Posted: 16 November 2012 at 10:13pm | IP Logged
Sorry to interject but maybe your niece saw the divorce coming and did not want to bring kids into the picture complicating things further. If one is already going through an unhappy marriage, bringing kids into the picture is not such a good idea. I personally have a different view. I think kids actually are a good buffer and make parents think twice before uttering the D word. And Umaji, thanks for writing you POV on Sooraj. I don't have to write one now :-) I started putting down thoughts for a new thread "Sooraj is an idealist who thinks with his heart and not with his mind" but I am abandoning that one now. I think we all know that the strings are in the CVs hands. We are all trying to read too much into these characters. In the end all of us want SurYa moments. I for one sure do. Sorry I blabber a lot and never even introduced myself properly. Because of the nature of the work I do, I can't. But in short: I met my husband and married him here in the US. One month after marriage, I started my grad school, had my daughter in 2nd yr of grad school, and took 7 yrs to finish my Ph.D. Yes, I did dedicate my dissertation to my husband. We have a daughter, a son, and a dog. So that was some tough thing to do but certainly doable. If I can, anyone can !! Is my husband a Sooraj? Hell NO. Am I a Sandhya? Hell NO. We are as perfect or as imperfect humans can be. If I have a magic wand, I'd use it in a heartbeat to convert my husband into a Sooraj :-)
Wow ,a similar history as mine. I have already in the bati thread talked about the invaluable contribution of my husband to my academic life in particular. It feels great to know you also have a supportive husband. Regarding my cousin while she is sweet she has openly admitted she does not want to expand her family. She says she wants to wait for another 3 yrs for a promotion due. She will be into menopause than. Her husband is one of the finest boys I have met. We know the family very well. He has waited patiently for so many yrs but now has run out of patience. My cousin openly admits it is her fault but does not want to save her marriage. We have even held a family panchayat for her but she is adamant. I do not think there is any other reason for the D. My aunt is openly supportive of her son in law much to the annoyance of her daughter. Infact about 2 yrs back I read an article in India Today that it has become a problem with many IT couples in Bangalore as many of them are growing older but professional commitments prevent them from expanding the family. My cousin's case was just an example. Nice to know you also found a Suraj for yourself like me.
Edited by UMDU - 16 November 2012 at 10:22pm