Diya Aur Baati Hum

   

bhabho /Sandhya- Me, mom & grandma...Its about POV

Post Reply New Post

Page 1 of 2

Page 1
Page   of 2
Page 2 Page 2

pjarpi

Senior Member

pjarpi

Joined: 04 July 2012

Posts: 807

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 11:59pm | IP Logged

I have been observing the forum for some time now...and has seen most of us have kinda formed an opinion about bhabho.  Bhabho was given all sort of adjectives for her deeds. I have in between also seen few post wherein some one had tried to justify the deeds of bhabho...

To me this is fight between two generations; the fight of two thought process. I like most of us was completely with Sandhya and was hating bhabho ( cursing is right word) for behaving like that. It was all right till i had the conversation with my mom & my grandmother about it. Both of them are again regular view of DABH.  With that conversation i think i could have a sneak peak in what was the rational of bhabho doing all this.

Most of viewers of DABH are from traditional family and i am sure could relate to this behaviour of bhabho.  The effect of Suraj fighting or just trying to put up a a fight for her wife's dream already started to have implication on Joint family of Rathi's. Everyone would then want to have their way out which does not work in Joint family. Mostly the big brother of house ( in joint family) is suppose to make most of sacrifice to keep family together ( though not true in all case).  Having said that it does not mean sandhya's dream has to be ignored. But keeping both things together is very difficult thing.  For bhabho its a big situation, if she agrees to his son's request, tomorrow all other sons and daughter will come with some other thing and would want their way out. ( obv there no one sees what other things Suraj & sandhya had done for family). Mohit has already given hint for that. So would Meena/chavvi would also do. It would not be easy for bhabho or rather impossible for bhabho to then keep others under leash. Even bhabhasa has hinted has her dream was to become a doc or teacher it would have been easier to convince bhabho.

I understood the fight that was going on in mind of bhabho as she has been a family oriented lady like my grandmom.  For her lady is the one who binds the family together and for that she may have to sacrifice her dream and her happiness on the way. But then she gets happy along with her family, live their dreams. Times are changing and now the next generation ( that of my mom) who would have not been able to change that path in her days are ready to do so for their children. My mom can relate both to Bhabho and sandhya.  She would here try to see some balancing act. My mom would want me to fulfil my dreams and open to dreams of my Sister in law as well. However she would insist both of us to take care of our families as well .

There view point made me realise that Bhabho is not a negative person. She is not selfish for sure as she does not have her self interest. Her self interest is in interest of family.  She wants her son and family to be happy and together...and she wants sandhya to be the leader after her and keep family together ...i think i understand her POV also. Tactics she may be using to express this concern is still out of me...

I want Sandhya to fulfil her dreams  and also see family together. As i am from joint family i like to be part of it.  I think Suraj and sandhya would have to work together to make both of these happen. Cause sandhya becoming IPS at cost of family happiness would leave her with guilt.

Ghosh...to much written...now i will rest all of my problems on able shoulder's of our   CV's  and see how do they unfold the situation...and yes i know this is a main plot of story and would take longer time to unfold ..it justifies as well  cause you need to show that journey ...( i see few ppl complaining it being dragged) ...i see CV's doing full justice to this dilemma and i trust they woud come out with best way forward and parting line...for me now bhabho is not villain or selfish...she is not getting any sadistic pleasure in haressing sandhya...its just that she believes in her values which are different from next generation. So that journey of two thoughts coming together need to shown...and changing tradition and values which are getting outdated takes time...

The following 13 member(s) liked the above post:

Nisha_abiLovePrajapreeti73sadhana1234b2011Fizak-SamiR-vish.narenUMDUJuna04-Liebe-SAIBALROUTH-Amli-

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "bhabho /Sandhya- Me, mom & grandma...Its about POV" in Diya Aur Baati Hum forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

UMDU

IF-Dazzler

UMDU

Joined: 31 August 2012

Posts: 3185

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 12:14am | IP Logged
I am so glad to read this post. I have been in this forum from day one giving arguments to justify Bhabo's behaviour. I may not agree with her but I can definitely understand her . Infact I have taken out atleast 5 threads to defend her case. Here it is not a fight alone between generations it is also a fight whether to allow your bahu to become an IPS officer. I truly believe that even educated parents living in big cities may not take kindly to this idea. Bhabo is after all from a village.

The following 7 member(s) liked the above post:

pjarpib2011-SamiR-Fizakvish.narenJuna04-Liebe-

pjarpi

Senior Member

pjarpi

Joined: 04 July 2012

Posts: 807

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 2:38am | IP Logged
Originally posted by UMDU

I am so glad to read this post. I have been in this forum from day one giving arguments to justify Bhabo's behaviour. I may not agree with her but I can definitely understand her . Infact I have taken out atleast 5 threads to defend her case. Here it is not a fight alone between generations it is also a fight whether to allow your bahu to become an IPS officer. I truly believe that even educated parents living in big cities may not take kindly to this idea. Bhabo is after all from a village.
Y ai remember most of the post about bhabho was from you ...but i know understand there is no need to defend her...sh need not be blamed at all...

