IF YOU NEED ENGLISH TRANSLATIONS,
PLEASE SEE TRANSLATED VERSION ON PAGE 11
It was the
day after diwaali and the writers of DABH came to work. They were to write the
screenplay for the next DABH episode.
Writer
1: Arey yaar! Last night full mazaa kiya! Party, khaana-peena,
patakhe, with all my friends and family! Lekin soney mey der ho gayi! π Ab itni subah,
dimaag hi nahi chal raha! π₯±
Writer
2: Sachchi yaar! Mera bhi haal kuch aisa hi hai! π₯± Ab ye DABH episode
kaise write karey? π
The writers
started to think ...
Writer
3: IDEA! Kyon na ek remix
episode write kardey? Puraaney dialogues daal dete hai! Waise bhi, aaj kal sab
yehi kar rahein hai. Just recently, Himesh ne apne puraaney songs leykar, ek
naya song banaya. Apparently, usey buhut "yaad yaad yaad" tadparahi
thi! ... Like reverse amnesia, sirf past songs hi dimaag mey aa rahe the! π
So with
this, the writers wrote out the DABH screenplay, using some bollywood dialogues
and song lyrics from the past. Here's what they came up with:
Scene:
Mohit stumbles in through the front door of the Rathi Mansion. His face
bruised, black eye, and he is all dazed
and confused π. Suraj and Baabasa
notice him and rush towards him with concern and worry.
Suraj: Mohit! Yeh kya hua
tujhe? π²
Baabasa: haan Mohit! π² "Yehhh kya
hua? ... Kaise hua? ... Kab hua? ... Kyon hua?" ()
Mohit
(looking up at Baabasa with confusion): aap kaun hai? π
Baabasa:
"Rishte mein
toh hum tumhare baap lagte hain! ... Naam hai Baabasa!"
Suraj: tu theek to hai na Mohit?!
"Kuch to bata ... arey kuch to bata!" ... Kuch to sign de ke tu theek
hai!
Mohit:
Sign?! "Jao
pehle uska sign ley ke aao jisne mere haath pe ye likh diya!" ...
Mohit
shows his arm, on which was written: "meri behen chudail hai!"
Everyone: π²
Suraj:
Yeh kisne likha?
Mohit:
Superman ne! Usne apne laal dupatte se meri buhut dhulai ki! π
Bhabho
and Sandhya enter the scene.
Bhabho: Mohit! π² Hai mhara JAM ji!
Yeh sab kisne kiya?! π‘
Mohit: Superman ... aur uski Rockerz
and Dazzlerz waali gang ne! π
Bhabho: KYA?! ... (camera
zooms in on Bhabho) ... "ek ek ko chun chun ke maroongi ... chun
chun ke maroongi!" π‘
Mohit
(looking at Sandhya, still wobbly and confused): aap kaun hai? π
Sandhya:
"Sandhya
Suraj Rathi ... poora naam! ... Baap ka naam ...
Arvind Kothari! ... Maa ka naam ... Kanchan Kothari! Bhai ka ..."
Bhabho: "Khamoshhh!" Ab kya poore
khandaan ka naam batayegi?! π‘
As
usual, Daisaa, having smelt the opportunity to embarrass Bhabho, comes over to
the Rathi Mansion ... ofcourse with her pooja ki thaali π
Daisaa: Ae Santoos! Main yeh kya
sunrahi hoon? Thaara chora maar khake aaya?! π
Bhabho: Daisaa ... "Jinke ghar
sheeshe ke hote hain, woh doosron ke gharron par patthar nahi pheka
karte!"
Daisaa: woh sab chod Santoos. π€ Bas yeh bataa ki
aagey ka plan kya hai?
Bhabho: Main "Superman ka
khoon peejaongi!" π‘
Daisaa: Accha?! π² "Superman ka
intezaar to gyaara mulkon ki police kar rahi hai (haan, haan ... 12th country
se bhi baat chal rahi hai)! Lekin Superman ko pakadna mushkil hi nahi, ... namumkin
hai!' π³
Bhabho: Daisaa ... "Zindagi mein
teen cheez kabhi underestimate nahi karna, ... I, me and myself!'
Daisaa: Arey wah! "Bahut jaan
baakhi hai thaare haathon mein" π²
Bhabho:
Daisaa ...
"Jab yeh dhaai kilo ka haath kisipe padta hain, toh aadmi uthta nahi, ...
uth jaata hai!!"
Daisaa: Par Santoos,
"Superman ke paas Ak-47 hai, M-6 rifle hai, JAMi hai!! Tumhare paas kya hai? Kyaa hai
tumhare paas?!" π
Camera
shot of Bhabho π³ ... then
Daisaa π³ ... then
Bhabho π³ ... then
Daisaa π³ ... then
the guy eating banana π² ... then
Daisaa's eyes ... then Bhabho's eyes ...
Bhabho: ..."Mere paas ... IPS beendni Hai!!!"
