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New FF *A different Love Story* Pt11 Pg 23 (Page 12)

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tulipdaisy

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tulipdaisy

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:28pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by widdy

Well,you 3 girls are in the same league!Clap(Ash,Mansi and Vinnie)
Very good creative writing-keep going.Congratulations to all.Thumbs Up
I do hope the cv's of this show open their eyes wide to see how a story should be wriiten-3 different ways and all are interesting!Smile
Not the rubbish we have been subjected to for the last 5-6 months!Angry


Thanks Widdy & I agree with you Vinni & Mansi are doing a fabulous job. Hope Cvs too reform.

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ronshaan

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tulipdaisy

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tulipdaisy

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:29pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by octopie

Hi Arti ! Not at all boring to me, I think it's absolutely a great idea that you're putting some other things into the story and not just Sugvi. While their story's seed has already been planted and is growing, there are other situations/events happening and such things will also help understand and see the story better. By doing so, you're also giving their blooming relationship a context.
So, I'm happy, as a reader, to know about other parts of their lives... the factory especially since that's what brought Vickram here and is quite important to him. Through these other happenings, we see qualities of Vickram like just see here, how the manager admired and praised Vickram. seeing that Vickram cares about the villagers as they are facing poverty, that he could help them (and have faith in them) this way at least instead of getting workers from elsewhere and at the same time, he finds his father's dream important to fulfill although he does not have to do so, is it?
so keep it up, Arti ! it's fantastic Embarrassed I loved reading about their inner thoughts too !


Octopie thanks for your lovely comments... means a lot to me. You have summed it up perfectly.

tulipdaisy

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tulipdaisy

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:30pm | IP Logged
Komal
Sandy
Ron

Thanks a lot gus for your comments & appreciation. Means a lot to me.Hug

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tulipdaisy

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tulipdaisy

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:31pm | IP Logged
@Swathi
@Julie

Thanks a lot guys... yes its a slow & steady love story not a rushed one.

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K.swati885

tulipdaisy

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tulipdaisy

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Posted: 30 January 2013 at 8:55pm | IP Logged

Part  5  Second Meeting

 

Things were slowly settling down at the Haveli. Next evening Vikram decides to stroll out and explore the Village. Part of him wanted to see Sugni again but he would never accept it. He still felt bad that she had left without informing him and he had decided to confront her & ask her why she did so. He was in two minds whether to question her or not... In these 2 days he thought of her several times whenever he had time off work. Her face was always roaming in his mind. He thought he felt so becoz she had been very kind and helpful to him.

 

He had reached the river banks and began to admire the scenic beauty...or so he thought but in reality he was looking straight down at Sugni who was playing with some of the kids a hide & seek game. She had a breathtaking smile a kind of happiness, innocence which we see in a child. Vikram for a moment stood mesmerized looking at her. Then she slowly turned and looked at him. Vikram continued to look at her and started to move towards her but alas he kept a wrong step and skidded down the small slope next to the river.

 

Sugni  stood there in shock seeing him slip through the slope. She yelled "Thakur Malak" and ran in his direction.

 

Sugni rushes to the hill slope and yells out his name in desperation.

" Thakur malak... sir... sir... Thakur malak ... Omg where is he.

One Kid : Sugni didi I think he is gone

Sugni : Shut up chotu.. don't speak ill... Thakur malak? Thakur malak? Hey Sitamaa pls save him.

 

Just then she hears Vikram's voice : Sugni I am very much alive... stop worrying.

Sugni : Sir... where are you? I cant see you.

Vikram : That's becoz I am down below. Can you help me come up pls.

Sugni : Sir you ..you just wait there I am coming.

Vikram : For god sake sugni.. stop acting foolish... If you too come here how will we go up.

Sugni scratches her head & says : Sorry Sir I didn't think of it.

Chotu : Didi we need some rope or cloth so that we can throw it & he can come up with its help.

Sugni : Thats the best way but Where will we get a rope here...

 

She looks around for something which might be of help but what would she find in such a place. Finally with no other option she removes her dupatta and leans near the hill top & throws it down towards Vikram.

 

Sugni : Thakur malak pls hold this and try to come up.

Vikram immediately holds on to it and asks them to pull him up.

Sugni : Comeon boys pull it but be careful the cloth might tear off.

 

They all slowly pull Vikram and he comes out safely. They heave a sigh of relief when Vikram by mistake pulls the cloth and Sugni comes into his arms within a second. This time again they fall but luckily on the safe side of the river. Sugni falls first and Vikram tumbles on her. Both are shocked and slowly look at each other. Vikram stares into her deep blue eyes which seem as deep as an ocean to him. Sugni doesn't know what to do.. she feels her heart may come to her mouth.. Her heart beats so fast that she thinks chotu who was standing nearby may hear it. She closes her eyes as she fears looking in to those eyes and loosing herself in it. Just then Chotu calls out her name and Vikram Sugni come out of their embrace.

