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Tahzeeb of Asad Ahmed Khan,Thank You note-11 (Page 15)

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S.Stephy

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S.Stephy

Joined: 29 September 2010

Posts: 3985

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 7:56am | IP Logged
I felt that Asad was being a bit hypocritical. He didn't want Najma to wear jeans because they are western clothes (that was the reason he implied). But he himself wears western clothes. Now, I don't mind if he prefers eastern clothes over western ones. But he seemed to have objected his sister from wearing western when he himself wears them...
 
And more than this being a religious issue, I think it is more of a cultural issue. I have seen this kind of double standards in the culture (not pertaining to any specific religion) where girls wearing jeans is sometimes frowned upon but not if guys wear...

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samantha1987200crazy4KASH_AR

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Aya.

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Aya.

Joined: 18 May 2012

Posts: 2715

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 8:20am | IP Logged
Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR

Originally posted by Aya.

Asma yaar, this is way too long.

Will read it later. Lol.


I know but when it comes to Asad aka KSG I don't know how to stop typing..
I really had to write everything in a crystal clear format to avoid many queries related to Asad's character.
I hope you could find some logic with this post.
Take care!
PS-Will be waiting for ur comments.

I don't think I need to add anything. You've spoken my mind.

I don't really like to bother with such things, because even after explaining to some people, they just still don't get it.

Some people here are making a big deal over a little statement & I didn't really find anything wrong with what Asad said.

I stayed up late reading all of it & it was really nice !

Great job Asma ! 

I've also learned a few things.

I really appreciate it.

Thank you ! : )

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crazy4KASH_AR

bary

IF-Rockerz

bary

Joined: 03 June 2008

Posts: 9729

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 9:47am | IP Logged
Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR

Originally posted by bary

hey can u also translate this,i am soo not good at understanding but well i do get the feel of the dialogue
<font size="4">jise aap pabandi keh rahi hain usey hum tahzeeb kehte hain
numaish pashchim ki ada hai , sharm purab ka gehna
Is mulq mein aurtein isi gehne se sajti hain
</font>



I'm glad to help you dear with the dialogue.I'm translating it into English

jisey aap pabandi kehti hain usey hum tehzeeb kehte hain

What you call as restriction we call it as culture

numaish paschim ki ada hai,shrm purab ka gehnha

Displaying things or showing off is an art of west, sharm(exact meaning shyness however here it refers to keeping things a bit hidden and not merely displaying it) is a jewellery of East

is mulq mein aurtein isi gehne se sajti hain

In this country women are adorned with this jewellery only.

I hope this helps you.

thanks a lot
i finally got the meaning and it some what matches to the feel of the dialogue beforeLOL,thanks and yes if i am hold to this show long enough,i may pester you with meaning of the dialogue i hope you dont mind

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crazy4KASH_AR

crazy4KASH_AR

IF-Sizzlerz

crazy4KASH_AR

Joined: 25 October 2008

Posts: 13214

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 9:53am | IP Logged
Originally posted by bary

Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR

Originally posted by bary

hey can u also translate this,i am soo not good at understanding but well i do get the feel of the dialogue
<font size="4">jise aap pabandi keh rahi hain usey hum tahzeeb kehte hain
numaish pashchim ki ada hai , sharm purab ka gehna
Is mulq mein aurtein isi gehne se sajti hain
</font>



I'm glad to help you dear with the dialogue.I'm translating it into English

jisey aap pabandi kehti hain usey hum tehzeeb kehte hain

What you call as restriction we call it as culture

numaish paschim ki ada hai,shrm purab ka gehnha

Displaying things or showing off is an art of west, sharm(exact meaning shyness however here it refers to keeping things a bit hidden and not merely displaying it) is a jewellery of East

is mulq mein aurtein isi gehne se sajti hain

In this country women are adorned with this jewellery only.

I hope this helps you.

thanks a lot
i finally got the meaning and it some what matches to the feel of the dialogue beforeLOL,thanks and yes if i am hold to this show long enough,i may pester you with meaning of the dialogue i hope you dont mind


You are most welcome to seek my help any time.This dialogue is just amazing.
I hope you read my reply to your views as well on this thread.
Thanks for your sweet comments.
Take care!

