Originally posted by fly_chick
Originally posted by crazy4KASH_AR
Originally posted by fly_chick Exactly right Asma :) I can totally understand Asad's POV of not allowing Najma to wear jeans, cos I myself have been in a similar situation. I live in the UK and my mom gives me all the freedom to wear and do whatever I want, but at the same time she maintains that line of limit too. There have been things (I'm not gonna indulge into details of what things specifically) that just like Najma I had wanted to do, solely cos my my friends were doing them and even though it would have put me out of my comfort zone I still wanted to do them to blend in with my friends and when I asked my mom she said a no straight away lol. Not because my mum is a hypocrite or something or she's orthodox, but cos she understand me well enough to know whether I'm doing something which is completely out of my comfort zone, for myself or for others and it's the same case with Asad and Najma. Initially I was pissed at my mum but then after when I gave it a thought I knew my mom was right. If I had actually wanted to do the thing for myself then I'm damn sure my mom would have agreed but the fact that I wanted to do simply for the reason my friends were doing it my mom didn't let me do it and if I have to change myself and my ways to blend in or please my friends then I'd rather not do it at all! Same case with Najma, she wanted to wear jeans and put herself out of her comfort zone just to please her friends and Asad knew that well that she wouldn't have been comfortable with it and doesn't allow her cos he understands her well. And the fact that she is asking Asad for permission, proves that she isn't capable of making some decisions herself and seeks her brother's guidance, who more than a brother is like a father figure for her.
</div><div>I agree with what you're saying. My parents also give me freedom to wear what I want and do as I like but to a point. Like you, I also had friends who did things that I wanted to do like going out in the evening etc but my dad did exactly what Asad did- I'll drop you and pick you up or your brother will so that scene made me laugh... However, there are certain things that my parents wouldn't allow me to do and rightfully so as it's out of my comfort zone but wrong aswell. I remember when I was at school, my friend asked me to smoke and I said No!My brother advised me to stay away from people who try to force you to do things you don't want to. I'm independant enough to know what I want and shouldn't do so I don't do it... najma on the other hand seems to be reliant on others and incapable of deciding for herself what's right or wrong...
I don't judge people based on what they do but at times you have to ensure that you don't change yourself for others...Do what you think is right...
Thanks a lot for discussing your personal experience.
You are absolutely correct dear.One should do things which he feels like doing rather than wishing to please others.
I'm sure all of us have read the donkey and father son story in childhood.
It's nice that you could understand your mother's point of view finally.
I love your posts dear.
You write really well.
Keep sharing your views like this always.
What's ur name?
Hey- you've opened up such a good post- I'd have to comment.
My names Zaria Ahmed.
Thanks a lot Zaria.I'm glad that you are loving this thread so much.
You have a nice name dear..
I'm glad to meet you.
Tell me more about yourself plz.