NO!

Okay I decided not to post the adv. here maybe I may get banned due to reason but we often find such adv.

P.S. Its just my views.


Edited by --Pooja- - 13 January 2013 at 12:21am

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

shri kannan-Alina.Sneha113

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "Debate : Who is Respnsible? (Page 4)" in Debate Mansion forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

dmgloverforever

Senior Member

dmgloverforever

Joined: 08 November 2011

Posts: 567

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 12:25pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by meghasingh

First of all I would like to say...really good topic...Clap

and now coming to the point...directly if I have to say then it is mentality, it is rooted in our society, in our culture, our patriarchal society which induces the difference between a girl and a boy even before their birth. Clothes can provoke rape...it is completely dumb and absolutely nonsense and another excellent example how blame is shifted on women for everything wrong.

I would like to give an example for those who live in India, especially girls...everyone of us would had definitely faced the difference between a girl and a boy, if not in their family then outside for sure... it's not just about rape, but little things which we chose to ignore...many times me too bcz vulgar comments are so common that you just can't counter them everytime, but when i can, i do...and it is a real incident of my life...not any rural area, but CP...we were four girls at the metro station, and two guys passed comments and gestures on us... we countered them, ultimately they were quiet but then an enough decent looking comments... "agar itne sharif ho toh is waqt aise kapdon mein akele kya kar rahi ho..?" we felt screwed up for a moment... but it's the mentality and the ethics which parents induce in their children.
For me as an individual, it's almost impossible to even think that how can such men exist, but from my personal experience that clothes, alcohol nothing provokes... if you do have a proper mentality then you can't even think of harming anyone... I do have many guys in my life like this, and they give me hope...really...thankfully in my life all the men and guys i love are really wonderful.

Waiting for the day when we girls would be able to walk without any fear wearing whatever we want, and our parents won't worry about us at any time day or night.


I loved your comment about Bollywood movies and their portrayal of women as sex toys In fact I even hit like for it and as for the incident you narrated I'm glad you and your friends were able to make it to saftey :) 


Now coming to the point that "Clothes" don't provoke. I forgot to touch upon that in my comment and here's my two cents. I don't know how to say this without sounding regressive or insensitive, But in my opinion, clothes do provoke. Period.  
A man is physically attracted to a woman and similarly women are physically attracted to men, same goes for homosexual individual and we can't deny that because sex is a basic need for human beings, it's a natural instinct. So a man is going to stare at a woman who is wearing revealing clothes not because he has a bad mentality but because he's naturally conditioned to do so. Same goes for a woman, I know I would stare at a guy walking by with a muscular figure, now I might not be thinking about sex or rape but there is the attraction and that's undeniable. Similarly the man staring at the woman might not be thinking about rape or sex but the sight is pleasing to his eyes. can't do anything about it.  Now if that man was a nutcase he might end up doing something repulsive for all we know. 
I know the idea sounds crazy that  woman shouldn't wear revealing clothes  because some nutjob doesn't have enough resistance but at the end of the day I'd rather have my safety and my peace of my mind rather then walking outside with a bikini on because I have the independence to do so and men should have better control over their instincts.
I know it's not fair, but what would you rather have? 



The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

-Alina.Sneha113

meghasingh

IF-Sizzlerz

meghasingh

Joined: 20 June 2012

Posts: 11111

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 12:38pm | IP Logged
@dmgloverforever I don't agree much, but probably I got what you wanna say...look I know attraction is very basic human nature, yeah i do admit if a good looking guy or even shirtless actor is on the screen it catches up my attention and i do admire it.
But the thing is that sex and rape aren't connected anywhere...sex is a pleasure, a bliss, natural desire but rape is nothing but denying one's individuality and violence. honestly in bollywood, mostly it's not skin show which irritates me, but the character women do have.
Clothes are just an excuse, otherwise rapes of 3 year old girl and 80 year old woman would had never happened.
It's more in our culture, our society...women are nothing but commodity for men, and thanks to many f**ked up factors men cant think women are human beings too.

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

..DamonCrazy..

dmgloverforever

Senior Member

dmgloverforever

Joined: 08 November 2011

Posts: 567

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 1:19pm | IP Logged
@Megha: I agree with what you said to a great extent and I respect your opinion.Some men do consider women a commodity and this behavior is being condoned by Bollywood movies and  it's truly unfortunate.
Now coming to sex and rape not being connected, sex and rape are unfortunately correlated, not directly but indirectly. The deprivation of sex, the inability of a man to fulfill his need the proper way or as you called it  the "bissful" way leads to improper ways such as rape. 
And though you have a valid point that  "Clothes are just an excuse, otherwise rapes of 3 year old girl and 80 year old woman would had never happened." It can be argued that  the revealing clothes in this case might serve as a fodder to this man's erotic fantasies and hence his sexual frustration might result in him actually trying to rape a 3 year old or an 80 year old for that matter to get that satisfaction because kids and older women are the most vulnerable targets.  
So the vulgarity and the skin show is a factor and it can't be denied in my eyes.

And I know It might sound unfair for women to have restraints because some nutcase out there doesn't , but like I said before, I would rather have my safety and my peace of mind.
Sometimes we need to step away from what's "conventionally" fair and unfair and think about the bigger picture. 








Edited by dmgloverforever - 12 January 2013 at 1:17pm

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Sneha113

-Grace-

IF-Rockerz

-Grace-

Joined: 06 June 2008

Posts: 8309

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 3:02pm | IP Logged
some people blame the women for their unacceptable appearance and clothing sometimes it is the women's fault (im not saying it is, but it depends on the intention if she is dressing for attention) and even if she is doing so for attention is the man so vulnerable to lose control and commit such a crime? 

sometimes the rapist himself has some sort of incident leading him to commit such a crime in the name of revenge/justice 

what needs to be done is that people need to talk about this issue, just talking about this issue is considered inappropriate so obviously problems cannot be solved without talking. 

this is all i have to say for now, if anything will come back later and edit. 

p.s. thanks for opening this thread, I hope no one is offended by my views. 

