Forever 21 GEMs (Invites Only) - Page 24

I owe you some answers. Probably for the weekend, when I have time.

I have no words after the last two post, I just have tears in my eyes.
We are here to support each other, to learn something new, to share our experience,
this is not chat! Shri, thank you for bringing us here! Edited by zorica - 11 years ago

Shri and Bhakthi reading your posts i got emotional and i have tears in my eyes.I am not good at words and consoling. Good wishes for a brighter future to Bhakthi and u too shri😊 Edited by vaani21 - 11 years ago

Bhakti, SD- Reading your posts, for the first time, i wished so much that we were not online chat friends. I wish I could hug you both...an emoticon is just not enough, but it will have to do for now.🤗

Thanks, everyone, for your so kind replies.  I too feel fortune was so kind to bring us all together in this way. I always look forward to coming here to read everyone's thoughts.  No wonder the ladies here analyse the show from such deep angles, as well.  Complicated lives create compassion for others - I think that is why everyone writes such deep, thoughtful analysis and does not skate over the obvious surfaces.  They are treating the characters' lives as complex and multi-faceted, just as they would consider the complicated lives of those around them. 

Originally posted by: Soundarya22

Bhakti, SD- Reading your posts, for the first time, i wished so much that we were not online chat friends. I wish I could hug you both...an emoticon is just not enough, but it will have to do for now.🤗

Want to write so much more, will try over the weekend. 

all I can say is..I never thought a hindi serial, would bring so many like minded, wonderful, brave people together, I am so happy to have met all of you. 

To both of you, one of my favourite quotes:

"Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor Frankl

@ALL - SBB interview showed that they were shooting for "Bindiya Chamkegi" song at 1 AM. Wow! the cast and crew are giving their all and it was really nice to see DD acknowledge the fact that despite being too late she is doing this for her fans who will like it for sure. VD probably was too tired and irritated with the reporter who asked how he is liking it and he responded to her question with a question of his own asking her if she is happy interviewing him at 1 AM. I thought that was a bit rude and top of that when she asked him about his dance steps he said that the choreographer knows his dancing abilities and kept the steps accordingly. Just because he is RK does not mean that he will be like Michael Jackson. I was like man he is snappy and curt in his responses.

Originally posted by: bhakti2

How is it that in one culture (U.S., for example), the victim is seen as the wronged party and is given support accordingly, where as in another (many others, I fear), she is shamed and is responsible for the loss of honour for her whole family?

I am asking the question seriously and not rhetorically. It must be an anthropological matter, hai na, that shame and honour is in some settings symbolised by the purity and control of the woman, but actually resides in the hands of the men.  In this situation is it not so that one man (or an army of men, sometimes, as is happening in Mali, Somalia, etc.) will rape a woman not to destroy her per se, but to destroy the man whose honour she represents?  In this case scenario, it is no wonder she has no value - she is just a symbol, a territory over which one or another man has control. I mean to say, the rape of a woman by one man emasculates the other to whom she is attached by rishta.

So why does this take place in one cultural setting but not the other? And was this difference always present or was the West once more like the East, or vice versa?  Is it a matter of primate behaviour?  That is what I thought when a neighbour explained to me the plot of the current track of Punar Vivaah, in which a woman's previous husband tries to force the abortion of her current husband's unborn child.  It is a disgusting track, but also quite primate-like - I do remember reading about some simians who will take over a group of rivals, kill the males and the babies, and reimpregnate the females.  Is this brutal sort of biology present also in our primitive brain areas?  

Thank god, though, we do have free will and can think ethically.  Now if only more people will choose to do so.

Ya'll I just wanted to say: Thank for posting such beautiful, insightful posts. It's amazing to write/communicate with all of you. 

Hello, everyone!  Here I am quoting Shri without her permission so Shri, I am kaan-pakkring to you even once more, but I thought this was such a wonderful passage you wrote in the ED, I wished everyone could see.  I read it over many times, because I have thought and thought about this subject in life - the processing of loss. the acceptance of loss - how it comes up again and again in great literature and art and, of course, in religion. How loss is at the core of what it is to be human - just as we try foolishly also to avoid pain, as if such a thing were possible.  As RK numbs his with whiskey, so do we all sometimes stray from the path of good sense and seek to numb pain which we are meant to feel fully and to grow from.  Khair - I just thought the way you expressed was 👏 - a beautiful life lesson and so compassionately delivered.Edited by bhakti2 - 11 years ago

Originally posted by: apolloartemis

Hi Bhakti! 

I don't think its a East/West thing per say. Even here in the U.S, there are places/people who blame the victim for the rape (for example- the clothes the woman was wearing, if she was drinking etc). It's a lot more prevalent in India, I think, because the general attitude towards women is that they are meant to be standards that gauge the honor of their menfolk. As a result, when they fall from that standard, they shame their family and not themselves. It's a different way of thinking, but one you can find in Eastern Europe a lot as well. In fact, in Bosnia, during the war, rape was used as a tool of warfare, to shame the men of the culture in question. Those people did not think of the huge effect it would have on the women...

It is just another burden we bear as women in this world. But all it does is make me more determined that if I have a daughter, she'll come into a world where her being a girl is not a disadvantage, but something she can take pride in. It's a world, we should all, in some small way, try to work towards.