FF-Hail Storm in Thendral! (Page 4)

Smiles-20 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 21 March 2009
Posts: 8474

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 9:07am | IP Logged
Awesome part two loved the style of writing!! 

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Gisel Goldie

Joined: 01 December 2011
Posts: 2352

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 10:40am | IP Logged

Deepa and Praba's bedroom
Deepa is in front of the mirror draped in a normal but exotic red sareebatting eyelashes
She is ready, only her hair has to be dried. 
She has put all her hair on one side in the front and drying it with a baby pick turkey towelEmbarrassed
There are water droplets on her shoulders. 
The AC is on and the room is cool. Praba comes out of the bathroom and looks here and there, then looks towards the mirror. 
He sees Deepa and stares dumbstruckwave
He walks towards her slowlyEmbarrassed
Deepa busy drying her hair looks up in the mirror to find Praba walking towards herraised eyebrows
He reaches her and both of them look at each other in the mirrorhee hee
Praba clears his throat, "Konjam..."LOL
Deepa raises her eyebrow, "Hun?"
Praba clears his throat again, "Illa. Konjam towel venum. En towel a washing la poturukein.raised eyebrows"
Deepa removes the towel from her hair and gives it to him.
He takes it. 
Praba moves even forward now, both their shoulders touchingraised eyebrows
He leans forward making Deepa also lean forwardraised eyebrows, "Ahm..Sorry.."hee heeand takes his mobile from the dressing table and turns to go. 
He stops abruptly and turns again to face her, "Deepa!Embarrassed"
Deepa turns and looks at him. Praba is about to say something but then he looks at her eyes and stopskiss
Deepa, "Ena?"
Praba comes back to earthTongue, "Illa intha Saturday night konjam velila pogalama? Project work Friday mudithunu sonna la, summa oru treat mathiri.raised eyebrows"
Deepa, "Pogalam. Ana..Confused
Praba raises his eyebrows queringly. Deepa looks down, "College la ellarum tour poranga. Unga kita munadiya sollanum nu nenaichein ana ippo than time kadaichuthuOuch." Deepa looks up with enthusiasm to see he is expressionOuch
Praba gives a normal expression concealing his disappointmentOuch, "Oh! That's cool. Good. Enga poreinga? Evalo nallu? Fees pay panitala?Ouch"
Deepa, "Bangalore. Mysore..3 days..fees enum pay pannala, unga gita ketutu..Stern Smile"
Praba, "Cha. Ithu elam en ta kekanuma?Clap Delay pannama fees a pay paniruDisapprove."
Just then their patti comes in, "Ena da? Bangalore Mysore nu sound ketuchu?
(Holy crap! Don't follow TT's policy. Keep your doors closed!Angry)
Praba, "Athu onum illa patti...Deepa college la irunthu tour pora"
Patti, "College tour a? Ethira nalaiku?"
Praba, "Moonu nallu."
Patti, "Apdina antha 3 nallum college kadaithu apdi thana! Ithuku ethuku avala tourku annupira. Nenga rendu perum thaniya poita vanga. Oru honey moon mathiri achu laClap"
Praba and Deepa are shocked and look at each otherEmbarrassed.
Patti, "Ena da? Nenga onum sollavendam. Nan mudivu pannitein. Neenga porienga. Arrangements ellam nan pannurein." (Arre va! Open doors work best for themTongue!) and leaves.
There is an uneasy silence between them. 
Both of them begin to speak together and stop...They do it again...Embarrassed 
Deepa looks away. Praba leaves the room. Both of them smilingsurpriseWink.


Edited by Gisel - 22 October 2012 at 6:45am

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TTfan Goldie

Joined: 15 October 2010
Posts: 1420

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 12:08pm | IP Logged
Nice 3rd part Gisel.. well written..Thumbs Up

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Smiles-20 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 21 March 2009
Posts: 8474

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 12:08pm | IP Logged
Nice part three Deepa off to honeymoon and not going to the tour??

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Shemmo IF-Rockerz

Joined: 18 June 2010
Posts: 6909

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 12:20pm | IP Logged
Superb Gisel, you captured P & D relationship very well.. Clap Hahaha nice side commentss.. Loved itt.. Waiting for next part. My story thriller na, ur story pure romance... Too good Star

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Ajinth Groupbie

Joined: 22 August 2012
Posts: 54

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 1:02pm | IP Logged
nice ff gisel.
your romantice touch is good.
keep writing

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Arizes. IF-Dazzler

Joined: 14 November 2007
Posts: 3726

Posted: 16 October 2012 at 9:58pm | IP Logged
Wow Gisel, next with P and D...very nice start!!...

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Pearl. IF-Dazzler

Joined: 26 February 2010
Posts: 3219

Posted: 17 October 2012 at 4:34am | IP Logged
Thanks Gisel... P/D scenes nicely blended with the current track. Good oneClap! Well written.

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