Joined: 06 September 2012
Nidhi leaned over sink and looked at her reflection in mirror, she took deep breath as wave of nausea took over her '.It's been the same , last couple of months 'all morning moping around and looking at how her life is falling apart. How she is breaking into pieces, lately all her actions seemed too absurd to contemplate, it's as if she is dying from inside, it's a profound feeling of loss, an emptiness which never fills her whole again '
If anyone's life can change overnight, if anyone's life can get destroyed in just seconds...It's hers! Her life was perfect, why not? When she had such loving baba...who always made sure his little girl is happy, who was more like friend to her than father..who danced with her in her happiness and who cheered her in her sadness '..who understood her above everything ,,without telling single word always understood...what his little girl want? She still remembers how her friends used to admire her father, for being the person he was'.Kind and understanding .never judging anyone, always accepting one person as he is 'She still remember how he used to carry her over his back when she was little kid...taking her out every evening to watch sunset 'he was one person who always lived every moment of his life 'living to fullest '.until he died 'so suddenly and left her so abruptly!
Leaving her in middle of absurd reality which is hard to digest, every morning she wake up and forget just for a second 'that it happened , that her baba died ..truly and really '.but when she open her eyes, the reality always buried her like a landslide of sad and sharp rocks ..She feels so heavy at heart with all those memories lurking around 'the days after her baba's death are so dull and feeble to her eyes...she don't remember much of her returning back home after looking at her baba's dead face in morgue nor the days followed ..her dadi bua tried to console her , cheer her 'but all Nidhi felt as if she is lost in constant deep hole of ache which keep throbbing from inside .
She wished she can able to put into words how she feels from inside but No...She found it hard to cry or even console her heart. Apart from sobbing silently couple of minutes sitting on her bed the night when her baba was cremated, she barely cried '.she found it too exhausting even to cry over something which she can't change and as days passed she understood, it's not only her baba's death which is going to make her life miserable but also their financial situation 'she believed they were well off, if not much 'she believed her baba's business is making good profit but she was pulled out to reality when her Baba's business partner came to her informing about the loss which they faced from past couple of months '.even though he took up the responsibility of paying back all the debt by himself but Nidhi understood they are left with nothing in hand but only a home to stay !
That night, sitting in her bed 'she took out her graduation marks sheet and tried to think of way to make their life better, hers and dadi bua's'..Next day morning when Nidhi informed Db about her decision to go to Mumbai on job search 'Db was horrified without giving second chance she declined it and asked Nidhi to search a job in lucknow itself but even after lurking for days under scorching day light when she did not found single job ,DB finally allowed her to go to Mumbai'..When she came to Mumbai , she thought one or other way , she will find a job but lately due to recession and her lack of experience , she found it pretty hard to get hold of decent job and in the end , to handle her expenses she ended up working in this coffee shop even though the pay is not good but still she carried on to work thinking that once she get full time job she will quit but the more she tried the more distant it looked to get hold of job'.She wondered how miserable a life can get and how much she has to struggle to build her life back '.or will she ever be able to ? She wondered, deep in thoughts...
She was jolted out of her thoughts when she heard soft knock on door '..She opened her eyes and moved towards door to find Manya standing '" Nidhi , you still here '.you have interview rite in an hour ?"
Nidhi shrugged her shoulder " No , I am not going '..I know I am not going to get it ! "
" how can you tell without trying 'now stop all this , you do one thing ..take one last order from table #4 and after that you can go 'and don't worry , I will cover up for you '."
Nidhi smiled as manya dragged her outside.
When she stepped out Nidhi breathed in as deep familiar scent of African coffee beans and baked cookies reached her nostrils '.it soothed her , she felt at home in this caf where she found some good friends like Manya , after taking care of order , nidhi took her things and got ready to leave ..just then Manya came to her holding cup of hot chocolate " here have this and I packed some sandwich for you '.I know you did not had breakfast"
Nidhi shook her head " you don't have to do that 'you know I don't eat breakfast, I prefer brunch '."
" yeh I know , Brunch at 5 in the evening ..Nidhi , you should eat properly , look at you all skinny 'put on some flesh girl "
Nidhi smiled ..." ok , I will eat it on my way '.and thanks for this " and she gulped down her hot chocolate in one go '.
" Do well in your interview ..And call me with good news '"
Nidhi smiled and ran outside in hurry '.
"Everybody, please fill out these forms, I want these to be done within 5 minute '."Nidhi looked up to find a girl in her late twenties coming to her with a piece of paper 'Nidhi clutched that piece of paper in her hand looking around confused, she was shaken out of her thoughts when that girl nudged her "You, Hurry up'.Fill this up and give me soon ".Nidhi nodded her head and dug her hand deep in her bag to search for a pen 'she searched on and on but she did not found one'desperately she looked at those who are sitting next to her 'busily filling the form given to them , she tried to ask them but to her bad luck ..They shooed her away telling they will give once they are done'She wondered whether she should wait or ask someone else '
She stood up as she saw one girl sitting behind reception busily talking to someone, May be her boy friend! ..Nidhi stood there for a while waiting for that girl to acknowledge her presence, but when she dint...nidhi sighed! And extended her hand to knock on desk to get her attention "excuse me '.can you give me pen ...I'I think I lost it on my way here?"Girl sitting behind reception desk glared at her, may be because for disturbing when she was having pleasant conversation with god knows who !...She looked at nidhi with total dislike " Sorry , I don't have one '"
Nidhi "but it's there in your hand '.I just want it to fill these forms 'just for 2 minute "
That girl looked at nidhi with total resentment 'nidhi did not understood what she asked that this girl is acting like this " Sorry , I am using this 'and you came here to give interview and I don't understand how one person can come to give one so unprepared !..."
