Posted: 28 November 2012 at 1:11am | IP Logged
Originally posted by yessehm
Well then, I think, I would fall into yr mums generation or there abouts. So we will have a difference of opinion as in yr opinion I am from a different time, out dated and totally without a clue as to whats right for a hild of yr ge even though I am a mother, highly educated and have been working as a doctor and surgeon since you were born
Hey, hey, hey, calm down. You are putting words in my mouth now. I never said that. Let me make my stand clear to you.
I respect people based on their behavior and actions. A good person is a good person, it does not matter whether he is 70 or 17. Same goes for a bad person, he is a bad person, 70 or 17. If a terrorist teaches his child to go kill, shouldn't the child question? It is an extreme example, but just for putting a point that parents are not devoid of making mistakes.
As to parents, yes I love and respect them. But respect doesn't mean obeying orders without question. That's being a slave. In my opinion, parents are like guides. They can't be with their kids all the time for whole life, so they need to do the upbringing in such a way that kid can make decisions himself. If you don't give him a chance, how would he ever learn? You can't expect to spoon feed and then just ask him one day to behave as an adult. You need to make the transition smooth.
So, yes I respect my parents, what they have done for me. But kids need respect too. Respect is a two way street. Kids are also people and need to know that their opinion matters to their parents. It's natural to want to make your parents happy. I may be angry with my parents, but still would want that they appreciate my work. A parent's encouraging word matters the most to kid. No materialistic thing can match the happiness I fell when i see my parents smile due to something I did.
But, people are different. Opinions differ. We all have a mind to think and different people may have different ideas. So, I think we should respect each other's opinion. After all, it's kid's life and if he wants to do something, he should have a right to it. Parents should advice, but the final decision should be of kids. They should talk and reach a conclusion where both parties can be satisfied. But always telling kids not to talk back, or your decision is not up for discussion, just shows your supremacy not love. Love never means dominance. It hurts the child, makes him feel as if his opinion is not worth anything. And everybody wants appreciation, so kids turn to others so that they may feel like they matter. That is more damaging.
So, if you are beginning every discussion with the bias that you are right, what's the point of discussion? Discussion makes sense only if both views are considered neutrally and then one is chosen. Otherwise you will be committing the fallacy of Argument From Authority.
As to you, I don't think I have disrespected you. Being from a different time is not a negative statement from me, I apologize if I offended you. The next generation will also be of a different time. I just meant that your thoughts may be different. But similarly, I am also different. And difference is not bad, if everyone thought the same, world would be pretty bland place. It just means that our opinions could clash, and we should respect each other's opinions. And this doesn't only happen with different generations. my thoughts sometimes differs from my friends, and I am sure your colleagues would also be somehow different.
And as to education, it's good that you are a doctor. But just because somebody is a kid, you can't just dismiss him. if I write something and give it to Dr. Kalam, would it become automatically right coming from his mouth, given that he is a big personality and ex-president? The content will be same, what a 18 year old kid was speaking. No. It will remain the same. Because, ideas and opinions can be right or wrong, the person speaking it doesn't figure in it.
Hope, now you can clearly see where I am coming from.