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

bary

bary

IF-Rockerz

bary

Joined: 03 June 2008

Posts: 9729

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 10:22am | IP Logged
Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR

Originally posted by bary

like he cant wear kurta to office she cant wear a salwaar to a disco well even if she did it just make her stand out of the crowd which she clearly dont want,if modern and old fashioned are decided by mentality not by clothes that can be taken in opposite way where if she is modern by clothes she still remain herself as old fashioned by heart just like she is modern by heart and old fashioned by clothes
not that i dont like him saying not to wear najma jeans infact i loved it soo much coz first we wont having this lovely discussion if he didnt said it..lol second it shows how protective he is towards his sister just like a father to this daughter who restricts many things which he thinks is not good for his daughter but make allowances some times just like he did when he wants her to go to new place but want her to come back before night and if she wants to go at night coz the damn place wont be open at night he still made allowance by dropping and picking her back and made another allowance but when she wanna change the way she is just to mingle with others he doesn't wanna make allowances to go that far,well even though the decision should be hers to make if it brings some experience of some bad thing or it being out her comfort zone asad wanna protect or prevent her from the experience which is quite awesome
lovely topic



I don't deny with the fact that wearing jeans or not should have been Najma's decision.
But if Najma decided to seek permission from her brother knowing very well his attitude then we need to understand that she is still Asad's baby sister.No matter how much freedom Asad gives her,at the end of the day she is looking forward to her bhaijaan only to make few decisions in her life.For her, it has been Asad who has played the fatherly figure in her life.that's the thing right,that's what i said Asad thinks and feel himself in the father position with najma,which i totally adore but what i meant is Asad thinks himself as if he is protecting his sis and he is doing it right coz najma is allowing his bro to protect her but what about when she stops allowing,when she starts hiding,when she starts refusing,dont you agree one feel more comfortable around a brother than a father,she even stopped watching tv wen asad came and hide the remote,dont know why but those small actions say some thing that she resents his father leaving her mother coz she misses her brother,she has a father in form of asad but she lost her brother in the way ...here i think zoya may be become a problem  in future,may be she will be the one to push najma into things or may be the show comes back to focus hero heroine romance(which is not bad but...well lets just say i there is no romantic moment which is not shown already)LOL
Asad's mom didn't seem to have a problem with Najma wearing jeans but in this matter she kept silence because she too had faith in her son's decision.
As much as I have understood Najma's character,she is still not enough capable of making major new decisions in her life.najma wants to do some thing but not with out the approval of her bhaijaan,see lets say i am not comfortable in jeans then i wont wear even my dad and mom insisted it but if i like wearing jeans but i dont wear it coz my dad n mom wont approve well that's not me not capable of decision,i am just having difficulty to follow my wishes which are being opposed
Unlike Asad,she always had her bhaijaan to guide her in every phase of her life.Asad had his mom but a father is as much necessary to a child as a mother.Fortunately, for Najma Asad is a fatherly figure.like i said she did have her father just not had a brother
Noone is going to say anything if one wears Kurta to office first of all apart from giving weird looks for few times but then people can get used to it.There is no dress code for wearing suits in office for men as such first of all.Not all people who work in office wear suits.We have men wearing pant shirts which is another formal wear again.yes yes you are totally right but in some they specify the dress code to be followed,any religion for men it should be followed,in some they should be in total formal along with tie some times
We see many women wearing ladies suits in corporate offices as well.Had wearing western formals been so essential,corporate offices must have been the first place to impose a dress code for women much before discos and all.women are made certain allowances in this field coz for one thing they cant force them to work if they are uncomfortable and but also the formal rule applies there just we women have power to ignore it LOL some companies are very strict though

Personally,if you take me to a lounge and if I'm used to wear traditional clothes all my life,then honestly speaking I'm going to accompany you in suits only.No matter how many weird looks I get but I'm going to a lounge in suits only.I can't step out of my own principles and be comfortable and party at the same time.even if you want to wear some thing non traditional?see every thing revolves around comfort,if one is comfort in jeans how can you deny it and if any one comment about us it shows they are the one with bad manners
Wearing suits is not old fashioned dear.In which world are you?hey,i am a total suit girl believe me my mom or dad doesnt have a problem with that as long as i dont and my friend constantly asks me to wear jeans but its not my comfort thing like hers,so i just tell i am better off with my salwars which are so damn comfortable
Just because women in the west wear apparels that are other than suits and sarees,it hardly means that suits/sarees have become old fashioned and don't fit in a place.Suits and sarees are formal wears as well and they have been made formals because of the cultural aspects of many countries.
Again personally,I may go to US and UK and won't change my style of living so that I can fit into a place.I can't change my lifestyle for pleasing others.najma did just that,see all i am sayind is she should have given an option not order if she is not comfortable then she wont do it again
I will change my dressing sense if I grow fond of certain dresses and wish to try them.
I'm not going to do this for any damn person or country or place or whatever.Thumbs Up

Sometimes I feel that in this decision of Asad I could connect one of my personality attributes to Asad.And that is why I mentioned my personal point of view as well in relation to this topic.