Nidhi: I just need help
That girl snorted "help yourself'Please "
Nidhi closed her eyes to control her rage which is rising deep within her; she wondered why people behave so mean sometime, she looked around to find everyone almost done 'Not sure what to do, she ran outside to search for stationery .And it was after 10 minutes she spotted stationery, after purchasing a pen she came back in hurry and filled the form 'Not sure how long but she waited for hours outside. Beyond the queues, the large screen listed the jobs in multitude of languages, invariably...They were short paid, and short ending jobs 'People sat with their headphones on staring at computer screen with empty faces , forcing fake smile talking to someone they don't even know'.guiding them , helping them to choose the products which they are selling. It looked strange to her, those fake smiles; those energetic talks, looked bizarre to her '.They all look exhausted just like her, suddenly an overpowering grief took over her, an endless hopelessness '..Even before she could get hold situation, she was asked to get inside to give her interview '.
"So MS Nidhi verma '.Tell me about yourself "
She stared at him blankly " hmm .. '."
"no need to be nervous , I believe this is your job '!
" Yes '.."
What were you doing before? "any experience '.because I can see you finished your graduation 5 years back ..?"
" No , I was helping my father in his business '..but it did not worked out other than that I don't have any other experience "
" oh I see 'Let me come straight to the point , I don't want to build up your hope too much 'We already selected 2 candidates who have good experience in this field and we will let you know if we find anything suitable for your profile but right ..I am sorry , we don't have anything for you! "
Nidhi forced a smile and came outside dejected but then again she consoled her at least she have a job , even though small one , she can survive in this city '.thinking all this she came out side as gush of cold wind swept through her sending a chill through her bone ...Gripped with bitter cold whole city stood illuminating in sparkling lights ,she rubbed her hand in desperate attempt to warm her cold fingers and enveloped her body with her bare hands ..just then she heard someone calling out her name , she turned and instantly a big smile leaped on her face " Rohan '.."
He came and hugged her '" is this how you welcome your friends ? ..Haan Nidhi , that's bad '!"
"when you came back from kerala '..you were supposed to come tomorrow "
" I came early , I was missing you 'you see "
" ohh stop lying , tell me what you bought for me ?"
" guess what '.banana wafers fried in pure ghee '.I know you and your craving for chips , I still remember when we were kids how dadi bua used to use this to make you work '."
Nidhi chuckled " And you remember how baba used to make fun of my craving for chips '"
Rohan smiled and looked at her " so how was it 'your interview?"
Nidhi gave him faint smile " they don't have vacancy right now , I should have listened to baba rohan ..I wasted so many years simply sitting at home ..I should have done something useful after my grad "
" That's ok 'nothing is lost now , you will get good job 'Nidhi , now how about I treat you with ice-cream ..Our favorite choco caramel ?"
Nidhi face lit up and suddenly she shook her head .." No rohan'.some other time "
Before she could finish her sentence, rohan dragged her to eat ice cream '.." I don't know what to do '..I mean I wish I find a job soon '.even though DB is not saying anything but I can see we are on edge .."
" I have a solution for you 'get married "
Nidhi snorted " you seriously think , getting married will solve my problem , what I will do with DB 'I cannot leave her alone '"
R0han smiled " I asked you to marry me! '.I have good job , you don't have to worry about anything at all and then you and DB both can stay with me ,.."
Nidhi chuckled "Don't even dream of such things '"
"Why not, we are good friends, I know you from childhood days 'I am serious ...well marriage reminded me something ...guess what?"
" What ?"
" Vishal is getting married '..The guy who was madly in love with you in college days 'you remember him don't you? ..he used to come behind you like love sick puppy '"
Nidhi smiled "yes I remember ..."
" you amaze me Nidhi ''you are 26 but I haven't even seen you showing least interest towards anyone '..That's really strange !"
" what is strange in that '..?"
" ohh common , by the time one turn 26 at least dozen time a person fall in love '.."
Nidhi snorted" that is applicable for you, not me '!"
"Tell me honestly, dint you ever fell in love 'fell for anyone '.?"
This simple question stirred something deep in her , a memory which she forgotten forcefully '.a face which still haunt her in her dreams came rushing to her . Even before she could stop..She blurted out '." There was one '.."
Rohan looked up " tell me about it '?"
Nidhi shrugged her shoulder '" Nothing 'He had deep eyes and most a beautiful smile"
Rohan stopped eating and looked at her "Who?"
Nidhi shrugged her shoulder "it does not matter '..It's so long back!"
"who is it and where he is now ?"
Nidhi shook her head ..." not sure '."
"Is he in same city ?"
" No sure "
" where he stay '.?"
" not sure '"
" Jeez Nidhi 'do you at least know is he alive or he is dead ?"
Nidhi glared at him "people don't die in their 30's '..he is alive , I know 'he living his life happily .."
" So he is in his 30's interesting !...do you know his name atleast ..ohh please don't tell me , you don't even know his name '"
" of course I know his name '."
" what is it '?"
She took deep breath and murmured softly and slowly "Ashuthosh 'Ashuthosh Mathur "
Her voice deep with emotions and gravely audible , she wondered how long it's been since she uttered his name '.5 yrs ,6 yrs 'with just whispering his name a small smile crept on her face invariably she looked out in darkness as his memories came to her ...like long lost dream , his image took shape in her mind and slowly she murmured his name again and again " Ashuthosh 'Ahsuthosh mathur "
Let me know if you want me to continue and please do comment and hit like
Joined: 18 January 2012
Yes please...so Nidhi is not a Doctor???
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Joined: 06 September 2012
Yes please...so Nidhi is not a Doctor???
Joined: 06 September 2012
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