The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

b2011-SamiR-Fizakvish.naren-Liebe-

ladyterp

Senior Member

ladyterp

Joined: 02 October 2012

Posts: 286

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 5:23am | IP Logged
Nice thoughts.  I think the problem for those of us who post against Bhabho is not with her background or her determination to keep the family intact.  The problem is the path that she has taken to reach her destination.  It is not a straightforward path.  True that she is not going to gain anything personally but how about EGO?  Don't forget that most people are driven by ego, no matter how much one denies.  And that is for both educated and non-educated people.  Education has nothing to do with it.  Bhabho in my view uses family, traditions, life's difficulties as an excuse sometimes.  Even her husband is seeing through her dark shades now...I too grew up in a semi joint family on maternal side and trust me I saw nothing like this in my grandmother.  In fact my grandparents were so forward thinking that my aunt who became a widow at 21 got her remarried upon the insistence of my grandfather.  So for a person to be broad minded, education has nothing to do with it.  I carry that perspective of course based on what I saw growing up.  

The following 7 member(s) liked the above post:

pjarpib2011-SamiR-Fizakvish.naren-Liebe-Patrarekha

Juna04

IF-Rockerz

Juna04

Joined: 07 March 2009

Posts: 5037

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 7:16am | IP Logged
pjarpi  Thank you for your post here and you have expressed very well the exact situation in the Rathi family.

UMDU and I have in different posts have said the same things but you have expressed it very well.   In my posts I have wrongly used the word Selfish while referring to Bhabho but the way you have described her POV  is exactly what I meant to say.  

However the way she is trying to keep her family from going through changes is not good -  Asking Sandhya to give up all the things related to her dreams is very cruel and that is why I had said that her fear and insecurities are making her act selfishly.
Sandhya has already sacrificed a lot for the family besides her dreams and aspiration - she adapted to their way of life and culture since her upbringing was very different.
Asking her to give up the small pleasures like books and anything related to knowledge is not allowing me to justify bhabho's actions in the last episodeUnhappy

The following 6 member(s) liked the above post:

pjarpib2011Fizak-SamiR-vish.naren-Liebe-

vish.naren

IF-Dazzler

vish.naren

Joined: 08 May 2012

Posts: 4352

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 7:29am | IP Logged
Great a post Dear,Star Happy to see thatSmile u have share so much from ur heart and ur own life...! Embarrassed

To me this is fight between two generations; the fight of two thought process

Star Clap (excellent POV...)

There view point made me realise that Bhabho is not a negative person. She is not selfish for sure as she does not have her self interest. Her self interest is in interest of family. Embarrassed Thumbs Up (again, this what I believe in, I mentioned in LU thread yesterday that at some point Bhabho will realise the need of Sandhya's dream ans she will say Yes!! Embarrassed)

I want Sandhya to fulfil her dreams  and also see family together. Star Embarrassed

i see CV's doing full justice to this dilemma and i trust they woud come out with best way forward and parting line... (I do believe So...! Embarrassed)


for me now bhabho is not villain or selfish...she is not getting any sadistic pleasure in haressing sandhya...its just that she believes in her values which are different from next generation. So that journey of two thoughts coming together need to shown...


Yeah , I totally go with ur statement! Approve

and changing tradition and values which are gettingoutdated takes time...


Yeah  again n again..., I totally go with ur statement! Approve


The following 5 member(s) liked the above post:

pjarpib2011-SamiR-Fizak-Liebe-

pjarpi

Senior Member

pjarpi

Joined: 04 July 2012

Posts: 807

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 9:18pm | IP Logged
Thanks you all...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

vish.naren

UMDU

IF-Dazzler

UMDU

Joined: 31 August 2012

Posts: 3185

Posted: 06 November 2012 at 10:14pm | IP Logged
I also want to add that Bhabo knows fully well what a good soul Sandhya is. She also knows how devious Mohit and Chavvi are, what a penny pincher Vikram is and that Meena has no scruples and can betray anyone for her interests. She may not be educated but is street smart. She knows how to use them in her confrontation with Suraj to prove to him who holds the reins of the house. She will not hesitate to use any  way to prove her point and to remain the head of  the Rathi family hierarchy. She does not think of morality or ethics if she is convinced about something and no amount of reasoning will make her bend..She will do whatever it takes to keep her joint family intact. That is because that  is the source of her power. This is Bhabo for you.Like it or condemn it she will not change easily.

The following 4 member(s) liked the above post:

-SamiR-vish.narenSwerveBaeSAIBALROUTH

Post Reply New Post

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Topic Starter Replies Views Last Post
Please tell the name of actress who plays Bhabho

2

tanind 10 1386 10 December 2011 at 5:44am
By raspberrytorte
bhabho's cruelty

2

--jas-- 15 1500 03 December 2011 at 12:53am
By --jas--
Bhabho's punishment for Sandhya Harsh though she had Reason

2

desikudi2008 12 1144 02 December 2011 at 11:59pm
By b2011
heartless bhabho.. arshi_karish 9 831 02 December 2011 at 7:49am
By arshi_karish
In every house theres a Bhabho-indya.com Armu4eva 5 706 02 December 2011 at 6:45am
By Mizhi

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.