Asad didn't like that Najma wanted to change herself for her friends and a silly lounge.
As far as I have understood Asad,Najma is his beloved baby.
Had Najma been a bit mature,she might have found a way to convincce her bhaijaan.
At the first go noone can expect Asad to give her permission for wearing jeans owing to the reason she stated.
If Najma really wished to get into that attire and wanted to do it for herself,I don't think after too much persistence Asad would have said no.He can't keep on keeping aside the wishes of his sister and must have eventually given in.There are few things in which he knows that he should better make a decision for his sister and there are many things in which he has given full freedom to Najma.
Najma also understands this very well and that is why she turned up to her brother when she decided to change her outlook and get his permission.
There is always a way to make others agree to your wishes.
Najma seems a bit childish and she was unable to put forward her point properly according to me.well said like i explained once najma come out the childish nature problem may start
*****************************************************************************

I liked your post a lot and I tried my best to clarify my point of view regarding Asad's decision.You can still disagree because at the end of the day it's my personal opinion.actually we see the same coin from different sidesWink
I'm happy that you found this topic lovely and worthy enough to put across your points so well.its been so long i replied to any topic of any forms this sincerely thanks a lot
I'll be waiting for your reply.sorry for being late,just busy with college stuff
Take care!

swetha

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

crazy4KASH_AR

bary

IF-Rockerz

bary

Joined: 03 June 2008

Posts: 9729

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 10:25am | IP Logged
oh by the way nice to meet KaSh fan here,i am one too

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

crazy4KASH_AR

crazy4KASH_AR

IF-Sizzlerz

crazy4KASH_AR

Joined: 25 October 2008

Posts: 13214

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 10:28am | IP Logged
Originally posted by bary

Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR

Originally posted by bary

like he cant wear kurta to office she cant wear a salwaar to a disco well even if she did it just make her stand out of the crowd which she clearly dont want,if modern and old fashioned are decided by mentality not by clothes that can be taken in opposite way where if she is modern by clothes she still remain herself as old fashioned by heart just like she is modern by heart and old fashioned by clothes
not that i dont like him saying not to wear najma jeans infact i loved it soo much coz first we wont having this lovely discussion if he didnt said it..lol second it shows how protective he is towards his sister just like a father to this daughter who restricts many things which he thinks is not good for his daughter but make allowances some times just like he did when he wants her to go to new place but want her to come back before night and if she wants to go at night coz the damn place wont be open at night he still made allowance by dropping and picking her back and made another allowance but when she wanna change the way she is just to mingle with others he doesn't wanna make allowances to go that far,well even though the decision should be hers to make if it brings some experience of some bad thing or it being out her comfort zone asad wanna protect or prevent her from the experience which is quite awesome
lovely topic



I don't deny with the fact that wearing jeans or not should have been Najma's decision.
But if Najma decided to seek permission from her brother knowing very well his attitude then we need to understand that she is still Asad's baby sister.No matter how much freedom Asad gives her,at the end of the day she is looking forward to her bhaijaan only to make few decisions in her life.For her, it has been Asad who has played the fatherly figure in her life.that's the thing right,that's what i said Asad thinks and feel himself in the father position with najma,which i totally adore but what i meant is Asad thinks himself as if he is protecting his sis and he is doing it right coz najma is allowing his bro to protect her but what about when she stops allowing,when she starts hiding,when she starts refusing,dont you agree one feel more comfortable around a brother than a father,she even stopped watching tv wen asad came and hide the remote,dont know why but those small actions say some thing that she resents his father leaving her mother coz she misses her brother,she has a father in form of asad but she lost her brother in the way ...here i think zoya may be become a problem in future,may be she will be the one to push najma into things or may be the show comes back to focus hero heroine romance(which is not bad but...well lets just say i there is no romantic moment which is not shown already)LOL
Asad's mom didn't seem to have a problem with Najma wearing jeans but in this matter she kept silence because she too had faith in her son's decision.
As much as I have understood Najma's character,she is still not enough capable of making major new decisions in her life.najma wants to do some thing but not with out the approval of her bhaijaan,see lets say i am not comfortable in jeans then i wont wear even my dad and mom insisted it but if i like wearing jeans but i dont wear it coz my dad n mom wont approve well that's not me not capable of decision,i am just having difficulty to follow my wishes which are being opposed
Unlike Asad,she always had her bhaijaan to guide her in every phase of her life.Asad had his mom but a father is as much necessary to a child as a mother.Fortunately, for Najma Asad is a fatherly figure.like i said she did have her father just not had a brother
Noone is going to say anything if one wears Kurta to office first of all apart from giving weird looks for few times but then people can get used to it.There is no dress code for wearing suits in office for men as such first of all.Not all people who work in office wear suits.We have men wearing pant shirts which is another formal wear again.yes yes you are totally right but in some they specify the dress code to be followed,any religion for men it should be followed,in some they should be in total formal along with tie some times
We see many women wearing ladies suits in corporate offices as well.Had wearing western formals been so essential,corporate offices must have been the first place to impose a dress code for women much before discos and all.women are made certain allowances in this field coz for one thing they cant force them to work if they are uncomfortable and but also the formal rule applies there just we women have power to ignore it LOL some companies are very strict though