Everyone: π²
Bhabho: "Chal Beendni! ...
Aaj teri Bhabho ki izzat ka sawaal hai"!!
Sandhya
(raises her hand to salute): "Yes boss!" π
In
excitement, she accidentally hits Suraj who is standing behind her
Sandhya: oh! Sorry Suraj ji! "Galti se
mistake ho gaya!" π³
Suraj: "Koi baat nahi Senorita! π ...
Bade bade deshon main aisi chhoti chhoti baatein hoti rehti hai"
Sandhya
starts to walk, to join Bhabho, but Suraj stops her
Suraj
(whispering to Sandhya): Sandhya ji, ye aap kya kar rahi hai? Bhabho ko rokiye!
"Kanoon ke haath bahut lambe hote hai!" ... "When Superman die,
police coming. Police coming, Bhabho going jail. In jail, Bhabho chakki peesing
and peesing and peesing ... "
Sandhya:
Accha accha Suraj
ji! Main samaj gayee. ... Bhabho! Mujhe yeh theek nahi lag raha hai π². "Najdiki
fayda dekhne se pehle, door ka nuksaan sochna chahiye" !(Background music:
govinda govinda govinda govinda GOvindaaa!)
Bhabho:
Beendni ...
"Ek baar jo maine commitment kardi, ... us ke baad toh mein khud ki bhi
nahi sunti!!" (π)
Daisaa
(looking to add fuel to fire): Arey haan Santoos! Main to bataana hi bhool gayi. Abhi
abhi mandir se aatey waqt maine Superman ko road par dekha. Woh 'Rathi parivaar
murdabaad' key naarey laga rahi thi! π
Bhabho: KYA?!! π‘ "Mhara
parivaar Zindabaad tha ... Zindabaad hai ... aur Zindabaad rahega!! ... Rathi
parivaar Zindabaad!!!" π‘
With
that, Bhabho turns around and grabs the water pump in the aangan ... and rips
it out of the ground (full on "Gadar" style!) !! ... Everyone is shocked π² ... background
music is loud ... Episode ends with a still shot of Bhabho holding the hand
pump and anger on her face! π²
--
Me
(after watching the episode): Haila! Bhabho ne hand pump ukhaad diya?! π²
PART 1 OF EPISODE 2 by UMDU ji:
Scene: Sandhya is out on the street looking for our superman
Sandhya : Superman agar ma ka doodh piya hai to saamne aa warna patli gali se nikal ja.
Superman: Suraj se shaadi kya ho gayi tum to beheno ke beech ka rishta hi bhool gayi. Have you forgotten I am your sister.π²
Sandhya : Yeh sister wister mujhe samaj main nahi aata. Mujhe is duniya main sirf aur sirf Bhabo dikhaye dete hain. Unhone kaha parivar ki laaj rakhne ke liye tum he pakdna zaroori hai to zaroori hai. Tum khud surrender karte ho ya do haath doon.
Ami: Swami yeh main kya sun rahi hoon police aap ko pakad kar le ja rahi hai
Superman: Bhagyawan tum chinta mat karo jab behen ne hi saath chodh diya to kissi se ab kya kehna. Chaliye inspector Sandhyaji.
Sandhya Bhabo ke saamne Superman ko lati hai
Bhabo :To tu hai Superman aur ye teri biwi. Kyon ri Ami teri saas ne ghoonghat dalna nahi sikhaya. Yeh sab humare yahaan nahi chalega. (Ami boiling inside.)
COMMERCIAL BREAK ...
PART 2 OF EPISODE 2 by farhana:
Ami: Woh kya hain ki Bhabo ''Ghoonghat ke aar se Superman'ka deedar adhoora lagta hain''
That's why I don't like pallu!
Bhabo: π² Hey mhara...(Ami interrupts)
Ami: Bhabo, Ram'ji ko itna tang mat karo...You know Aap jo yeh ghoonghat dalti hain it's injurious to your health. I mean apki mundo ka taapmaan aise hi high rehte hain, aur phir yeh pallu is adding more heat to it!π Aap bimar pad jaogi aur dekhogi one day khud hi Ram'ji ke paas pahuch gayi!π
Bhabo: π² Waisa kya...Nahi nahi...I don't want to die before seeing my pota/poti! Le, hata diya pallu!
Ami: Yeh hui na baat...Bhabo aapko thoda excersize bhi karna chahiye...Meri patidev Superman, show Bhabo how to do it ( Samah showing some MJ movesπ)
Bhabo: Yeh bhi karna padega!!!π² Okay anything for pota/poti from SurYa!π
...Ami continues giving special advices to Bhabo and Bhabo keeps following blindly...
And you want to see the final outcome! This new and improved Bhabo!π
Moral of the story: Zindagi mein teen cheez kabhi underestimate nahi karna, ... Ami, Superman and their jodi!π
Dekha na kaise Bhabo se revenge le liya!π
HAPPY
WEEKEND EVERYONE! π