 

Chotu : Didi are you alright.

Sugni gets up and turns her back to Vikram. She feels akward as she is without her dupatta and covers her hand across her.

Vikram senses her uneasiness and looks around and finds the dupatta. He come and puts it across her shoulder and looks away. Sugni immediately adjusts her dupatta.

 

Sugni : Sir your clothes are completely dirty.

Vikram : I am fine.

Sugni : Sir and your hand is bleeding too.

She immediately holds his right hand in hers and cleans the wound with her dupatta. Vikram looks at her with a smile & warmth. Sugni realizes what she has been doing and slowly leaves his hand.

Sugni : Sir my house is nearby... I would request you to come and clean up & I will also bandage your hand.

Vikram : Its alright sugni... you have already done so much for me... and today you saved my life.

Sugni : Sir if you want to thank me then do so by coming to my house now.

 

Vikram didn't wanted to disappoint her... Infact he didn't wanted this evening to end... he wanted to spend more time with her... He kept asking himself why he is feeling so but he was not getting any answers. He finally gives in.

 

They walk for about 10 minutes and finally reach a small house in the middle of the village.

 

Sugni : Sir this is my house...Its very small I hope you wont feel embarrassed to come here.

Vikram thinks to say your house maybe small but your heart is big but stops & says : I don't judge people by their house Sugni but by their nature.

 

Sugni doesn't know what to say & calls out her mother.

Gulabia comes out & finds Sugni with a man.

Gulabia : Sugni who is this Thakur?

Sugni : Maa he is Thakur Vikram Singh.

Gulabia bows to him when Vikram says : Pls madam you are elder to me.

Gulabia : But sir you are Thakur Malak.

Vikram : I don't believe in these things that seeing a Thakur you all should bow down.

 

Sugni looks at him in admiration while Gulabia is shocked to hear him.

Sugni : Maa Sir has hurt his hand can you pls bring some potion which we use at home.

Gulabia : That's fine but where is our manners talking to a guest at the door. Pls come inside sir.

 

Vikram enters the house. Though it was a small house they had kept it modest & clean.

Vikram : Sugni its only the 2 of you staying here?

Sugni : No Sir my 2 uncles & aunts also stay but right now they have gone to next village for a marriage.

Vikram nods & Gulabia comes with potion & Tea.

Sugni sits near him and applies medicine and ties a piece of cloth around him.

Vikram : Gulabiaji  had it not been for your daughter today I would not have been alive.

Gulabia looks at both of them in shock while Vikram explains how he fell off the hill top & sugni saved him.

Gulabia : Thanks to Sitamaa that you are safe.

Sugni : Maa we should be thankful to Thakur malak becoz 2 days ago he saved me from that evil Thakur DV.

Gulabia : Yes Sir Sugni told me all about it and I am grateful to you.

Vikram gets up & says : Gulabiaji enough of this thanking each other I have to take leave now as I have a meeting early morning but it was nice meeting you & I must say you have given very good sanskaar to your daughter.

Gulabia : It was our pleasure meeting you Sir.

 Vikram comes out of the house followed by Sugni

Vikram : Sugni if you donot mind my asking does your mother or you go for work?

Sugni : Sir my mother works as a cook in 3 Thakur's houses. I have just completed my BCom so I am looking for a job. I... I... cant see my maa working so hard.

Vikram : What about your 2 uncles.

Sugni : Thats a long story sir...

Vikram : Thats fine I will take your leave now...

Vikram waits for her to say something but she keeps quite.

Sugi leaves him till the main gate and gives him direction to go to his haveli. She stands watching him go until he is out of sight.



Edited by ash_arti - 30 January 2013 at 9:42pm

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octopieSandy66komal07JulieDrozieVinnie79ronshaan

Vinnie79

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Vinnie79

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Posted: 31 January 2013 at 4:20am | IP Logged
Amazing Chapter Arthi,   funny, romantic and light. Its nice to see the  attraction between the two of them  growing. The story is moving along nicely, and I  can't wait for part 6. I  like the fact Sugni is educated.  .  Keep going ...great Job! 

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tulipdaisyronshaan

Rakhi1608

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Rakhi1608

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Posted: 31 January 2013 at 4:43am | IP Logged
Arti, great  work, very entertaing, keep going, we appreciate a lot.

I wish  tum logo se(  you, Mansi,Vinnie)  aadha bhi dimag Psh ke writers ke pass hota to aaj Psh  with all these great actors no. 1 hota (trp me)

thanks.

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rozie

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rozie

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Posted: 31 January 2013 at 8:22am | IP Logged
Lovely update Aarathi, i loved today's epi, the way TVS and sugni bonded and are realising thier attraction for each other, loved it.
 
 

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