Personally,if you take me to a lounge and if I'm used to wear traditional clothes all my life,then honestly speaking I'm going to accompany you in suits only.No matter how many weird looks I get but I'm going to a lounge in suits only.I can't step out of my own principles and be comfortable and party at the same time.even if you want to wear some thing non traditional?see every thing revolves around comfort,if one is comfort in jeans how can you deny it and if any one comment about us it shows they are the one with bad manners
Wearing suits is not old fashioned dear.In which world are you?hey,i am a total suit girl believe me my mom or dad doesnt have a problem with that as long as i dont and my friend constantly asks me to wear jeans but its not my comfort thing like hers,so i just tell i am better off with my salwars which are so damn comfortable
Just because women in the west wear apparels that are other than suits and sarees,it hardly means that suits/sarees have become old fashioned and don't fit in a place.Suits and sarees are formal wears as well and they have been made formals because of the cultural aspects of many countries.
Again personally,I may go to US and UK and won't change my style of living so that I can fit into a place.I can't change my lifestyle for pleasing others.najma did just that,see all i am sayind is she should have given an option not order if she is not comfortable then she wont do it again
I will change my dressing sense if I grow fond of certain dresses and wish to try them.
I'm not going to do this for any damn person or country or place or whatever.Thumbs Up

Sometimes I feel that in this decision of Asad I could connect one of my personality attributes to Asad.And that is why I mentioned my personal point of view as well in relation to this topic.

Asad didn't like that Najma wanted to change herself for her friends and a silly lounge.
As far as I have understood Asad,Najma is his beloved baby.
Had Najma been a bit mature,she might have found a way to convincce her bhaijaan.
At the first go noone can expect Asad to give her permission for wearing jeans owing to the reason she stated.
If Najma really wished to get into that attire and wanted to do it for herself,I don't think after too much persistence Asad would have said no.He can't keep on keeping aside the wishes of his sister and must have eventually given in.There are few things in which he knows that he should better make a decision for his sister and there are many things in which he has given full freedom to Najma.
Najma also understands this very well and that is why she turned up to her brother when she decided to change her outlook and get his permission.
There is always a way to make others agree to your wishes.
Najma seems a bit childish and she was unable to put forward her point properly according to me.well said like i explained once najma come out the childish nature problem may start
*****************************************************************************

I liked your post a lot and I tried my best to clarify my point of view regarding Asad's decision.You can still disagree because at the end of the day it's my personal opinion.actually we see the same coin from different sidesWink
I'm happy that you found this topic lovely and worthy enough to put across your points so well.its been so long i replied to any topic of any forms this sincerely thanks a lot
I'll be waiting for your reply.sorry for being late,just busy with college stuff
Take care!

swetha


Have a test tomorrow.
I'll read your comments and get back to you later.
Thanks for the reply.
It's real fun to have healthy discussions on a debatable topic.
Take care!

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

bary

crazy4KASH_AR

IF-Sizzlerz

crazy4KASH_AR

Joined: 25 October 2008

Posts: 13214

Posted: 05 November 2012 at 12:47pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by bary

oh by the way nice to meet KaSh fan here,i am one too


I'm crazy about them
That's really nice to know..
But we should not discuss KASH here.LOL

LOL We are already doing that..
ROFL!!

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