Lajja = Modesty = Women ?? - Page 22

@bold: That's exactly the issue here and the statement itself isn't something that is said casually as a compliment. It goes way beyond that. A statement like this has been imposed on women if they were to stand out or raise their voice. Objection has been raised not because we do not like anyone being modest, the objection has been raised when such statements are used to set boundaries for people who like to break the bondage and come out of the typical perception of the society. Use of such statements and perception of the society is one of the reasons why girls get the worse end of it when they try to speak up or be different.

And Roshan, the context in which Siddhu used the statement is anything but a compliment. From a guys POV, you are allowed to see it as a compliment or something you look for in girls. But as a girl, I would dislike use of such statements especially if used in a situation like Sapna. No one should criticize me for being loud or using foul language because I am a girl. Criticism should be for wrong actions but it shouldn't be because I belong to a specific gender.

Edited by -Chandramukhi- - 11 years ago

Grace and modesty is something I look for in guys as well, it doesn't have anything to do with gender. Guys are stereotyped being aggressive and expected to use foul language. So if I see someone who reflects just the opposite, I am not going to come around and say "Hey, you are supposed to act like a guy who should roll with aggression and swear words" No, I am not going to do that, instead I will be in awe of that person for being different. So you see the dichotomy here. That's why I dislike stereotypical image of man and woman in our society. Instead of this division on how a man or woman should act, wouldn't it be better if a moral set of values are to be expected outta any individual regardless of the gender. If Siddhu had said "Modesty is the ornament of any human" that statement itself creates a different impact on audience who are so used to hearing stereotypical statements from people. And when I say this I am in no way ignoring the physical inequality which are bound to be different in any gender.

Well, it was obvious that Sidhu was talking from a social standpoint. So what's wrong with that? Yes, I do agree that the virtues of grace and modesty apply to men equally, as I would myself detest any male who would come across as clamorous and obnoxious in their physical approach. However, since Sidhu was put on a pedestal by none other Sapna herself, he dared to have the effrontery to say that out loud. Anyway, I don't want to deviate from the topic here. What I feel is, she was called out on by Sidhu, keeping in mind her constant uncivil tantrums that she had been throwing around. I mean, come on, she's had a tiff with almost everyone in the house. Who really was spared under her radar? She isn't a bad person, as she knows what she has to do with her life. I appreciate her for being a self-made individual. But hey, that was her preoperative; that was her call; and those were her efforts. No one gained anything out of her being the way that she is.

The deal is simple - if you coexist in a society with people of different backgrounds and dispositions, it is your tacit responsibility to respect and show humility towards them. You cannot be "yourself" all the time. That is what happened in Sapna's case. I do not appreciate Sidhu for his double-standards either. But honestly speaking, calling him names like coward and what not was very uncalled for. She'd crossed the line there. As for the lajja part, I still feel women shouldn't be offended when associated with it. If at all, women should consider themselves fortunate to have that lajja tag to be majorly associated with them. They should cherish it. It's more or less an honorable title than just a price tag of sorts.

Thank you. 😊


Edited by -Xaffron- - 11 years ago

My dear, lajja aurat ka gehna hai is an actual phrase. Sidhu didn't make it up on the spot. It wasn't an impromptu thing. It's an actual phrase or saying, generally accepted by textbooks and journals.

You are pissing me off with your "Thank you" note in the end 😡😡😡

This post of yours is more dedicated and analyzed for Siddhu and Sapna. So I am not going to say anything on it, since that isn't the intention of my topic. I had opened the topic to discuss stereotypes beyond that of the show and Sapna, who you think deserved such statement. Your perception end of the day.

As for the bold part, it depends how the tag is used. If it will be used how Siddhu used it, I will dislike it and take every offense out there.

So that makes it alright to be used time to time on TV and movies and even on such platform. I don't think so. If that was the case, how are we supposed to move ahead from where we are today. Questioning and modifying or even rejecting such stereotypes makes one bring in the necessary change. Or we might as well be living in the ancient century without any progress in our thought process.
Edited by -Chandramukhi- - 11 years ago

I am sorry. 😳 I am sending you my love. ❤️😳

Many apologies for deviating from the topic (unintentionally, though). Talking of stereotypes, no one should be ground under the whetstones of generalizations and stereotypes.

Men = Macho = Don't cry = Mardaana = Chauvinist = WRONG!

Women = Docile = Crybabies = Weak = Petulant = WRONG!

Ah! Now that's a rhetoric in question! Well, in that case, you'd wanna ask (as I'd call them) the societal purists and juries. They'd probably have an answer or two for that one.

Education with enlightenment is the key, perhaps? 😊

Those social purists and juries can go "tel lene" for all I care 😉 As long as I know there are people who think along the same lines as me, it is all that is needed to bring in the required change, hopefully.

And yes, Education is the first step towards it 👍🏼

I'm glad I was able to make you feel better. 😆

Take care, Chandu.