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Sneha113

KhotaSikaShreya

Viewbie

KhotaSikaShreya

BollyCurry Script Supervisor

Joined: 30 November 2010

Posts: 128005

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 3:19pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by -najmeen-

Rape is unforgivable crime .Some blame the woman , some blame the man and some strangely blame the fate .Its a cluster of reasons which lead to a criminal awakening of  rape.


Dis-respect to women

Well living in an Indian society made me realize how so ever bend they make the rules towards women ,its not going to help unless the normal people start respecting woman.Today the situation is such that we women cant go back home with full confidence that we will be back home safe. Why is woman not given the respect she deserves? Man,whether they say or not ,they consider women beneath them. According to a engineering student(3rd year-senior of mine) he thinks women are made for manly pleasure. Dis respect to women is written all over his words.

Still asking the women to change,not the men
why are the great so called 'swami's' and politicians after women asking them to wear cultural dresses? Why cant we wear the dress we prefer? Do we go and harass men if they are walking on road without a shirt ? Then why cant men follow the same path and let us live our life? Even women wearing salwar suits are raped, why dont we have anyone asking the men not to bother women?

Women are asked not to go out after 7 PM . Firstly , dont rape occur in morning? what is the fault of the girl? Did she go to the guy asking to rape? If a parent has two children one child is mischievous and other is polite , the mischievous one creates problem ,parents scold the mischievous child and take him into the right path .Right? why dosnt this rule apply in rape cases? Why cant the society ask the men not to go out since they are the problem creaters?


Society is not bothered

The whole society is protesting against the delhi rape victim's death , still rapes are happening in this society. People are not bothered to go on the realistic side. The victim was on road bleeding without any help for around 2 hours. Its time for the society to let the action speak rather than the wordly protest.

Lenient rules.
When the crime is so big, why are the rules so culprit sided? why is it that raping and going for a 14 year jail period coming back seem such a simple process?  Some one said it right ,"If the girl was sent to Singapore for better treatment ,the culprits should be sent to Saudi Arabia for better punishment"




You said everything so well. Much of what I wished to say has been said by you.

The worst part is that the society wasn't bothered to help. For 2 hours, these 2 victims lay there and people just walked past them. Where's the justice in that? If only there was a way to identify these people who left them to die. They should be punished as well!

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

-Grace-..DamonCrazy..

KhotaSikaShreya

Viewbie

KhotaSikaShreya

BollyCurry Script Supervisor

Joined: 30 November 2010

Posts: 128005

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 3:22pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Grace-

some people blame the women for their unacceptable appearance and clothing sometimes it is the women's fault (im not saying it is, but it depends on the intention if she is dressing for attention) and even if she is doing so for attention is the man so vulnerable to lose control and commit such a crime? 

Why are women blamed all around the world? I live in Canada, and we're considered to be an advanced nation. Really? I don't think so. Even here, women are frowned upon when they wear liberal clothing like the men.I have a problem with this. Why are women blamed all around the world? I live in Canada, and we're considered to be an advanced nation. Really? I don't think so. Even here, women are frowned upon when they wear liberal clothing like the men.

And here I feel that women are not as safe as they should be. Every day I hear on the news of a girl being sexually assaulted at a university campus. University is supposed to be a safe place! A place to learn! And still such things happen! This is wrong!

-Grace-

IF-Rockerz

-Grace-

Joined: 06 June 2008

Posts: 8309

Posted: 12 January 2013 at 3:41pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by KS_Shreya

Originally posted by -Grace-

some people blame the women for their unacceptable appearance and clothing sometimes it is the women's fault (im not saying it is, but it depends on the intention if she is dressing for attention) and even if she is doing so for attention is the man so vulnerable to lose control and commit such a crime? 

Why are women blamed all around the world? I live in Canada, and we're considered to be an advanced nation. Really? I don't think so. Even here, women are frowned upon when they wear liberal clothing like the men.I have a problem with this. Why are women blamed all around the world? I live in Canada, and we're considered to be an advanced nation. Really? I don't think so. Even here, women are frowned upon when they wear liberal clothing like the men.

And here I feel that women are not as safe as they should be. Every day I hear on the news of a girl being sexually assaulted at a university campus. University is supposed to be a safe place! A place to learn! And still such things happen! This is wrong!

Im not blaming women in general or liberal at all but just saying that it all depends on the intention women or men (women actually dressing for attention now i dont know how much of that is true)

and i said even if they are dressing for attention its not a crime i think that is human nature to attract and get attracted but the rapists should have some control 

and i also live in Canada and i too feel women are not so safe anywhere. 
And i see your point too, usually women are the ones blamed


Edited by -Grace- - 12 January 2013 at 3:39pm

Post Reply New Post

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Topic Starter Replies Views Last Post
A good debate question

2 3 4 5 6

--arti-- 43 2434 18 March 2013 at 11:38am
By _Angie_
The Sex Debate

2 3 4

-Aarya- 24 1406 03 March 2013 at 10:43am
By peridot.
SEXUALITY debate: Why can't people live their life

2 3 4 5 6 7 ... 33 34

WhipCreamPantie 265 16746 28 January 2013 at 9:56pm
By nishabee
How would you deal with RAPE? Let's DEBATE

2 3 4

WhipCreamPantie 24 1641 26 December 2012 at 8:48am
By -bharti-
The Music Debate!

2 3 4

Heart 27 1571 31 August 2012 at 11:18am
By .DarkParadise..

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Debate Mansion Topic Index

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.