Posted: 10 November 2012 at 2:55pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Chandramukhi-
@bold: That's exactly the issue here and the statement itself isn't something that is said casually as a compliment. It goes way beyond that. A statement like this has been imposed on women if they were to stand out or raise their voice. Objection has been raised not because we do not like anyone being modest, the objection has been raised when such statement are used to set boundaries for people who like to break the bondage and come out of the typical perception of the society. Use of such statements and perception of the society is one of the reasons why girls get the worse end of it when they try to speak up or be different.
And Roshan, the context in which Siddhu used the statement is anything but a compliment. From a guys POV, you are allowed to see it as a compliment or something you look for in girls. But as a girl, I would dislike use of such statements especially if used in situation like Sapna. No one should criticize me for being loud or use of foul language because I am a girl. Criticism should be for wrong actions but it shouldn't be because I belong to a different gender.
P.S: Grace and modesty is something I look for in guys as well.
Well, it was obvious that Sidhu was talking from a social standpoint. So what's wrong with that? Yes, I do agree that the virtues of grace and modesty apply to men equally, as I would myself detest any male who would come across as clamorous and obnoxious in their physical approach. However, since Sidhu was put on a pedestal by none other Sapna herself, he dared to have the effrontery to say that out loud. Anyway, I don't want to deviate from the topic here. What I feel is, she was called out on by Sidhu, keeping in mind her constant uncivil tantrums that she had been throwing around. I mean, come on, she's had a tiff with almost everyone in the house. Who really was spared under her radar? She isn't a bad person, as she knows what she has to do with her life. I appreciate her for being a self-made individual. But hey, that was her preoperative; that was her call; and those were her efforts. No one gained anything out of her being the way that she is.
The deal is simple - if you coexist in a society with people of different backgrounds and dispositions, it is your tacit responsibility to respect and show humility towards them. You cannot be "yourself" all the time. That is what happened in Sapna's case. I do not appreciate Sidhu for his double-standards either. But honestly speaking, calling him names like coward and what not was very uncalled for. She'd crossed the line there. As for the lajja
part, I still feel women shouldn't be offended when associated with it. If at all, women should consider themselves fortunate to have that lajja
tag to be majorly associated with them. They should cherish it. It's more or less an honorable title than just a price tag of sorts.
Edited by -Xaffron- - 10 November 2012 at 3:01pm