I don't think it's that simple. The most important thing I got from that conversation is exactly that Anandi is worrying about what you just said. Her concern isn't as much for herself as it is for Shiv and what she thinks she won't be able to give him, and I think that speaks volumes about what she feels subconsciously, even though she doesn't see it yet.
You have to remember she blamed Shiv for agreeing to marry her, when she didn't know he loved her. She was going to go through with the marriage then too, because of her mother's promise, and because she thought this is what everyone wanted, including Shiv. Now she knows he loves her, and that makes it even more of a situation where she's going through with it for everyone's happiness, but now it includes his, and hers, although she doesn't fully realize that. She has a really ridiculous concept of love, like we heard in her phone conversation with Ashima, but I don't think she's ever truly felt it. At least not the kind of love that happens between two really compatible people who understand each other and are meant for each other. Whatever was between her and Jagdish was forced by the circumstances, and was 'swabahvik' attachment, and she ascribed her own ideas of love as once in a lifetime to it. But she doesn't know what love is.
Also, all this confusion is mixed with the sadness any woman feels on leaving her home before marriage. It's her attachment to her past and childhood speaking, not mature love for Jagdish, not even the Jagdish of five years ago. That flashback occurred as part and parcel of her memories of her past. I don't think she would forget that that Jagdish of five years ago grew up to cheat on her, call her backward and disrespect her mother's memory at her funeral. But she's going into something unknown, and that's scary for anyone. And she's doing it anyway, because she knows it's what her mother wanted and also what Shiv wants. I'd hardly call that selfish. These doubts about her own feelings have more to do with the heat of emotions she was feeling at the prospect of leaving, and were coming from her looking back. When she looks forward, it should be fine.
I think the fact that it's taking her so long to realize is a good thing, because when the realization does come, it will be profound and romantic and grand and beautiful. Or at least, that's how it should be, if the CVs have any sense.